Three is a Crowd
by Shoshanna33
Summary: Harry is caught in a love triangle to rival all else. He's found himself questioning his sexuality and is owning up to his attraction to Draco Malfoy. Meanwhile Draco is cozying up to Hermione, who won't give him the time of day. And Hermione keeps thinking there's hope for her and Harry to have a future together. It's a tangled web of emotions and will anyone get what they want?
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer:** I own none of the characters here. JK Rowling and company own them. I merely play with them for my own amusement. Please don't sue. I have nothing of value anyway.

 **Summary:** Harry is caught in a love triangle to rival all else. He's found himself questioning his sexuality and is owning up to his attraction to Draco Malfoy. Meanwhile Draco is cozying up to Hermione, who won't give him the time of day. And Hermione keeps thinking there's hope for her and Harry to have a future together. It's a tangled web of emotions and will anyone get what they want? Set a couple of years after Hogwarts ended. Told from Harry's POV. Drarry. With talk of Harmony and Dramione.

 **Three is a Crowd**

My life has never been ordinary. Not for a long time anyway. They call me the Boy Who Lived, but really I haven't done a lot of living lately. I share a house with my best girlfriend, Hermione and we both work for the Ministry of Magic. I'm an Auror in training and she works in Department of Magical Creatures. Neither of us have a social life to speak of. She dated my other best friend Ron for a while but it didn't work out. And I dated Ron's sister Ginny, which ended horribly and now she doesn't even want to look at me. I would tell you what happened but it's mortifying. But since I'm here to tell a story, I guess I don't get to pick and choose which parts I tell you or not. Basically we had disastrous sex, or rather non-sex, and she called it off. Didn't even give a bloke another shot! But the truth was, I didn't really want one. In my head I was all confused about who I was and what I wanted. But I never shared that with anyone else. And we mutually agreed to just tell people our chemistry was lacking. It wasn't a lie. It's just no one else knew that I was wishing she was somehow a guy. I should mention that I'm sexually ambiguous and don't know who or what I want. I'd say I'm more attracted to men, but women have a certain charm to them. Like Hermione. She has charm. And we're very close. Sometimes I think we're a little too close for friends, but she likes it that way. Me? I don't know what I like. Or who I like. I just know my life changed the day Hermione brought home a work colleague that we both knew well and hated ferociously. Draco Malfoy.

The two of them were tasked with a project that was slated to last several weeks to complete and this meant he'd be hanging around our house a lot. We were both none too happy about this, and neither was Draco. But he'd changed a lot since school and wasn't near as much of a prat. He was just obnoxious a lot of the time and had an obvious crush on Hermione, which she did not return. And this caused problems because he'd come to me to talk about her. And what was I to say? She couldn't seem to stand him. But I, on the other hand, found myself spending a lot of free time with Draco. He was funny. And he was cute. And he was completely unattainable. The three things I seem inexplicably drawn to without fail. But I wasn't the only one attracted to the unattainable. We all were. All three of us. Hermione fancied me, Draco fancied Hermione, and I fancied Draco. This was a recipe for disaster. And I'm here to tell you our story. My name is Harry Potter. And this is my life.

Today was really like any other day. I went to work, came home to find Draco Malfoy in my kitchen eating leftover pizza, while Hermione yelled for him to hurry up and come back to the living room with some sort of case files. Honestly Draco seemed as bored by the case files as I was, and would much rather ask me about my day than anything else.

"So Potter, what's happening in your world? They send you out after any dark wizards by yourself yet?" Draco asked, as he shoved a piece of cold pizza in his mouth.

"Ugh, no. They say I'm not ready yet. But I think I'm plenty ready to go after one measly dark wizard when I killed Voldemort at seventeen," I lamented.

"Still don't trust you eh?"

"Nope."

"I think you were born ready. I can't believe the shit you used to do. It's pretty impressive," Draco admitted.

"Thanks," I stammered, not used to hearing such kindnesses coming from his lips. "I expected you to make fun of me."

"Nah. I've grown. Besides I'm just glad no one's coming after me or my family. And I know I have you to thank for that," Draco shrugged.

It was true. My testimony about Draco's family and his mother's lie to Voldemort really helped them out of a bind. They were let go and got a second chance, but not everyone agreed with it. Including Hermione. But she was making due with working with him. But she was impatient.

"Draco, hurry up. I'm sick of doing your share of the work too," Hermione said as she burst into the kitchen, interrupting us.

"Relax princess. I was just talking to Potter. Did you know they won't send him out alone yet? I think it's right stupidity they're keeping him stifled," Draco told Hermione.

"Please don't call me princess, you Neanderthal. Just get your pizza and come back to the living room. Or else we'll be here all night. And sorry Harry. It sucks they won't let you go out," Hermione added as she gave me a peck on the cheek and grabbed a Coke from the fridge. She was in and out so fast I couldn't even say anything. Draco looked at me.

"Is she always this big of a pain in the ass?" he wondered.

"Always."

"I would love to get her between the sheets, if you know what I mean," Draco sighed dreamily.

My mood fell instantly.

"Good luck with that one. It'll never happen. Trust me."

"Why not? She doesn't give you any play either?" Draco wondered.

"We're just friends. So no. But she hates you. I'd have a better chance I think," I informed him, knowing full well it was true.

One time Hermione got drunk and tried to seduce me. I refused, and the next day I pretended like I didn't remember what happened. It was for her sake. But I never forgot. I just didn't want it to complicate our friendship. But I knew there was no chance in hell she'd ever sleep with Malfoy.

"Mark my words. One of these days, she'll want me. I don't know when, but I'll be there. And I'll slip in and have a real nice day. There's something so hot about a girl who hates you, you know?" Draco said with a shrug.

"I wouldn't know."

"I mean, look at me," Draco said, holding up his hands and turning around for me to get a good look at his physique. I gulped audibly and Draco laughed. "Even _you_ were checking out my ass, weren't you?"

"What?" I stumbled over my words awkwardly. "N-no, I wasn't!"

"Yeah you were. It's okay. I mean, it is a good ass. I'd stare at it too if I could see it properly without needing to be a contortionist," Draco mumbled.

"I wasn't looking!"

"Whatever. Point is, she won't be able to resist me. I just gotta be patient," Draco said nonchalantly.

"Well I wasn't looking at your ass so I don't know if it has superpowers or not," I said indignantly. I _was_ in fact looking at the ass. And it was spectacular. But that was beside the point. I still didn't think Hermione would fall for it. But I would. In a heartbeat. If only Draco weren't so straight.

"I bet you could get a girl too if you wanted. You're not so bad. I mean the hair is all wrong and the glasses are lame and the scar? Well, I'm sure someone could overlook those things. Turn around and show me your ass," Draco said with a grin.

"What? No! You are so weird. Just go back to work with Hermione before she comes back in here and kills you," I said, feeling my face turn red.

Draco walked past me and slapped my ass and said, "Oh yeah, that's not bad," with a chuckle. Hmm, maybe he wasn't so straight after all?

But then he was gone. He walked out of the kitchen. And I just figured he was messing with me big time. It was his favorite thing to do. He ate our food and lived to turn my face colors and drive Hermione and I both insane. But there was something kind of charming about it. Like he found it charming that a girl would hate him, I found it kind of charming that he was such a pain in the ass. Maybe we both needed therapy?

I went out to the living room with the last of the pizza and just sat on the couch and watched as Draco and Hermione bickered over paperwork. I kept noticing the way Draco would lean over close to Hermione and she'd respond by pulling back and away. Then she'd look up at me all nervous like and I could tell she was wondering what was going on in my head. But the only thing I could really focus on was Draco's shoulders and the slope of his neck and the way his messy blonde hair fell haphazardly into his eyes now that he was older and didn't wear so much product in his hair. He always looked like he'd just had a good shag and I wondered how often that was true. It seemed like he was always here these days so it probably wasn't true enough. But today was Friday night. It wasn't a night to work forever. It was to have fun. So I suggested this to the crowd.

"We should do something fun. Work can fuck off for a while, don't you think?" I said to them.

"You want to do something fun? Like what?" Hermione asked with confusion, seeing as how I was a total homebody recluse most of the time and never suggested these things. But I wanted to impress Draco. I wanted to be fun like he was.

"I don't know. We could have some drinks. I've got loads of whiskey and also you've got all that wine people keep giving you that you rarely drink. Let's get drunk!" I tossed out randomly.

"I'm sure Draco has better places to be," Hermione said, giving him a look.

"Nope. I don't. And you know what, sod all this work. Like Harry said, it can wait a while. Let's have some fun," Draco readily backed up my outrageous plan.

"Fine. I suppose it is getting late and it is Friday night. But I'm not drinking that much!" Hermione protested.

"No worries. We'll drink enough for all of us. Right Harry?" Draco smirked at me.

"Definitely."

The truth was, I wasn't a big drinker. I did it sometimes and I had a big supply on hand for other people, but I rarely ever partook. So you could say I was a lightweight. Whereas I assumed Draco had been sipping two hundred year old bottles of cognac in his nappies. But I was determined to make this a good time. Not that I thought it would get me anyplace with Draco, but it might at least give me some cool points. I got out my bottles of whiskey and Hermione got a bottle of wine, and we all just opened it up and went to town. The next thing I knew, Draco and I were alone in the living room lying on the floor practically on top of each other. He had his arm draped over my shoulder and his face was only inches from mine. He clutched my shoulder.

"Are we on the ceiling?" he asked with confusion.

"No, we're on the floor. You're _looking_ at the ceiling." I explained, trying not to lose my wits with him so close to me.

"Shit I feel like I'm on the ceiling," he said blinking really fast. "Where'd Heriminyione go?" he stammered and butchered her name.

"Her name is Hermione and I don't know where the fuck she went. The loo?" I offered.

"Stupid Granger girl. I can say Granger girl. Herminiones is a fucking weird name," he chuckled to himself.

"I'm kinda of glad my name is just Harry. It's simple."

Draco leaned over and stared me in the eyes. His gaze was so intent I swore he could tell everything I was thinking and I wanted to die, but he just laughed and poked my forehead.

"That lightning scar is funny looking. Harry Potter. Harry Potter. Mr. Potter. Potter, Potter, Potter." Draco just kept saying my name and laughing. I didn't know what to do so I returned the gesture.

I poked him in the forehead and said, "Your hair is stupid. Malfoy. Mr. Malfoy. Draco Malfoy."

Then we both just dissolved into a fit of laughter that only the drunkest of people get stuck in. And that's when Hermione found us rolling around the floor together laughing at nothing. But she was dressed in a sequined dress and had a feather boa. It was her Halloween costume from last year. I didn't know why she had it on but she turned on music and beckoned Draco off the floor and asked him to dance with her. He leapt at the chance and left me lying alone on the ground. I watched them dance and it was clear they were having fun. But it was fun I wasn't a part of so I had to somehow fix that. So I got up and stood behind Hermione and put my hand on her hips and started dancing along with them. The next thing I knew poor Hermione was squished between a Harry and Draco sandwich. But she didn't seem to mind. But I did notice she kept leaning back to me and touch my neck and Draco would lean forward and try and kiss hers and I just stood there and swayed to the music. That was when I fully realized the hell hole my life was made of. _I_ wanted _him_ and _he_ wanted _her_ and _she_ wanted _me_. And frankly none of us were getting what we wanted, no matter how drunk we were.

The next thing I realized we had all fallen down on the couch and were just lying in a heap with Hermione in between us. I had the feather boa on and Draco was wearing Hermione's dangly hoop earrings that were a clip on style. And she just stared at both of us and laughed.

"I'll pay one of you ten thousand galleons if you put on my dress," Hermione chimed in with a giggle.

"Love, you don't have ten thousand galleons but I do. And I'll pay you that much just to take off the dress," Draco drawled at her while running his hand up her arm.

She shoved him away playfully.

"Dream on!"

"Well how am I supposed to put the dress on if you're still in it?" Draco wondered.

I piped up. "He has a good point. You'd have to take it off for one of us to put it on."

"Shut up Harry! You're not supposed to be on his side. And anyway, I meant I'd take it off upstairs and then put something else on first," she explained.

"I'm not putting on a sodding dress," Draco laughed.

"Don't look at me! Neither am I!" I protested.

"You're both no fun. I got all fancied up and the least you could do is get fancy too."

"We'll put on suits or something. Not dresses. Are you brain damaged, woman?" Draco asked her.

"I don't remember asking you to get fancy," I pointed out.

"Ugh, I did it for you mostly. I swear sometimes Harry, you need to catch a clue," Hermione lamented as she got upset and walked out of the room, leaving us lying on the couch together.

"Shit, she's mad at you," Draco told me.

"I got that message, thanks."

"She likes you, you little bastard. She got dressed up for you and not me," Draco said admitting defeat.

"I don't want her like that," I explained to him.

"Why not? She's gorgeous. I spent years hating the lot of you, but she was always fucking gorgeous. Like at the Yule Ball?"

"Doesn't matter. I'm not saying she's not pretty, it's just I don't feel that way for her," I tried to explain.

"Why not? Are you gay?" Draco laughed and poked my side hard.

"Shut up! No!" I protested vehemently, never wanting to put a label on it.

"It's okay if you are. I've got nothing against homosexuals."

"Shut up! I'm not gay. Just because I'm not interested in _one_ girl doesn't mean I'm not interested in _any_ girls," I pointed out.

"Who was the last girl you fucked?" Draco prodded me.

"Someone you don't know," I shot back.

"Who? I know everyone."

"You don't know her!"

"You're lying. Why not just admit you've never shagged anyone," Draco said, hitting me very close to home.

I wanted to protest, but he was right. I'd tried to have sex with Ginny, but I couldn't keep it up. It was humiliating. And there hadn't been anyone else. And for some reason I wanted to tell Draco this truth, even though he was making fun of me.

"Fine. You're right. There's never been anyone. Not really," I sighed and covered my face with my hands.

"Holy shit, I was just fucking around with you, but you're serious. You've never shagged _anyone_? _Never_?" Draco sat up straight and looked at me seriously.

"No," I cast my eyes downward and away from him.

"Fuck me," Draco said shaking his head and I momentarily got confused.

"Huh? Fuck _you_? What makes you think I want to fuck you?" I stammered out nervously.

"It's a saying, you dimwit. Like, fuck me, I can't believe you're a virgin! Not _fuck me_ , I wanna have butt sex with your gorgeous self," Draco started laughing uncontrollably.

I felt like an idiot. A right and proper idiot. Of course he wasn't asking me to fuck him. What alternate universe did I think I stepped into? I was so drunk I wasn't even making any real sense to myself anymore. But I slapped Draco on the back, fairly hard.

"Quit laughing at me, you dumbass. I knew what you meant. I was just joking around," I lied to him.

"God I hope so. But seriously Harry, what gives? No sex? How old are you now? 21?" Draco asked me.

"Yeah. Just turned."

"You didn't even shag what's his names sis? Weasley?"

"I tried but it didn't work," I admitted shamefully. I'd never told this to anyone. Ever. Never ever. And here I was telling Draco of all people.

"How can it not work? I don't understand."

"I couldn't, you know, _perform_. She dumped me. It wasn't a good time for me and I never tried with anyone else."

"Are you gay? For real. No fooling. I wouldn't care if you were," Draco said, sitting up and touching my arm.

"If I said yes, you'd never let me hear the end of it. Besides, the truth is, I don't know. I like girls. I really do. I just don't think I want to have sex with them," I explained truthfully.

"Harry, that's sort of the definition of gay," Draco laughed slightly, but not in a mocking way.

"No it's not. Wanting to fuck men means you're gay. I-I'm not sure I want anyone. Maybe I'm asexual?" I offered, not ready to admit my lusty thoughts about Draco.

"Asexual? For real? You don't wanna shag at all? Now _that_ I don't get," Draco admitted with a shake of his head.

"Lots of people are."

"Yeah, maybe. But I don't think that's what you are. I think you're just confused."

I planned to protest, but I couldn't. And I was drunk and getting tired. So I just shrugged.

"Yeah, I am confused. And no one knows this, so please don't tell Hermione. Can this be our secret?" I asked hopefully.

"Sure, sure. I won't say anything. I know I come off like a dick sometimes, and it's a valid observation of me. But I kinda sorta like you and Hermione more than I wish I did. So I won't fuck your shit up. My lips are sealed. Although my personal opinion is that you should tell her how you feel. She's got a crush on you. It's clear to see. At least don't let the girl pine."

Draco had a point, much as I didn't want to believe it. But telling Hermione would be a huge deal and would result in her wanting to talk endlessly about it all and might even hurt her feelings in the process. I wasn't really looking forward to talking to her about it.

"Can we just keep it between us right now?" I pleaded with him.

"Yeah, okay. But really, if you're a homo, I don't mind," Draco shrugged.

"Pretty sure you're not supposed to call people 'homo's'," I pointed out.

"Sorry. I'm learning. But if you're into dicks and not chicks, it's okay with me."

"Thanks. I think. You really need to work on your delivery of comforting words. But I can't even believe you're not judging me or making huge fun of me. Who is this new Draco and what happened to the old one?" I wondered aloud.

"Look, I'm still me. I just know it can be hard to question your sexuality and people kill themselves over that shit. I don't wanna be a dick about it. I'd rather be your friend. I mean, aren't we sort of friends now? I spend a shitload of time at your flat."

"Yeah, but you're working. It's not like you're hanging out with me as my friend."

"Tonight I am. We're drinking together and sharing secrets. That's what friends do. Which speaking of, does the ginger dipshit know about this?" Draco asked drunkenly.

"His name is Ron, and no, he doesn't know. I could never tell him. I don't think he'd understand," I lamented.

"But you're telling _me_?" Draco was confused.

"I care a lot less what you think of me," I shrugged honestly.

"Point taken. But I'm more likely to tell the entire world your secret."

"But you won't. You promised," I reminded him, hoping I wasn't a complete fool for telling him this.

"I know. And I won't. But you didn't know that. Why tell me of all people?" Draco was very confused.

"I have no clue. You were there and I'm drunk. But please don't make me regret telling you," I begged of him. Just then Hermione walked back into the room in her pajamas.

"Don't make you regret telling Draco what?" she asked me.

"Nothing! It was just some stupid thing," I tried to brush it off.

"Yeah, it was just a guy thing. You wouldn't get it anyway," Draco said, winking at me slyly to show he could be a friend.

Hermione was too drunk to notice the wink and too bored of us to prod for more questions.

"Alright. Boys and their stupid secrets. I really need more girlfriends. What's on the telly?" she asked as she grabbed the remote.

"I have no idea," I admitted, not really in the mood for telly time.

"I'm gonna go outside and get some fresh air," Draco said, getting off the couch and taking off the clip on costume earrings.

I watched him go out the back door and I turned to Hermione.

"So you really got dressed up fancy for me?" I asked her quietly.

"Yes. Lot of good it did. Harry you're so clueless sometimes," she sighed and laid her head on my shoulder.

"I'm not clueless, I just don't want to ruin our friendship. I love you, Hermione. You're my favorite person. I don't ever want to mess that up," I said with incredible sincerity. So much so, my drunk self was getting teary eyed like a moron. She pulled me into a hug.

"Oh Harry. You're such a complete gentlemen, even if I sometimes wish you weren't. But I get it. You don't fancy me. Not like that. I understand," she sighed unhappily.

"It's not that I don't fancy you, it's just I think we're better off as friends. Besides, Draco fancies you! I think you should give him a try."

" _Draco_? Draco _Malfoy_? Have you lost it? No way. I mean, sure, he grew up way cuter than I ever thought he would. But still. No. I don't care if he fancies me. I still remember what a bully he was," she shook her head.

I should remember too what a bully he was. And a jerk. And a fuckwad. And he was quasi evil for a while. I should remember those things too. The truth is, it just didn't seem to matter anymore. We were all beyond that. And he really had changed. Maybe I wanted Hermione to have a go with Malfoy just because I couldn't? And also, maybe it meant he'd stick around once the work project came to an end. But Hermione wasn't being swayed to it.

Just then Draco came back inside and he smelled like cigarettes.

"Were you smoking?" Hermione asked distastefully.

"I had one or two puffs. Sue me. I sometimes smoke when I'm drunk. Which speaking of drunk, I need another shot of whiskey. Where's that bottle Harry?" he asked me.

"Over there," I pointed to the table.

Draco went over and chugged it and offered some to me, which I readily took. Hermione was bored of drinking, but us boys weren't done yet. We decided to go outside together with the bottle and just look at the stars in silent company. Like it or not, Draco and I had a bond now. He knew my darkest secret when no one else did. And I felt like I should be really worried about that, but instead I was just relieved to tell someone. I just had no idea why I decided that person should be Draco. The object of my wayward lust. He was in actuality the worst person I could tell, yet somehow the fact that he wasn't judging me gave me some sort of hope. Maybe my life wouldn't be utter shit after all? But it was impossible to really tell what he was thinking as we sat together on the back steps and passed the whiskey bottle back and forth between us. Finally he spoke.

"So Potter, how long have you known you were queer?" he asked slurring his words slightly.

"I'm not _queer_. I'm _confused_. There's a difference," I insisted.

"Alright well how long have you been confused?"

I sighed and had to think really hard about it. I wasn't entirely sure. I just knew that most girls always confused the hell out of me and scared me a little. Except Hermione. For some reason she was always like one of the boys to me. Which I knew she didn't want to be anymore, but it was how I felt. I turned to Draco.

"I think I've been confused for a long time. Ever since my first kiss."

"Who was that with?"

"Cho."

"I don't really remember her."

"Well we kissed and she was crying because Cedric died and he was her boyfriend. Except he was dead and now she was free, but I guess she was still sad. But I kissed her anyway. And I just remember it was wet. And awkward. And kinda gross," I shrugged.

"You kissed a girl whose boyfriend just died? Were you mad?" Draco laughed at me.

"No, it wasn't _right_ after. It had been awhile. It's not like I told her he was dead and attacked her with my lips. But either way, it sucked," I admitted.

"And things weren't any better with that Weasley girl?"

"They were better, yes. But still a little awkward. I dunno. It just felt strange. And I kept thinking of Ron."

"Ron? Oh god, did you want to kiss _him_ instead?" Draco wondered.

"No! Totally not. I just meant I thought of Ron and wondered if he'd kill me for kissing his sister. I didn't want to ruin our friendship," I clarified.

"So then you never had a thing for your friend Ron?"

"No! Never. You do realize that just because someone is gay, which I'm not even sure I am, doesn't mean we want to kiss every guy we know. We can just be friends with people," I told him vehemently.

"I know that. But still. I'm curious. You wanna kiss me?" Draco asked and I felt my face turn red with fire. I was so glad it was dark and he couldn't tell. At least I didn't think he could tell.

"You wish," I shot back at him before taking the bottle back and chugging it.

Draco laughed. "I don't wish that. Believe me. I don't wanna kiss you, Potter."

"Well I certainly don't wanna kiss you, Malfoy," I lied.

"That's where I draw a line. I don't care if you like guys, just don't kiss _me_ ," he said, which deflated me instantly, even if I shouldn't be surprised.

"Well don't worry. I'm not gonna kiss you. You're not my type," I lied again.

"Good."

"Wonderful."

"Perfect."

"Yes, it is perfect," I said with a sigh.

"Think Hermione will ever go out with me?" he asked, changing the subject thankfully.

"Doubtful. She thinks you suck," I informed him.

"What have I really done to her lately? I mean sure, in school I was a fucker, but I've matured."

"She still doesn't like you. She has a long memory."

"I've been working with her now for almost a year. You'd think she'd get over it by now."

"Why are you working with her anyway? Don't you have endless piles of family money? Why do you work?" I wondered drunkenly.

Draco shrugged and took a swig. "I don't want to be my father. He has no life. He just sits at home by the fire staring at his priceless knick knacks. I wanted to do something."

"Magical creatures? You don't even like magical creatures. Not since Buckbeak attacked you," I laughed slightly.

"Shut up. That fucking thing was a menace. And I do like magical creatures. Some of them. I liked Dobby. He was _my_ elf, even if he thought _you_ were awesome. He was mine first," Draco said.

"Dobby was miserable at your house."

"Not because of me. I treated him good. My father on the other hand was not so kind. But my father never is. To anyone. Not even to me," Draco lamented, taking another drink.

"Do you see him much?" I wondered softly.

"Nah, not really. My mum I see more. My father thinks I'm wasting my life at the Ministry in a stupid job. But anything less than Minister of Magic would be considered menial and stupid to him. I don't care what he thinks."

"I'm tired of being in training. How much more should I have to prove myself to these people? I think I can catch some bad guys now. But they say I need more experience," I explained with irritation.

"I think you're just notorious for leaping into things without always thinking them through. You've got a wicked hero complex. Maybe they just want you to think more? I mean you did do some dumb shit that I'm amazed you didn't die from," Draco chuckled.

"Like what?" I said indignantly.

"Like attacking a mountain troll. Or flying a car to school."

"I didn't fly the car. Ron did. And what was I supposed to do about the troll? It was going after Hermione!"

"You also saved my ass once in the Room of Requirement. You could have died and should have left me, but you didn't."

"I wasn't gonna leave you in there," I said with a shrug.

"Why not? I deserved it," he admitted.

"No you didn't. It's all water under the bridge anyway. I'd do it again. I'd do it all again," I smiled at him slightly.

"See, this is why they probably don't trust you. You admit to doing some misguidedly stupid things and aren't even sorry about it," Draco ribbed me and poked my side.

"Yeah, yeah. I'm not sure why trouble always finds me, but it does."

"Think we should go back inside? I wanna see Hermione some more," Draco said, shifting the subject.

"We could go back inside."

I gathered up the bottle and brushed my pants off. Draco did the same and we headed inside to find Hermione asleep on the couch.

"Damn. She's out cold," Draco sighed. "Well I guess this is my cue to go home."

I wanted to tell him not to leave and to stay with me and talk more. I could talk all night to him, really. But Draco was ready to leave. The person he wanted to spend time with was asleep. He wasn't there for me. I had to try and remind myself of that. But we had bonded. He couldn't deny that. Could he? I mean, secrets were shared. At least _my_ secrets. He didn't share any with me. But I still didn't want him to go. He did anyway. I just thanked him for not spoiling my confidences in him and he patted me on the back and said not to worry. And then he apparated away. Just like that. I sat down on the couch next to Hermione and put her feet in my lap. She had the telly on some channel with infomercials on it and I just watched this amazing blender while I rubbed her feet and tried to keep the room from spinning around me. I was very drunk. And kind of lonely. But I resolved to buck it up and just let myself pass out on the couch and slip into a blissful coma calm.

To be continued….


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer:** I own none of the characters here. JK Rowling and company own them. I merely play with them for my own amusement. Please don't sue. I have nothing of value anyway.

 **Summary:** Harry is caught in a love triangle to rival all else. He's found himself questioning his sexuality and is owning up to his attraction to Draco Malfoy. Meanwhile Draco is cozying up to Hermione, who won't give him the time of day. And Hermione keeps thinking there's hope for her and Harry to have a future together. It's a tangled web of emotions and will anyone get what they want? Set a couple of years after Hogwarts ended. Told from Harry's POV. Drarry. With talk of Harmony and Dramione.

 **Three is a Crowd**

The next couple of days were boring for me. Draco didn't come around because it was the weekend. I suppose he had better things to do than to hang out with the girl he worked with and her lame sidekick with no social life (which would be me). Hermione didn't miss Draco at all and spent her time cleaning the house and making me play wizard board games and watching the telly with her. It was kind of like we were married, except no sex. So it was exactly like we were an old married couple who had graduated beyond the sex and now everything was chess and the telly. I think both of us kind of envisioned this living arrangement lasting forever, except I knew she did eventually want to get married to a real guy. Not me. Or rather maybe me, but that wasn't going to happen. I'd never do that to her when I knew deep down my longings lie elsewhere and I couldn't give her what she deserved. And that was a good dicking. At least that's what Draco told me when I saw him again next. He said that's what she needed and that I should just man up and do it because maybe then I'd see I wasn't really gay. Like sex with Hermione would someone cure me. He doesn't get it. But he also told me if I didn't do it, he was gonna find a way to do it himself. He said Hermione's dull housewife life was sad beyond measure and he wanted to fix it. I didn't much like the things he was saying but I was relieved to have him at our house again. He was sitting in the kitchen right now while Hermione organized papers in the living room.

"I'm telling you Potter, just bend her over a table and give it to her good. Then you'll both feel better," Draco instructed me.

"Will you shut up? I'm not doing that. Our friendship is more complex than that. I can't just give her a good 'dicking'. Is that even a word?" I wondered idly.

"Sure it is. And sure you can. If I were you, I would," he told me.

"There's actually someone else I'm sort of interested in," I stammered out nervously, not wanting to tell him the truth, but feeling the need to get him off the subject of Hermione.

"Really? Who? A girl? Or a dude?" he prodded me.

"It's a guy. And when I'm with him, I get all tongue tied and my stomach does flip flops," I explained the way he made me feel.

"Well then go for it!" he encouraged me.

"I can't. I-I don't think he's that way. I'm pretty sure his door only swings one way towards women," I admitted.

"Then that's no good. But are you sure? Sometimes it's tricky to tell. A lot of guys hide it well. Sometimes the truest test is the guy talking all kinds of game about girls. He over compensates because of his lack of heteronormativity," Draco explained.

"Heteronormativity? That's a big word. Is it on your word of the day calendar?" I joked with him.

He stuck his tongue out at me.

"It's a real word. And I just mean, some guys who are ultra-stuck on traditional roles are actually the ones who are gay. It's a fact."

"So then how would I ever know? I don't think I was born with this Gaydar thing everyone talks about."

"Tell me who the guy is and I'll give you my opinion," Draco offered.

I stood up and began pacing.

"No. No way. He remains nameless. Besides I think he's just straight and not over compensating."

"Does he talk about his cock a lot?"

"What? No!"

"I was gonna say that's another sign he's closeted. If he boasts how amazing it is to other men he's trying to get them interested."

"Where are you even getting this information from? I think you're full of shit," I challenged him.

"I'm not full of shit! I've seen this on the telly," he announced.

"The telly? That's where your information comes from? It's all bullshit. You're sort of useless as a wingman, Malfoy," I said with defeat at realizing Draco was just talking out his ass and didn't really know anything.

"Suit yourself. Now where is that Hermione? God I wanna fuck her. I bet she'd be all over me if she knew how big I was and how many satisfied customers I've had…" he said dreamily.

I just sat there and stared at him. He was basically doing the exact thing he told me to look out for. Was this a sign? Was this his way of telling me the truth? I was even more confused than ever before. But I didn't have time to ponder it more when Hermione interrupted us.

"Harry, you gotta stop feeding this guy's delusions that you're friends. We're never going to get any work done if he's always in here talking to you," she announced.

"He is my friend," I told her softly.

"Yeah, we're right mates. Water under the bridge and all that. Harry's the best," Draco said with a laugh, laying it on thick.

"Shut up. You know you like me," I stuck out my tongue at him.

"Be careful who you stick your tongue out at because someone might bite it off," Draco teased as he tried to poke me in the side again, but I moved away.

Hermione sighed loudly.

"Hello? Still in the room. And we have a deadline Draco. At least let's finish up the current case file and then you and Harry can make out or whatever it is you're planning to do," she joked and shoved Draco over.

"Fine, fine. Work, work, work. I'm bored of this job. Wanna drink again later?" Draco asked me as he stood up and went to the door to the living room.

"It's only Monday," I pointed out.

"So? Any nights good for getting shit faced."

"Sure. Okay."

And then I watched him walk out of the room making faces at the back of Hermione's head like he was gonna grab her and kiss her or give her that 'dicking' he talked about. Good thing she didn't see him or else he probably wouldn't have left the house with said dick. But I had to wonder if his misogynistic tendencies and comments were a signal of something deeper, just like he said. Did men really do that to hide their true feelings? I bet some of them really did. Not all of them, of course. I hadn't done that. But maybe someone like Draco would?

Once they were done working, Hermione was going to leave us alone, but Draco convinced her to at least try a shot of whiskey. She never usually drank that, but he got her to agree. So we sat on the couch together and I gave her a proper glass and we urged her to drink up. She made the worst face when it was over and slammed the glass down.

"Oh God, that's disgusting! How can you drink that?" she wondered.

"I like it," I shrugged.

"Me too. It makes you all warm inside."

"I can't believe you're going to get drunk on a work night. You'll regret it in the morning," she chided both of us.

"Maybe we'll just call in sick?" Draco offered taking a swig.

"I'll know you're lying and just really hungover," she told us.

"So? Are you gonna tell on us?" Draco wondered.

"No."

"So then be quiet. You really do need to get laid. You're so uptight," Draco said, shaking his head.

He got smacked across the shoulder really hard for that comment.

"You presume to tell me that I need to get laid? It's none of your business if I do that or not!" she said angrily.

"Oh come on. Admit it. It's been too long hasn't it?" Draco wasn't giving up.

Hermione looked disgusted with him but then she just laughed and sat back into the cushions and covered her face.

"It really has been too long," she admitted.

"Knew it!"

"How long has it been for you?" she wondered curiously, and I wondered the same thing myself.

"Saturday night. Some chippie I met at a bar. Don't think I'm seeing her again any time soon. I don't even remember her name," Draco mused.

"You're a pig," Hermione informed him, and I had to agree.

But he was a pig I wanted to be with. Like I felt like I somehow could know the real him and not this façade he put on for everyone else. But maybe it wasn't really a façade? Maybe the pig was the real him? I wasn't sure.

"I am a pig, but I bet you'd enjoy rolling around in it once in a while," Draco teased Hermione playfully.

"Stop! I would not! You're gross," she made a face at him.

"You just don't want me because I'm not Potter. You fancy him?" Draco asked and Hermione and I both looked at each other with a look of horror on our faces. I don't think she wanted to answer the question and I didn't want her to. But eventually she did.

"I like Harry a lot. But he thinks we're suited as just friends, and I respect that about him."

"Have you two ever kissed each other? Like a real kiss?" Draco asked, no holds barred.

"No!" we both said quickly.

"So try it. It's just a kiss. It doesn't have to change anything."

"No, I don't want to," I told him quickly. But off Hermione's hurt expression I changed my mind. "I mean, I will if she wants me to."

"No, it's fine. It's obvious the idea makes you panic and want to vomit," she pouted.

"It's not that! It's just you're like a sister to me. You know that."

"I don't want to be a sister anymore, Harry."

"I know. But I think….I just think…." I stammered out without knowing what to really say.

"Just kiss me," she told me and she closed her eyes and leaned over Draco towards me and waited expectantly. So I did it. I kissed her. And it wasn't awful. It just wasn't that exciting. The most exciting part was that my hand was resting on Draco's thigh the entire time, and when the kiss ended, I didn't move my hand right away. But Hermione had a dreamy look in her eyes.

"That was a pretty good kiss. Don't you think?" she asked happily.

How could I disappoint her? I didn't know how. But I didn't want to lie and get her hopes up either.

"Hermione, I think I'm kinda gay." I blurted this out so unceremoniously and without warning that she didn't even know what hit her. She just sat there staring at me and giving me a look of confusion.

"Did you hear me?" I asked her again.

"I heard you. But since when? Did my kiss make you gay?" She asked with tears forming in her eyes. "Oh god, you're not really gay, you're just saying that because the kiss was so awful!"

"No, I really am. I think. I'm pretty sure. The answer isn't definitive yet," I tried to explain as best as I could.

"Since when though? You never answered me. You weren't gay before!" she said with tears in her eyes.

"I think I always have been. I just wasn't sure. I'm still not sure. I'm confused," I told her as gently as I could.

"And Draco? _He_ knows? You're just saying this in front of him like it's no big deal. You told _Draco Malfoy_ before you told _me_?" her tears were really falling now and I couldn't stop them.

"I'm sorry. It just sorta slipped out with him. I didn't mean to tell him first!"

"Does Ronald know?"

"No."

"So just Draco knew?"

"Yes."

"Why?" she shook her head and wiped her eyes, not understanding this at all.

"I don't know why," I shrugged.

"I know why. It's because I'm an outsider. I'm no one. It's easier to tell the person who you don't care what their reaction will be. That's why I was the privileged one. Don't feel bad. It just means he actually cares what you think," Draco explained for me, and he wasn't entirely wrong.

"God this explains so much. Like why you never go out and why your closet is always color coordinated and why you think of me as one of the guys even though I've got a nice set of tits I keep throwing at you and you keep ignoring them. I finally get it!" she started laughing and rubbing my arm affectionately.

"That's me. I wanted to tell you, I just didn't know how," I told her.

She leaned over Draco again and hugged me tightly.

"You could have just told me outright you were confused. I would have listened. And not kept tossing out hints that we should get together. God, I feel so stupid now! You must think I'm really stupid," she lamented sadly.

"No, not at all. If things were differently I _would_ want to be with you. I really would. It's just they're not different. And I sort of have a different type I'm looking for," I explained softly.

"Whole other type is right. Someone with a cock. And you'll just never be that person, despite the fact that I once told everyone in school you were a hermaphrodite," Draco chimed in with a sly grin.

"You what?" Hermione was livid.

"I told some people you were a hermaphrodite. It was extra funny because they didn't know what that word meant and I had to explain it to them. It was even better that way."

"You are a fuckwad. How could you tell people _that_? Ugh!"

"Relax, it was years ago. I don't think they remember. Or else they just don't care if you're packing heat in your knickers or not."

"I hate you. I really do. You are so annoying," Hermione told him.

"I know, but if not for me you'd still be pining away for Harry. I did you both a favor," he said.

I had to wonder if that was his real motivation. To do us a favor or was it to humiliate us both? I don't really know, and part of me doesn't care because it did feel good to get things out in the open with Hermione. But what was I supposed to do with these wayward feelings of lust I had for Draco? I still didn't really know where he stood in the midst of things. Except to be an antagonist.

Hermione wanted to talk endlessly about this new development in my life, but I'd already told her all I could tell her. I just wanted to be left alone with Draco to drink, but I didn't know how to tell her that. I'd already hurt her feelings once this night, I didn't want to do it again. But finally I had to put a stop to all the questions.

"Hermione, I love you. You know that. But for all that is good in this world, can you please stop talking? I've said all I want to say on the subject of my personal life. Can't we just drink and be merry?" I asked her.

She was taken aback momentarily and held her hands to her cheeks.

"I'm sorry. Am I being annoying by asking so many questions? It's just I have them all in my head and don't know what to do," she admitted sheepishly.

"Love, it's not rocket science. Your best friend is a raging homo and he's not going to marry you one day. End of discussion," Draco chimed in helpfully.

"Can we stop calling me a raging homo? I'm more like a smoldering pile of confused boners," I said raising my hand.

They both looked at me and erupted into laughter. Like the real kind of laughter where your belly aches and tears form in your eyes and you can't breathe. And I don't know that what I said was that funny, but it helped drain the tension out of the room. And it didn't hurt that they'd both been drinking whiskey shots the entire time. Even Hermione who hated the taste but somehow felt traumatized enough now to drink it. But she was laughing in this instance. And the next thing I knew she'd wrapped her arms around me in a hug and Draco grabbed us both and smooshed us together. It was a nice group hug experience and it wasn't lost on me that Draco felt the need to be a part of it. Except I couldn't tell who he was trying to cop a feel of. His hand was on my low back near my ass, but a quick glance over Hermione's shoulder showed his hand in the same position there. Maybe he wanted us both? Or neither of us? Or maybe I'd already drank too much? Soon enough, the experience was over and we were all sitting on the couch.

Hermione stood up and said she'd had enough to drink, and I expected Draco to leave. But when questioned by me if he was going, he patted me on the back and said no. He was there to drink with me and call in sick tomorrow. So I just sat back into the cushions next to him and we passed the bottle back and forth in silence for a while. Then I looked at him.

"Have you ever been confused?" I very boldly asked him, because I'd been dying to know.

He just shook his head slightly.

"Nah, I always know what I want."

"Have you ever wanted a guy?"

"Are you asking me on a date, Potter?" he snickered slightly and shoved my arm playfully.

"No! Just curious," I tried to save the situation without turning red.

"I'll be honest with you okay? No, I've never wanted a guy. However, if I found myself in a situation where that felt like the thing to do? Well, I'd do it. I'm secure enough in my manhood to say that because I don't think it'll ever happen. But I'm not gonna say never. I'm a very sexual person and if a guy wants to blow me or something? Maybe I'd let him," Draco shrugged and chugged the whiskey.

"So if some guy was just giving out blow jobs, you'd unzip?" I asked in confused awe.

"Maybe? A blowie is a blowie, am I right?" he laughed to himself.

"I guess. Except Ginny tried to give me one and I couldn't stay hard," I admitted with a small sigh.

Draco laughed again and I wondered if he'd ever heard of tact, but I don't think he has. I felt stupid yet again, but he just waved it away.

"You think too much, Potter. I'd just close my eyes and think of whatever I wanted to think about. Sod all else. It could be anyone sucking me off," he explained.

"But that sucks, pardon the pun. I mean, I would want the person I was doing that to, to be thinking of me. Not someone else," I protested.

"Well then don't give me a blowie then. Because I'll probably be thinking of Hermione. God, she's wound so tight I bet she'd really let loose in bed. Think she gives blowies or is she too prudish?" Draco wondered.

"Malfoy I have no idea. And she's my best friend. Can you stop talking so crudely about what you wanna do to her? I'd never let you near her now," I told him.

"I never said I wouldn't like her while it was going on. I have a deep interest in her as a person, not just a sex object," he said with something that almost sounded sincere, if I didn't know better.

"Liar. You just want in her pants."

"True. But I do like the girl. She's charming. And sometimes she's funny. I like her when she's not working, let's put it that way. Otherwise she's a drill sergeant."

"She is wound very tight. And when it comes to working, forget it. She's all business."

"Yeah, you could say that. Which is why I find her so fascinating when she does let loose. Like drinking whiskey and that dress she put on the other night? Hello sex kitten. I think she just needs a man like me to show her a good time."

I wish Draco would show me a good time. I couldn't help but be jealous of my own best friend. She had the one guy I wanted lusting after her and to him I was sort of a running joke. But he also said that he'd let me blow him, basically. If I got on my knees and unzipped I could have him. But then I'd know he was envisioning me as Hermione. I was trying to figure out if that bothered me as much as it should. But before I could get enough nerve to offer to give him a blowie, he stood up and said he needed the loo. I just sat back in defeat and wondered what Draco would do if I kissed him. He never said what he'd do if someone was giving out free kisses instead of free blow jobs. But I realized he'd probably just laugh at me some more, so I fiddled with a loose button on my shirt and waited for him to come back.

"So Potter, who is this guy you said you fancied? I know you didn't want to tell me, but I'm curious," Draco asked as he walked back in the room and plopping down practically on top of me on the couch.

"What? Oh. The guy. I'm still not telling you. I'm not even sure I actually like him. He's kind of a prat," I admitted.

"A prat eh? Where'd you meet him?"

"Work."

"Name?"

"Nameless."

"Nameless? Come on, just tell me!" he pleaded.

"No! Never. So don't ask again."

"You gonna blow him?"

"Maybe?"

"God really? I was just kidding," Draco laughed.

"Well you basically said men don't give up free blowies, so I might try that tactic," I shrugged.

"Yeah? I wish women were so easy. I'd get on my knees and service Hermione if I thought she wouldn't behead me for trying," Draco lamented.

I started laughing at the insane imagery, but I knew she probably wouldn't be that receptive to Draco climbing under her skirt uninvited.

"See, this is why men are better. They are easy. If I unzipped your pants right now, what would you do?" I asked drunkenly.

"I'd laugh for starters," he chuckled at me.

"Yeah, but then you said you'd go for it right?" I offered hopefully.

"Maybe," he shrugged.

"See, that's why I like men. Simplicity."

"Men are all whores is what you're saying," he asked with a raised eyebrow.

"I didn't say that! You did!"

"You're right, I did. Oops. I'm starting to forget stuff. Which is the best part of being drunk," he smiled at me.

"Are we friends, Draco?" I blurted out without thinking how pathetic it sounded.

He shoved me slightly and ruffled my already messy hair.

"Course we are. Except I'm not sure you like me," he laughed slightly.

"I'm not sure I do either, but I can tell you stuff. Secret stuff. I've never had someone I felt like that with," I admitted.

"Bollocks. What about Weasley?" Draco reminded me of my other best friend, whom I hadn't spoken to much lately.

"Ron is great. But some things are hard to tell him. Like all this stuff. But you make it easier."

"Well you're welcome. I didn't know you'd blurt out your biggest secrets to me, but it means something that you trust me. Even if I've never given you a reason to," he explained with some awkwardness.

"You have never given me a real reason to trust you, which is why it's so surprising that I do. But you're easy to talk to. Fun. I kind of sort of like you. As a friend! I feel the need to clarify that!" I tossed in to avoid this sounding like the love declaration it really was.

"Likewise, Potter. I like you too. God if my father heard me say that he'd kill me. But truth is, I always wanted to be your friend. You just blew me off and hated me, so I hated you right back. But I tried to be your friend. Remember the day we first met at the robe shop? I thought we were going to be best buds. Two Slytherin peas in a pod. But obviously that never happened," Draco said with the utmost sincerity and for once he wasn't goofing around.

"You really thought we'd be best buds?" I asked with surprise.

"Sure did."

"You didn't even know me."

"Didn't have to. You seemed nice and had good taste in robes, so I assumed you had money. And we were both new to Hogwarts. I just assumed we'd be fast friends. I didn't know you were the great Harry Potter until later."

"Well you shouldn't be too surprised we didn't end up friends when you basically introduced yourself to me by saying you hated everything about me and my friends and then offering a handshake," I laughed slightly.

Draco shoved me over playfully.

"Shut up. I was eleven. My delivery was a bit off."

"Yeah, well you kept getting worse. You were a real asshole. Like I truly hated you."

"And now?"

"Now, not so much. Sometimes I still hate you though."

"Sometimes I still hate you too, so we're even."

I just smiled at him. I didn't know what else to do. Except I wanted to kiss him. Really badly. But I had to hold myself back. I knew he'd probably freak and bolt if I did that. But it meant a lot to me that he could have a real conversation with me. Not just always joking or making fun of me Draco Malfoy admitted he wanted to be my friend. That was a shocking and amazing new development in my life. Now I knew it wasn't just that he was talking to me because I was there. He actually liked me. I felt like I could walk on clouds because of this.

"I think I've drank my fair share tonight. The room is spinning," Draco admitted after we had sat in silence for a while.

"Me too. It's definitely spinning. You gonna go home?" I asked.

"No. I mean, I will if you really want me to, but I sort of fancy crashing on your couch. Apparating doesn't sound fun right now. I might puke."

"Okay. You can stay here. Are you really playing hooky from work tomorrow?"

"Yes. Bloody hell, I'd never make it in like this," he chuckled.

"Me neither."

"We can hang out tomorrow. Just us guys. It'll be fun. I'll even let you paint my toenails," Draco laughed.

"You want your toenails painted? And you say I'm the gay one," I laughed right back.

"I was kidding obviously," he made a face at me.

"I know. Which is good since I don't know how to paint nails."

"Me neither."

"We could have a burping contest or something else manlier," I offered.

"Sounds good," he smiled at me.

And then we just sat there together and said nothing. His arm was around the back of the couch, semi around me, even if I knew that wasn't his intent. And our bodies were touching as we sat so close together. Draco was really warm and I wish I could have run my hands over that hot body, but that would be stretching the boundaries a little too much. But the next thing I realized, we had fallen asleep. When I woke, I was laying on his shoulder and my hands were in his lap. His head was tipped back and his mouth was open and he looked rather silly, but I thought he looked great still. That was always the sign of brain damaged love. I did notice that his hand was on my knee and his other hand was resting on top of my hand in his lap. It was quite a lovely scene actually. Until it got interrupted when Hermione came down the stairs and announced it was time for work.

"Rise and shine!" she said in a very loud overly cheerful voice.

"Oh fuck off," Draco mumbled as he stretched and tried to roll over and hide in the couch cushions.

"I think we're both staying home sick today," I told Hermione as I nestled down closer to Draco and tried to pretend it wasn't on purpose we were still snuggled together.

"You two are terrible. And Draco is on my last nerve because now I have to do all the work on our project alone. I wish I had an air horn to blow in his ear right now," she said huffily.

"No, please no air horn. I beg of you," I said imploringly.

"Fine. Enjoy snuggling with your new boyfriend; I'll see you later," she said as she came over and kissed my forehead and straightened my glasses on my face.

Draco was pretending to be asleep when she left, but he was really awake. Albeit, begrudgingly. But he looked up at me as I lay on top of him slightly and had my hands on his hip.

"Is she gone?" he asked me. I nodded and he let out a sigh of relief. " Good. I hope she doesn't turn me in. She wouldn't do that would she? I don't want to lose my job."

"Nah, she wouldn't turn you in. Even if she hates you."

"You better be right."

"I am. I know her really well. She likes to get mad at irresponsibility but she'd never tell on a friend."

"I'm not her friend though," Draco pointed out Hermione's obvious distaste for Draco on most days.

"I wouldn't worry. Trust me. She's just not like that."

"Good because I'm knackered. Did we really sleep sitting up all night? Fuck, my neck is killing me," he said, rubbing it with one hand.

"We did and yes my neck is sore too."

"I feel like I got run over," he admitted.

"Want me to rub your neck?" I offered boldly. Or at least it felt pretty bold considering my feelings.

He stared at me a minute then he just shrugged.

"Sure. A neck rub is like a blowie. You don't say no if someone is offering one for free," he laughed and winked at me.

The wink confused me. What did that mean? Maybe he just had something in his eye? I wasn't sure but I got to work rubbing his neck all nice and proper and I realized just how badly I wanted to run my hands through his hair. So I did. I ran a hand through his hair and laughed slightly.

"Your hair is messy," I told him casually.

He leaned over and ran his hand through my hair and it almost didn't make it out alive.

"Your hair is a disaster too, Potter."

Were we really running our hands through each other's hair? This felt like a dream, but it was really happening. I'd never wanted to kiss him more. But I refrained.

"Your hair is soft," I whispered playing with it.

"Yours is tangled," he chuckled, his hand getting caught in the mess.

Then it was as if he realized what we were doing and he yanked his hand away and sat up straighter.

"My neck feels better now, so it's cool. You can stop. But thanks," he stammered slightly.

"Oh. Okay. You're welcome."

"It's all good. I need to use the toilet," he announced and stood up to leave.

I just laid down on the couch, face first into the cushions, and cursed myself for running my hands through his hair. That was so awkward. Even he felt awkward. We both probably did. And it was my stupid fault. But it was getting harder to control myself around him. When he came back and I was still hiding in the cushions and didn't look up when he sat back down.

"You hiding from me?" he asked ruffling my hair playfully.

"No. I'm just hiding from myself. I'm really hungover," I explained to him.

"God, me too. I think we made a bad choice last night."

"I think I'm always making bad choices. No wonder they don't let me catch dark wizards by myself," I lamented. "I'd probably play with their hair or offer them a neck massage."

Draco laughed and patted my shoulder.

"It's alright, Potter. I didn't mind. And I played with your hair too. Couldn't resist seeing as how messy it is. I wanted to know if it felt all crunchy or if it was soft," he said trying to cheer me up.

"And? Which is it?" I wondered with a small grin plastered on my face.

"It's soft. But you could use a comb now and again. How are you gonna get anyone to fuck you if they have to look at that hair?" Draco teased.

"Check. Comb my hair better. Anything else?"

"Nah. Can't think of anything. You've got the adorable smile going for you. And some people dig the glasses. Or you could take them off?"

"But if I take them off, I can't see anything. Like at all. I'm blind as a bat."

"What about contacts?"

"I'm allergic."

"Damn. Well that's fine. Glasses can be hot. Maybe. Sort of. On the right person anyway," he told me, scrutinizing my face.

"Am I the right person?" I wondered as I gulped audibly and waited for a kiss I knew was never happening.

"Let's just say you pull it off," Draco smiled and then he shook his head and took a deep breath. "Alright, so got any food? I'm nauseous but hungry, so I need toast. Toast me up. Unless you'd rather go out to breakfast?" He changed the subject, which I was both grateful for and annoyed by. But it was what it was.

"I've got bread here, but it might be moldy. We'd be better off at a coffee shop."

"Alright. Let's go."

I wanted to change my clothes or brush my teeth or run a comb through my hair, but Draco was adamant about leaving as soon as possible. He gets cranky when he's hungry. Which I added to a mental list of things I was learning about him lately. But the next thing I knew, we were at a coffee shop in the city, sipping coffee and eating toast and eggs together.

"Who would have thunk this huh?" he asked as he spread jam on his toast.

"Thunk what?" I wondered.

"This. Us two. Buddies. Like for real. Life is so weird."

"Oh, yeah. Totally weird. I never would have imagined this either." Or that I'd be falling in love with him. Or at least that's what I thought was happening. Much to my chagrin.

"I think I'm gonna make it my life's mission to get you laid, right and proper. It's what a friend would do, right? I mean, you cannot be a 21 year old virgin. Not in my presence," Draco announced.

"It's not _that_ old. Or pathetic. Lots of people wait these days," I said defensively.

"No they don't wait. Only the really ugly or really religious people are virgins at 21."

"That's not true."

"Yes it is. And even ugly people find other ugly people to shag. So really it's just you and the holy rollers."

"How are you gonna find me someone to shag?" I asked with amusement at how easy he tried to make it sound.

"I don't know. But I will. We could find a gay bar! That's a perfect place," he said triumphantly.

"I don't know any gay bars. Do you?"

"No, but I could find out. It's not that hard. We'll find a bar and then you'll meet some bloke and just go for it. You don't even need to like him really. That's what I do. I just take a person home for a few hours and then bang it out and be done with it."

"That's kind of on the empty side. I'm looking for something meaningful," I explained as I sipped my coffee.

"Fuck meaningful. At least right now. You're in a crisis situation. You just need to get boned. There's plenty of time for lovey dovey magical shit. Now you just need a good dicking even more than Hermione does."

"Will you stop saying that word? It's gross and stupid," I laughed, with my face turning red.

"Well what do you want me to call it?" he wondered with a raised eyebrow.

"Anything but that!"

"Okay, you need your ass pounded like a prison movie. And I'm gonna help you do it," he smiled broadly.

"Oh yeah, that's a much better way of putting it. Thanks. God, why do you care so much or not if I get laid?" I asked curiously.

"Because I'm your mate. And I don't want you to be pathetic. Or lonely. Or hard up. I want you to be happy. And trust me, nothing makes a bloke happier than getting laid," Draco explained sincerely.

"Well thanks. It's nice of you to care," I said, trying not to give away how touched I really was that Draco cared so much.

"It's not a problem. It's what friends are for. And I've never played matchmaker for two blokes before. It's new territory. But I think it's gonna be easier than finding you a bird. With females you usually gotta at least pretend you want more than a fuck. But men are cretins."

"I'm not a cretin."

"Well most men are. Trust me. I'm one," he laughed and raised his coffee cup to me.

I raised mine back and clinked cups with him.

"To cretins! May they help me get laid," I said with a big grin.

"Exactly." Draco smiled at me too.

"So what about your other mates? Do they know you're friends with me? I'd imagine they'd give you shit for it," I asked curiously.

"Them? Oh who cares. But yeah, they'd give me shit for sure. But I don't care. It's my life. And I can be friends with whomever I choose," he said dismissively. "What about Weasley? God he fucking detests me. What would he say?"

"He'd probably have me committed to St. Mungo's. Which is why I'm not telling him."

"We're secret friends. I kinda like that. Clandestine meetings, gay bars, sleeping on your couch together. It's all very hush hush and exciting," he said with a chuckle.

"Weird things make you happy, you know that?" I told him.

"I know."

"I like that about you."

"I like that you like it."

And with that I just stared at him and couldn't take my eyes off him. He was so fucking cute. I mean, cute sounds so trite and juvenile but I didn't know a better word. He was sexy as hell and I just wanted to rip off all his clothes. I claimed to be confused about my sexuality, and it was true most of the time. But not when I looked at Draco. When I looked at him, I knew damn well which way my door swung. And I wanted to shout to the world that I was gay and in lust with Draco Malfoy. Except I don't know how well that would have gone over with him. Or anyone else. But that's how I felt. And I still wasn't convinced Draco was 100% straight. He kept making comments or doing things or touching me. You name it. He was doing it. And it was confusing. But it was the _only_ thing confusing about him. When it came to my feelings, I was clear as a bell about what and who I wanted. And that was Draco Malfoy. God help me.

To be continued….


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer:** I own none of the characters here. JK Rowling and company own them. I merely play with them for my own amusement. Please don't sue. I have nothing of value anyway.

 **Summary:** Harry is caught in a love triangle to rival all else. He's found himself questioning his sexuality and is owning up to his attraction to Draco Malfoy. Meanwhile Draco is cozying up to Hermione, who won't give him the time of day. And Hermione keeps thinking there's hope for her and Harry to have a future together. It's a tangled web of emotions and will anyone get what they want? Set a couple of years after Hogwarts ended. Told from Harry's POV. Drarry. With talk of Harmony and Dramione.

 **Three is a Crowd**

The next few days were interesting to say the least. Draco kept showing up at my house with Hermione to do their work project, and I kept trying to interject myself into their space without it seeming so obvious I was trying to be near Draco. It was starting to annoy Hermione because inevitably Draco and I would end up talking and laughing and she would be working until she'd finally give up for the evening. The only problem was, the work project was almost done. This meant Draco wouldn't have a reason to come over to my house anymore. Not unless it was expressly to see me and I wasn't sure if he'd do it or not. I thought maybe it was just a friendship of convenience. And I not so slyly asked him about this one night. The two of them had finished working and Hermione went upstairs to read while Draco and I sat on the couch in the dark and watched the telly. Only I wasn't really paying attention to it and neither was he really. We were sitting close together and it took all I had not to reach over and hold his hand. But I didn't. I just blurted out my fears to him unceremoniously.

"When this work project ends, am I gonna see you again?" I asked looking at my hands in my lap.

"What? Of course you will. Why would you ask me that?" he wondered.

I shrugged. "I dunno. I figured you'd have other places to be."

"Bollocks. I mean sure, I do have other things to do. But that doesn't mean I'm never coming around here. I'm still working on Hermione. You realize she hasn't yelled at me for a couple of days. I'm making headway. And then there's you. I promised to get you laid at the gay bar. I did some research so I hope you're ready to go out tomorrow night," he smiled at me.

"Really? We're going out?" I asked with much more excitement than I wanted to show.

"Yes. I promised. Should we take Hermione? It might do well to have a woman's opinion and I might get somewhere with her if she's there," he said with a wistful smile.

"No, I'd rather not take her. She asks me too many questions. And she's picky. And I'd rather it was just us."

"Okay. It's your call. I'll have to work my magic on her later."

"I don't think you're going to get her, Draco. She might not have yelled at you lately, but she doesn't like you," I told him truthfully.

"No one likes me at first. I'm like an acquired taste. She'll come around and taste it. Mark my words," he laughed confidently.

"We'll see. I'm kind of nervous. What is this bar like?"

"Fuck if I know. I asked a bloke I knew from work where gays liked to hang out. He's one of them, you know? But don't worry, I didn't set you up with him because he's already got a boyfriend. But he told me this place. He said it's all the rage. How bad could it really be?" Draco shrugged.

"You're not embarrassed to go there?" I asked curiously.

"No. I don't care. Now if my father finds out, I'm a dead man. But I'm not telling him, are you?" Draco chuckled.

"No, really not telling him. Thanks for doing this for me. I appreciate it," I said sincerely.

"No worries. I just hope you find someone. This guy I know said it's really like shooting fish in a bowl. The men are all really horny and willing. Shouldn't be too difficult to find a bloke."

Just the thought of being with some other guy besides Draco made me very nervous. And not excited like I thought I'd be. If I really was gay, shouldn't I be more excited at the prospect of finally getting laid? But then again, it was really Draco I wanted and I wasn't having him. Maybe I'm just gay for him? Is that a thing? Can you be straight normally and gay for one person only? Is there a protocol for something like this? I'm not sure. But I'd give it a good try and see what I thought. Maybe I could be happy with some random guy? I was willing to find out.

When the time came for our outing, Hermione was bugging me about where I was going.

"I don't understand why I can't come. I'm going to be bored at home alone," she said sadly.

"Don't be like that. Don't pout. It's a guy's night. You have girls nights. I'm not allowed on those," I explained.

"Yeah but everyone I know is busy with their boyfriends. I don't have one. I'm sick of being single, Harry. You shattered my dreams when you told me you were gay," she sighed.

"I didn't mean to. But even if you're sick of being single you won't find an eligible man at this bar. It's a _gay_ bar. Why would you want to go?" I asked her.

"At least I'd be doing something."

"We'll go out tomorrow night maybe? Just us. Promise. It'll be fun. But tonight Draco is showing me a whole new world or some such shit."

"Fine. I don't see why you like him so much. I thought we both hated him. And now he's like your new best friend. I don't get it," Hermione pouted.

"He's nice now. I don't know. I just think he's cool," I shrugged.

"He keeps asking me out. I don't get it. He called me a filthy little mudblood my whole life and now he wants to shag me. Does he think I'm gonna forget what he said before? And you shouldn't forget either! Traitor," she stuck her tongue out at me.

"I'm sorry. If it really bothers you I won't go out with him," I said, praying she wouldn't make me adhere to that because I really wanted to go. But she didn't. She shook her head.

"No, go. But we better go someplace tomorrow. You promised. I'll hex you if you back out on me."

"Gotcha. Now I need to get going. I'm meeting Draco at his flat. I love you, Hermione," I said giving her a kiss on the cheek.

"Yeah, yeah. Go be gay. I love you too, Harry," she waved me away.

And with that, I took off to Draco's. I'd never been to his flat and I was just relieved he didn't still live at the Manor. I didn't fancy seeing his folks. Especially dear old Dad. But Draco said he would never give up his freedom to live at home like they wanted. I noticed his house was really quaint and nice and had a lot of property. I went to the door and knocked and it magically opened and I walked inside. No one was there though.

"Uh, Draco?" I called out.

"In the bedroom! Make yourself at home on the couch. I'll be right out," he called from somewhere in the back of the house.

I noticed how modern and sleek all the furniture was and how nice everything was put together. It was all done in black and silver with green accents, which I presumed were leftover Slytherin pride mementos. I sat down on the black leather couch and waited nervously. I had no idea what to expect from this evening. And really I just wanted to be with Draco and no one else. But I couldn't tell him that. I had to pretend I was eager to meet someone new. But part of me kept hoping that everyone would think we were a couple and leave us alone. Would he dance with me too? How far was he willing to take this friendship thing at a gay bar? I was eager to find out.

Just then he emerged from the bedroom wearing a black suit with a white shirt and no tie. The shirt was opened up a few buttons and he had black loafers on his feet. His bed head was even sexier than normal. And I felt incredibly underdressed in my jeans and t-shirt.

"Wow, you look great," I said with awe as I stood to greet him.

"And you look utterly ordinary. A t-shirt? Come on Harry. You could do better than that!" he scolded me.

"I'm sorry! You didn't say how to dress! And normally this is what I wear to a bar," I said defensively.

"No wonder you never get laid. It's okay though. We'll work around it. It's sort of a dorky look which suits you. At least your shoes are alright. Not as nice as mine, but workable."

"Who cares about shoes anyway?"

"Gay men do."

"Well then maybe you're more gay than me?" I offered with a raised eyebrow.

"Ha-ha. Come on. Let's get going. It's about the perfect time to arrive because it's not too early. You wanna hold onto my arm?" he offered it to me and I took it, and he apparated us out of his flat and into an alley by the nightclub.

The place was called Demigods and had a line of people waiting to get inside. They were all men and some of them were holding hands or cuddling and I just didn't know what to do with my eyes. I wanted to stare at them, not because I thought it was weird, but because it was something I'd rarely seen and wanted to see more of. They were all so free with themselves and not shy or nervous. But a lot of them were dressed like Draco and I felt out of place. But Draco draped his arm around my shoulder and shoved us up to the front of the line. He pulled out a wad of Muggle cash and handed it to the bouncer. He let us in right away. There were definite perks to hanging out with someone who was rich.

Once inside, he took his arm off me and we sat at a booth and ordered drinks from a man wearing nothing but a Speedo.

"So what did you think of the waiter guy?" Draco asked, leaning back in the booth and playing with a toothpick between his teeth.

"I thought he looked cold. He's practically naked," I said naively.

"Yeah, but was he hot? Did he stir up any longings?" Draco wondered.

"I don't know."

"No worries. He's just the help anyway. You need to focus on a patron. Like what about that bloke in the corner in the red shirt?" Draco discreetly pointed to a brunet man who looked to be about our age and he was tall and lanky.

There was nothing wrong with the guy, but he wasn't Draco. I shrugged and told Draco I liked blonds. He smirked slightly and scanned the crowd for another blond such as himself.

"How about him?" he asked me.

"Maybe?"

"Go buy him a drink!"

"What? No. I haven't even gotten my own drink yet."

"Fine, once you get yours, go buy him one. That's how this shit works."

"I know. I'm not daft. I just don't feel ready to race over to the first guy I see and start sucking his dick, okay?" I said slightly irritated, mostly because I didn't really want to meet anyone else other than who I was with already.

"Okay, okay. Chill out. I'm trying to help," Draco held up his hands.

"I know. I'm sorry. I'm just nervous, is all. Ignore me," I apologized.

Just then my drink arrived and I couldn't help but down it and order another immediately. I told the waiter to keep them coming and Draco just laughed at me. But I was seriously in need of being shit faced to survive this night. Once I was properly on my way to shit faced town, I decided I wanted to dance.

"Come on, dance with me," I urged Draco.

"Go dance with someone else. That's the whole point of this night," he explained getting exasperated with me.

"I know. But I'd feel better if you danced with me first and then maybe I'll ask another person after."

"Fine. The things I do for you. You better not ever say I'm not a good friend."

We got up and headed to the dance floor and I happily got what I wanted, which was Draco's company. But it's not as if he was dancing all sexy with me. He was just dancing. Mostly by himself with me just happening to be next to him. And he was a way better dancer than me. So much so, no one paid much attention to me and everyone stared at him. Including me. But he saw the situation and promptly grabbed my arm and made me dance with him, so that somehow his coolness could rub off on me. So there we were, rubbing against each other, moving to the music and his hands were running down my arms and I felt my pants get tight and I prayed no one could see the amazing boner I had hidden in my pants. Now I wouldn't say the dance was sexy, but it was definitely not friendly. Only it sadly didn't last long enough because the music changed to a slow song and Draco apparently didn't like me enough to dance slow with me. We exited the floor and he urged me to ask someone else to dance. I couldn't. I literally couldn't. It's like my tongue was numb and my feet were made of lead. And all I could do was drink my drink and stare at the beautiful blond man in front of me who had no idea I was in love with him.

"You know, if you don't go talk to a bloke soon, I'm gonna force feed one to you. It's been over an hour and you've not said a word to anyone but me," Draco informed me.

"I'm not drunk enough yet," I protested, and it wasn't a lie. I'd need to be a lot more drunk to meet some strange guy.

But Draco was having none of that. He stood up and marched over to a guy with sandy blond hair and who was a little on the shorter side. He had long sideburns and light blue eyes. Draco said something to him and the guy laughed and the next thing I knew he was walking over to me. I was horrified. Why would he do that? I wanted to crawl under the table but it wasn't happening. The next thing I knew the guy was with Draco at our table.

"Hello," he said politely to me and held out his hand.

I took it and shook it lightly and gave Draco a hard glare.

"So this is Dave, Harry. Harry, Dave. I'm going to get a drink but you two enjoy yourselves."

And with that he was just gone. He disappeared into the crowd and I was left alone with this Dave person. I had no idea what to do.

"So, Harry, your friend said it's your first time here at the bar," Dave said making conversation.

"Yes, yes it is. I'm not sure why I even came really. It's not my style," I said dismissively.

"Well what is your style?"

"I don't know. But not this," I told him.

"Why don't you just relax a little. We can just talk," Dave told me.

Talking. Talking was good. Talking was acceptable. I could _talk_ to the guy, but that's about all I could do. We proceeded to sip our drinks and he made small talk with me. Since this was a Muggle establishment I couldn't tell him the truth when he asked me what I did for a living so I said I was in insurance. I shouldn't have said that because I instantly became 100% more boring to the guy. But in all fairness, he worked construction. That's not exciting either. But we had literally nothing in common except we both liked men and when he asked me if I wanted to go back to his car and hook up, I panicked and told him I couldn't possibly leave Draco. They guy then wondered if he was my boyfriend and I said yes. I wasn't exactly thinking clearly because why would my boyfriend be fixing me up with other blokes? But I think that good ole' Dave got the message that I wasn't interested.

When he walked away defeated, Draco came back and asked me what gave. I told him I accidentally said he was my boyfriend, and he started laughing at me and said I was hopeless. I just don't think the bar scene is for me and I told Draco as much.

"So you really aren't having fun here?" he wondered as we stood outside the club, he with a cigarette in one hand and I with my drink clutched tightly to my chest.

"No, I don't really think it's for me. I-I don't want to be with someone I don't know." I admitted.

"You sure you don't even want to kiss anyone?" Draco asked as he crushed out his cigarette and flung it away.

"I just want to go home, I think."

"Suit yourself. You're missing out. I was asked out at least seven times and I wasn't even there for me," Draco grinned at me.

"Yeah, well, you're you. You'd get asked out anywhere. Besides I did get offered a blowie in a car, but I said no. Not sure if I was to give or receive though. But the offer was there," I chimed in.

Draco ruffled my hair and put his arm around my shoulder affectionately.

"You're pathetic. But come on, let's get out of here."

He led me away from the place and back to the secluded alley where we apparated to get there. We left just as quickly as we arrived and soon we were standing back in Draco's flat again. I kind of assumed he'd take me home. But this was even better. I liked his place. It was full of things that smelled like him. I wasn't sure what the smell was, but I liked it. It could have been cologne or shampoo or both. But it smelled like a coconut island mixed with something spicy and musky. I wonder what I smelled like to him? When he caught me smelling a pillow on the couch he asked me what I was doing.

"Oh sorry. It's just that something smells good in here. I thought maybe it was your couch pillow," I yammered with my face turning red.

"You're so strange, Potter. But thanks. Glad it doesn't smell like a dung heap in here. I'm not always the best housekeeper, but I knew you were coming over," he admitted with a small grin.

"Hermione does most of our housekeeping. The house smells like bleach and fabric softener most days."

"That's fascinating. Look are you gonna stay and drink with me or go home? Because the night is still young and I might go out again if you're not going to stay," he said brusquely and I wondered if I'd really made him angry by not being receptive to the guys at the club.

"I can leave if you want me to," I said softly.

"Potter, I never said I wanted you to leave, I just wanted to make plans. Obviously the plans I made went up in smoke, but I'd like to continue to have fun," he explained.

"I'll stay then. It'll be way more fun with just the two of us anyway," I said trying not to give away my excitement at having him all to myself.

"I'll put on music and get another bottle of whiskey. Make yourself at home."

He disappeared into the kitchen after he switched on the stereo and I just sat down on the couch and put my feet up. Then I took them down because I didn't want to wreck the coffee table. I was afraid of making any wrong moves really. But Draco came back before too long and brought more whiskey. I kind of already had enough, but Draco liked to drink a lot. And there was something attractive about that. I didn't even mind the cigarette stench that was on his clothes because it was so faint and so him. I liked it. He sat down next to me and we both sipped our drinks in silence for a while. Then Draco finally spoke.

"So what gives, Potter? I tried to set you up tonight and you just ruined it all. What's your problem?"

"I-I don't know. I'm nervous for one. And two, there's that guy I mentioned to you. The one I liked? Well I keep thinking of him," I said honestly.

"Well why can't you go be with him then? It's obvious that's who you want."

"I don't know if he likes me that way or not. Like I said, I think he might be ultra-straight, except he keeps doing and saying certain things which confuse me. I don't know what to make of it."

"Maybe you just need to be upfront about it with him? Tell him you want him and see how he responds," Draco told me.

I thought long and hard about what he'd just told me to do, and I wondered if I could do it or not. But there was something very scary about blurting out the truth like that. What if he wasn't receptive and didn't want to see me again because of it? I would be heartbroken to never see him again. Which I know sounds really girly and lame, but it's true. This brute of a man has a piece of my heart and I'm not eager to have it shattered into a million pieces yet. Or ever, if possible.

"I don't think I can just tell him. It'd be too awkward," I finally said after a long pause.

"Maybe you should just try and seduce him and see if it works?" Draco offered.

"Yeah right. I don't know how to seduce anyone," I admitted with a slight snort at the notion of me trying to be smooth enough to seduce someone like Draco.

"You overthink everything, Harry. Listen I'll show you how to do it. It's easy. Seduction is my specialty," he grinned broadly.

"Right, and you're in bed with Hermione right now because you're so good at it huh?" I ribbed him.

"Shut up. She's a special case. Normally my techniques are highly rated. But if you don't want my help…" he held up his hands.

"No! I do! I want it. What do I have to do?" I asked nervously.

"Okay, so you're going to be the other guy and I'm going to be you," Draco explained.

"Alright. So what I do?"

"Just shut up and sit there and I'll explain as I go," he said gruffly.

"Okay."

Draco sat there and took a big gulp of his whiskey, then he rolled his neck and stretched his arms and made funny faces and I had no idea what the hell he was doing, except I think he was getting in character. He even messed up his already sexy hair to look more like mine and then he grabbed my glasses off my face and put them on.

"Alright, so I'm you. And by the way, I cannot see a fucking thing with these glasses," he said as he took them off and handed them back. "We'll improvise without the glasses."

"Good because I couldn't see either," I admitted.

"Okay be quiet. I'm you. And you're this hunky nameless guy. So I say, 'want a drink?'"

"I already have a drink."

"No, you're supposed to say yes! Pretend you don't already have one," Draco said with exasperation.

"Oh, okay. Yes, I'd like a drink."

"Perfect. Here you go," Draco handed me my own glass and waited for me to take a drink. I put it down and he scooted over closer to me. "Drink more, I have plenty," Draco told me.

I took another drink and set it down. Then Draco ran his hand down my arm and played with the little hairs on the back of my hand.

"So, tell me about yourself."

"You already know everything about me," I said not keeping in character as I was too preoccupied with his fingers brushing over my hand.

"Potter pretend I don't know it all. God, you'd be a terrible actor," Draco sighed.

"Sorry. Okay. Um, well I'm an Auror in training. Wait, are you a Muggle?" I wondered.

"No. You said this guy was from work didn't you?" Draco looked confused.

"Oh yeah, right. He is. I forgot who I was supposed to be again. It was harder tonight because they were Muggles and apparently my fake job was boring," I rambled on as Draco continued to play with the hairs on my arm to the point it almost tickled. It was very distracting.

"Okay look, you're an Auror in training. That's fascinating. What do you do for fun?" Draco tried to get back in character.

"I, um, I play chess. And sometimes go for walks and read. But I don't read that much because I fall asleep doing it," I said honestly.

"You fall asleep reading? That's cute. I bet you look adorable," he said as he ruffled my hair and rested his hand on my shoulder.

I wanted to kiss him so badly, but then I remembered he was just acting like he was interested in me. But this was really hard to do.

"I bet you'd look adorable too when you sleep," I tossed out boldly.

"Hmm, you think so? Maybe someday you'll get to see me in bed. Sleeping that is," Draco added with a laugh and he ran his hand over the side of my cheek before resting it back on the crook of my neck.

I just stared at him and didn't know what to say or how to respond. I glanced down at his lap and I swear he had a hard on, but I could have been feverishly imagining it. I gulped and looked back up at his face and he leaned over to me really close.

"Do you want to kiss me?" he whispered almost inaudibly, but I could feel his lips tremble against my ear.

I simply nodded my head and Draco leaned over closer and closer and closer and then he stopped right before he got to my lips and then he sat back and put his arms over his head.

"See how easy that was? I had you wanting to kiss me in five seconds flat. Am I right?" he asked proudly.

Shit. Shit on a fucking shingle. He was just _acting_! I knew this. I knew it! But I claim temporary insanity. He was so close to kissing me. For real. I thought he would. And what about the boner in his pants that might or might not be there? Did he want me too? Or was it really just all an act? I was so deflated I didn't know what to do except just sit there and stare at him.

"What? Why are you looking at me like that?" Draco asked finally.

"No reason. Sorry. I guess you're right. It is easy. At least _you_ make it seem easy. I-I don't know if I could be as smooth as you," I admitted finally.

"You'll get the hang of it," he said shoving me playfully and then he picked up his drink and downed it. "I'm gonna change this music."

He got up and I did see him discreetly adjust his trousers and I smiled to myself. I, Harry Potter, had indeed given Draco Malfoy a boner. I didn't imagine it. But Draco wasn't telling me to suck it or anything. Instead he was fiddling with the stereo and keeping his back to me. I didn't mind. The view was great. But I would have liked to have seen what was in those trousers even more. But I just sat back and smirked to myself at my little known powers of seduction. I didn't have to do anything except be myself and Draco wanted me. Sort of. Maybe. His cock liked something it saw at least. Right? But when were cocks ever reliable? Mine sometimes got hard for no reason at all. It didn't even have to be related to sex. What if this was just an inconvenient boner that meant nothing? I was overthinking it again, just like he said I always did. I should just be happy.

When Draco came back and sat down again he leaned his back against me and put his feet up over the side of the couch. He laid his head back onto my shoulder and closed his eyes.

"I love this song," he murmured and I just nodded in agreement.

"Hermione likes this song too," I chimed in, unsure of what to say.

"Really? Cool. I'll have to remember that for next time I see her. Something in common helps," he grinned.

Shit. I wasn't trying to set them up! Damn my stupid mouth speaking before my brain has a chance to think.

"I don't think she likes it that much. I dunno. Probably not worth basing a relationship on," I muttered.

"I know that, dumbass. But it gives me something to say to her. You really think she'll never like me?" he asked leaning harder back against me and closing his eyes again.

"Pretty sure she hates you."

"Fuck. Why? I mean, I've got a checkered past but I'm a decent bloke now, aren't I?" he wondered.

"You are. I think you are. But she's less forgiving."

"I'm not gonna give up. Not yet. There might be hope."

I didn't really want to encourage this so I said nothing. I just took a bold move and leaned my head over and rested it on top of Draco's head. It felt so nice to be that close to him. Until he asked me what I was doing.

"Uh, nothing. I just was comforting you because Hermione doesn't like you," I stammered out as I removed my head from its position.

"Oh. Well, don't panic or anything. You can put it back. It felt nice. I just didn't know what you meant by it," he said grabbing my head and forcefully putting it back on top of his again.

I couldn't help but laugh slightly. Draco was so weird sometimes. But there was just no way in hell he could be totally straight. He was at least bisexual. He had to be. Ron and I never cuddled on couches or laid our heads together. That just would never happen. And Ron would never get a surprising boner while hanging out with me either. We'd been friends for a decade and it had never once happened. But with Draco it was different. Everything was different.

"So you really think if I make a bit of small talk with my mystery guy, he'll let me kiss him?" I asked softly as I lay my head on Draco.

"If he's the right bloke, yes. It'll work."

"What if I'm a bad kisser?" I asked curiously. My feeble attempts at kissing in the past weren't very noteworthy.

"I'm sure you'd be good. Why wouldn't you be?" he chuckled softly.

"Not enough practice," I shrugged.

"Hermione liked your kiss," he pointed out to me.

"True. She did, huh?" I'd forgotten he made us kiss and that she'd been dreamy over it. Mostly I was just trying to see if Draco would teach me how to kiss. It was a lame attempt I know, but desperate men do desperate things.

"Don't worry. You'll do fine. I have confidence in you."

"Really?"

He moved his position and sat up and looked me straight in the eyes as he grabbed my face and held it.

"You are the great Harry Potter. Savior to the Wizarding World. A damn fine wizard and amazing friend and not so bad to look at it. You've got it all, Potter. Don't sell yourself short. Believe in yourself because I believe in you," he said with more sincerity than I'd ever once heard from him in his entire life. He nearly made me cry. But I blinked back the tears that were forming and just stared at him.

"I didn't know you felt that way," I managed to say finally.

He let go of my face and let his hands drop down to his sides.

"Yeah, don't go spreading it around. I have a reputation to protect. But yeah, I feel that way. Without you, I'd be dead probably. Or worse. A Death Eater forever against my will. You saved everyone, including me. You should be more big headed and confident instead of this mousy little nerd who's scared to even tell a guy how he feels."

"It's not that easy! And I'm not a mousy nerd! I just did what had to be done. I don't think it was that special," I said with a shrug.

"Bollocks! It was fucking amazing. And you'd do well to not be so humble. I'm not saying you have to run around expecting people to adore you like royalty, but you could lose the dorky attitude like you're not good enough."

"I never really thought I was good enough," I admitted.

Draco just stared at me with his mouth open like he didn't know what to say to me. Then he finally shook his head and lowered his gaze away from me.

"You really are just a bonafide hero type, aren't you? You never did it for praise or bragging rights. You just did it because someone had to," he said softly, taking my hands and rubbing them, then dropping them again just as quickly.

"I didn't do it because _someone_ had to. I did it because _I_ had to. It couldn't be anyone else but me. That's why I don't feel like I did anything heroic. I had no choice," I explained quietly.

"I would have run. Chicken shit like me, I would have run. And kept running forever," Draco said with some slight bitterness at himself.

"No you wouldn't have. You didn't run when Voldemort had your family held hostage. You could have just never gone back there. But you stayed with them."

"Right. Yeah. I also ran off with them at the end of the battle and left you hero types in the dust. I fucking ran away with Mummy and Daddy first chance I got. Trust me Harry, I'm no hero. Never could be. Never will be."

"I don't care about that. I think we all did what we had to do in the war. Some of us just had shittier choices than the rest. And you and I both got the shaft," I said, touching his arm affectionately.

He looked at me and smiled slightly. Then he ruffled my hair, which he seemed to love to do.

"You can say that again. Our lives both sucked. But now they don't. So I say we both just forget that shit and move on, right?" he told me.

"Yeah, right. Totally."

"You're a good friend Harry. I'm sorry we spent so many years hating each other. I thought you were a wanker, but you're actually pretty fucking cool," Draco grinned at me.

"Thanks a lot. You were the wanker, not me. But you're not so bad now. I sometimes kind of like you," I grinned right back.

I didn't know what was happening between us, or what might happen between us, but we were definitely coming out of this as friends. I didn't want to screw that up, but at the same time I wanted so much more. So, so much more. But I could wait. I had time. And maybe one day Draco would profess his undying love for me? A guy can dream. And right now, that's enough for me.

To be continued….


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer:** I own none of the characters here. JK Rowling and company own them. I merely play with them for my own amusement. Please don't sue. I have nothing of value anyway.

 **Summary:** Harry is caught in a love triangle to rival all else. He's found himself questioning his sexuality and is owning up to his attraction to Draco Malfoy. Meanwhile Draco is cozying up to Hermione, who won't give him the time of day. And Hermione keeps thinking there's hope for her and Harry to have a future together. It's a tangled web of emotions and will anyone get what they want? Set a couple of years after Hogwarts ended. Told from Harry's POV. Drarry. With talk of Harmony and Dramione.

 **Three is a Crowd**

The next couple of weeks floated past me and I was on an extreme high from the time I spent with Draco. We hadn't done anything else really, but he kept wanting my company and I kept giving it. It was win-win for both of us. But I still wasn't secure in what he wanted from me. We'd be very affectionate without crossing lines, and I wanted so badly to just cross the line already! But Draco would always stop it and pull back the reigns like he was keeping a prized quarter horse at bay. And I was getting tired of being reeled in. But what was I supposed to do? I couldn't act before I really knew how he felt. And he wasn't giving anything away. Except for today. And it wasn't at all what I was expecting from him. It was a huge red warning flag for me to get my head out of my ass and stop dreaming of him. He asked Hermione out and she said yes. _Yes_! Can you fucking believe it? To say I was none too pleased with either of them would be putting it mildly. But in their defense they didn't know how I felt. To them, they were just doing whatever it was regular people did, like go on dates with people they fancied. Only I wondered when Hermione started fancying Draco. And I asked her as much.

"So how long have you wanted to shag him huh?" I asked in a snippy tone as she was getting ready to go out with my beloved.

"Harry, I'm not shagging him. It's a date. I finally got tired of him asking me and figured, what the hell? He's not so bad and frankly without the prospect of you and I getting together on the horizon, I figured why not?" she explained as she pulled on her heels and stood in front of the mirror.

"I don't want you to go," I pouted. This was a disaster.

"Why not? I thought you and Draco were like best friends these days," she sighed.

"We are. Kind of. Except he didn't tell me this," I lamented.

"I asked him not to. I wanted to tell you. But I didn't think you'd care that much."

"Well I do."

"Well please get over it because I want to have a little fun. I never do! Just let me have some fun. It's not like you want me," she tossed in with a slightly snide attitude in her voice.

"That's a low blow, Hermione," I said, addressing her comment about me not wanting her.

"It's true though. I realize it's not your fault entirely, but I waited for you for months. Years actually. And now you say you're gay or something. But part of me thinks you're just afraid of women. You always have been. And I want to be with someone who's not afraid of them," she snapped back at me.

What she was saying wasn't really fair. My mixed up lust for the male species wasn't my fault. But she did have a point that women scared me. They did. A lot. Hermione especially sometimes because she was so bold and honest and no holds barred. She never sugar coated anything with me, and she wasn't going to start doing it now.

"Fine. Go be with Draco. Just be careful okay? He's a player," I said truthfully. He played me like a fiddle and now it was Hermione's turn.

"I won't get played."

"Yeah right," I muttered under my breath.

"What?"

"Nothing. I'm going for a walk. I'll see you later," I said quickly and practically took off running out the door.

I just needed air. And I wasn't sure what I was more upset over. Hermione telling me I was afraid of women, or Draco somehow betraying me by taking out my best friend. But then I realized no one betrayed me because Draco was my friend too. That's it. They were both my fucking friends and instead of being happy for them, I was angry at them both. I wanted Draco to acknowledge we had something more going on, and I wanted Hermione to be quiet about my fear of women. I wanted to prove to her that I wasn't afraid of them, that I was really gay. It wasn't a copout. I was so upset I didn't know what to do. What if Draco and Hermione fell in love and got married? I'd throw myself off a bridge, I think. I just couldn't fathom the two of them together. All the progress I felt I'd made with Draco had just ended. If he felt anything for me at all, he wouldn't be going out with Hermione. My best friend of all people. It's like he was trying to torture me. And I wasn't going to stand for it.

I stewed over this long and hard and I knew their date was in progress the entire time I sat and turned colors over how angry I was. I knew where they'd gone and could just burst in there and ruin the date. But then I'd look like a complete moron and an asshole. So I had to wait it out and at least pray Hermione came home after and didn't go to his place. That was reserved for me. Not her. To think of them cuddling on our couch made me sick inside. But then I realized it wasn't really _our_ couch and we weren't a couple. But we should be! At least I think so. I wasn't sure I could make it through the evening but finally Hermione and Draco both showed up at our place. I was in the kitchen so they didn't see me right away, but I was peeking through the door and listening to them talk.

"So it was a lovely time," Hermione said as she tossed her purse to the table and smiled at Draco.

"It was lovely. I'm so glad you decided to say yes finally," he smiled at her.

"You were persistent," she giggled. Ugh. A girlish giggle? They were so gonna kiss and I knew it.

Before it could happen I burst through the door.

"Hello guys! Good to see you again! Did you have fun?" I asked as cheerfully as I could muster.

I startled the shit out of them both and it took them a moment regain their composure.

"Harry! You're here. I thought you'd gone out," Hermione said in a slightly clipped tone.

"I did, but I got back ages ago. Figured I'd wait up for you two crazy kids," I smiled a slightly deranged looking smile.

"That's nice of you, but we're fine. You can skedaddle away now," Draco said giving me a glare and pleading with me silently to leave them alone. I wasn't having any of it.

"I have no place else I need to be. Why not tell me about the date? How was dinner?" I said plopping down on the couch and staring up at them.

"It was fine," Hermione said with a slight nod.

"Great! So I guess since it's late, Draco probably should go now huh?" I yawned and stretched and looked right at him.

"Actually I'm not tired at all. But you apparently are. So run along to bed, Harry. Leave us be. Good night," Draco said giving me the evil eye.

"You know what? I _am_ a little tired. We should call it a night, Draco. But I really did have fun. Thanks," Hermione smiled at him as she touched his arm affectionately. That was my move. I created that move! And there she was using it on him.

"Alright. If you're sure. I thought you said we could have a nightcap?" Draco inquired.

"I didn't realize Harry would be up and here. In our faces. Maybe another time?" she offered giving me a stern look and I realized she was only getting rid of Draco so she could properly yell at me. She wasn't doing this as a favor or because I wanted their date to end. She was going to rip me a new asshole and I had it coming. I braced for impact.

"Okay. Another time. Good night Hermione," Draco said and leaned over and gave her cheek a small kiss. He gave me a death glare too and then he headed out the door. I looked at Hermione once the door shut behind him.

"So, he finally took the hint, eh?" I said, realizing I was digging myself a larger hole than I already had dug.

"What the hell is your problem Harry? Why did you do that?" she asked as she beat me over the head with a couch pillow.

I held up my hands to ward off the assault but she managed to knock my glasses off my face and mess up my already jacked up hair.

"Stop!" I cried. "I'm sorry. It's just did you see the look he gave you? Like he was going to take you to bed? I was saving you! I deserve an award! Friend of the year!" I said defensively.

"Friend of the year, my arse! Maybe I _wanted_ him to bed me? I haven't had a good shag since Ron and I broke up almost two years ago! A girl has needs!" she shouted at me as she flung the pillow across the room.

"I didn't know you had needs like that," I admitted, thus proving I didn't understand women at all. I figured it was just men who needed sex to be happy.

"You're an idiot then! Of course I do! I thought maybe tonight I'd get some at least but you ruined it. Do you hate me that much? Why are you acting this way?" she wondered sadly.

"I'm sorry. I guess I just don't trust Draco around you, is all. I don't want you to get hurt," I said honestly, even if it wasn't my main motivation.

"I'm a big girl Harry. I can take care of myself. And Draco was honestly a gentlemen the entire night. I kind of like him," she admitted with a sigh. "I hope you didn't ruin it for me."

"I'm sure I didn't. Draco just thinks I'm a jerk probably. He'll yell at me and then it'll be fine," I sighed right back at her.

"You kind of deserve to be yelled at, you dork. Why would you try and protect me from him anyway?"

"Because he is my friend and I hear the shit he says about you. And he's kind of a pig, which you've said so yourself in the past. I guess that's why it startled me to see you two going out," I admitted.

"I know he's a pig sometimes, but I don't care right now. I'm in desperate need of some male company, Harry. And let's face it, Draco is hot," she said with a grin and a chuckle.

I chuckled right back and had to agree with her. I mean that was the whole reason for this debacle in the first place. My jealousy. But I looked up at Hermione with my best 'forgive me' look.

"Are you still mad at me?" I asked.

"Yes. But I'll get over it. I appreciate that you were concerned though. It's just I don't need an overprotective big brother."

"But I like being that to you," I smiled at her.

"Yeah, I know. But you also know I'm perfectly capable of handling myself and weeding out the bad apples."

"But Draco is so charming that it's almost impossible to know if you're being played. Trust me."

"Maybe I wanted to be played with? Ever think of that? Sometimes a girl just wants a good shag and doesn't need a marriage proposal," she said with a smirk.

I laughed and shook my head.

"God I'm so lame. I'm the oldest living virgin and I don't know a damn thing about women or their needs. I honestly thought you could live without sex forever and be happy."

"Please! No way. I mean, I'm going for a record of having a dry spell, but it's not by choice. I was holding out for you, but that didn't work out. So now maybe I just want someone really hot to give it to me good," she said with a devious look in her eyes.

"Stop! The imagery is too much! I can't envision you doing that with Draco. Ugh. Yuck. No," I held up my hands.

"You could have given it to me, but you chose not to. So remember that," she told me as she poked my side.

"I would not have been able to give it to you the right way. Or at all. Trust me. I'm hopeless. I'm probably never going to get laid," I lamented sadly.

"Sure you will. Someday. Just maybe with a guy right? That is what you said you wanted."

"It is. I think. I'm fairly sure, yes. It's just complicated."

"How so? Dating is dating. You have to put yourself out there. And from what you told me about your gay bar experience, you totally did not put yourself out there. You were super closed off and aloof."

"I know. I was. But I kinda sorta like a specific person. I'm holding out for them," I explained.

"Yeah, Draco told me that. Who is it Harry? Tell me!" she said plopping down next to me on the couch. "We could double date or something."

"I don't think so," I shook my head.

"Why not?"

"Because it just wouldn't work out. And besides I don't want you to see Draco again," I pouted slightly.

"Well too bad. I'm gonna see him again if he wants to take me out. And next time, I won't have you ruin it!" she said shoving me playfully and leaning her head against my shoulder.

She'd obviously forgiven me but I was still upset about what was going on. But how could I explain why? I had no real claims to Draco. And he obviously didn't want to be with me if he was really taking Hermione out. But I wanted him to want me. And I didn't want her to get in the way . I felt like it was better when she wouldn't give him the time of day. But there was nothing I could do. I just had to sit back and watch them date. Yuck. I hated that plan.

Hermione kissed my cheek and announced she was going to bed. I watched her go up the stairs and I just sat on the couch and wondered what I should do since I'd already established there wasn't anything I could do. But maybe I could seduce Draco like he taught me to do? Except it probably wouldn't work and I'd end up looking like a fool. But just then there was a knock at the door. I got up to answer it and grabbed my wand. It was rather late for visitors, so I didn't want to be too careless.

"Who is it?" I called out, not wanting to get too close to the door just yet.

"It's me, you moron!" Draco called out. "Open up or I'm blasting the door open."

Fuck. I wasn't ready to see him again yet. What was he doing here? Hoping to run upstairs and lock himself in with Hermione before I could stop him? I wasn't sure, but I opened the door cautiously and looked at him.

"What do you want, Malfoy?" I said trying my hardest to be indifferent.

"What do you think I want, Potter? I want an explanation. Where's Hermione?" he asked gruffly.

"She's upstairs. Sleeping. Alone. So don't bother her."

"I'm not going to bother her. I'm going to bother you. What was the deal earlier? Why did you fuck up my shit? You know I've been dying to go out with Hermione for months and you ruined my chances at a fun night," he said unhappily as he marched past me and stood in the living room with his hands on his hips.

"I didn't trust you. You've told me so many times how you wanna fuck her brains out that I couldn't deal with you being near her," I admitted truthfully.

"So what if I want to fuck her brains out? Did it ever occur to you that maybe she wants them fucked out?" he asked with exasperation.

"No," I said in a small voice. I now realized this was the case, but I still didn't feel like telling him that.

"Well maybe you should have thought of it. She'd been giving me signals all night and then wham! There you were bollocksing up my entire evening. I thought we were mates!"

"We are! But so is Hermione to me. I'm looking out for her. And I don't trust you with women."

"Fuck you then. That's not friendship. Friends help friends get laid. That's what I've tried to do to you! It's not my fault you're the worst student in the world when it comes to learning how to be smooth. But friends don't fuck up each other's games," Draco said with irritation.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have meddled. If it was another girl I wouldn't have said anything." This wasn't a lie. I probably wouldn't have said anything. But I'd still be jealous. But in this case I really was worried for Hermione.

"Did it ever occur to you that I like Hermione? She's interesting and smart and funny. Sure I wanna shag her, but I really do _like_ her," he said honestly.

"I wish you didn't," I said softly.

"Why?"

"Because."

"Because why?"

"I don't know. It just complicates stuff, that's all."

"How does it complicate anything? I thought you'd be happy actually. I mean, then the three of us could all hang out together and it would be fun," he said with a smile.

The three of us together was the last thing I wanted in actuality. I wanted Draco for myself. Sharing wasn't my strong suit right now. I wanted Draco to be mine. But sadly he wanted to be Hermione's instead. And now no one wanted me because I'd shut Hermione down. So now I was dateless and desperate and probably would die a virgin. I guess I had it coming. I just held my head in my hands and sat on the couch. Draco walked over and sat next to me.

"What's wrong?" he asked curiously, touching my shoulder.

"Nothing. It's just I don't want to be the third wheel. I'm _always_ the third wheel. It was like that with Ron and Hermione too. I'm sick of it," I admitted.

"You're not a third wheel."

"Yes I am. For once I want someone all for me. Just for me. No one else."

"Who are you talking about? Me or Hermione?" he wondered with a raised eyebrow.

"I don't know. Either or. Both. It doesn't matter," I rambled nonsense at him.

"If you want me all to yourself, you know I'm always going to be your friend if you need one. And Hermione feels the same. If you want alone time, just tell one of us to fuck off. Only I'd say it nicer than that. But you catch my drift. Besides, I'm not marrying Hermione. I went on one date with her and I want to shag her senseless at least once. That might be all there is to it. She could kick me to the curb afterwards," he tried to reassure me.

"She'd never do that. I'm more worried of you doing that to her. But still. I don't know. I guess three just seems like a crowd," I told him with a sigh.

"We really need to find you a man. Desperately. Then you won't be this annoying and mopey about everything," he patted my back and leaned over next to me.

"Easier said than done."

"God you are so pathetic sometimes. Look tomorrow we'll hang out okay? We'll do whatever you want. But on one condition," Draco told me seriously.

"What's that?" I was intensely curious.

"You stay out of my private life with Hermione."

Ugh. Anything but that. I wasn't sure if I could do it. But the prospect of spending an entire day with him alone doing anything I wanted sort of won out. So I nodded my head.

"Okay. Deal. But I have a condition too," I piped up.

"What?"

"Break her heart, and I break your face. I don't care if we are friends. I mean it, Malfoy," I said in my most menacing voice.

"Got it. I won't break her heart. But what happens if she breaks mine?" he inquired.

"I'll give her a stern talking to. I can't really break her face because she's a girl. But I'd stick up for you!"

"Okay then. So think about what you wanna do tomorrow and I promise you'll have me all to yourself. But now, I'm tired. So I'm going back home. See you around noonish tomorrow?" he offered.

"Yeah, sounds good." I nodded.

"Good."

"Draco?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm sorry I fucked up your night."

"Water under the bridge. See you tomorrow."

And with that, he was gone. I'd have to wait to see him and I had no idea what we'd do, but the important thing was that I'd have him all to myself for the day. I couldn't ask for more. I just had to think of something really good we could do. I went to bed that night thinking of nothing but his face and how I'd almost ruined my friendships with him and Hermione tonight. I needed to stop being such a dipshit. But it was hard. I loved them both. I just didn't want them to be together. I wanted Draco for myself. And in a perfect world, I'd get him. Too bad this wasn't a perfect world. But maybe one day it would be.

To be continued….


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer:** I own none of the characters here. JK Rowling and company own them. I merely play with them for my own amusement. Please don't sue. I have nothing of value anyway.

 **Summary:** Harry is caught in a love triangle to rival all else. He's found himself questioning his sexuality and is owning up to his attraction to Draco Malfoy. Meanwhile Draco is cozying up to Hermione, who won't give him the time of day. And Hermione keeps thinking there's hope for her and Harry to have a future together. It's a tangled web of emotions and will anyone get what they want? Set a couple of years after Hogwarts ended. Told from Harry's POV. Drarry. With talk of Harmony and Dramione.

 **Three is a Crowd**

The next day I got up early in preparation for whatever it was Draco and I were going to do. I had no idea what to plan but I didn't care if we just hung out at his place all day and stared at a wall, as long as we were together. But I found out that Hermione was still sort of mad at me when she got up and I offered her breakfast. I rarely cooked, but since I was up early I thought it would be a nice thing to do for her. But when I asked how she wanted her eggs she made a face at me.

"Are you trying to butter me up so I'm not mad at you anymore?" she asked with a slight yawn as she sat down at the table.

"No. I didn't realize you were still mad. I thought we made up."

"We did. Sort of. But I'm still a little annoyed with you," she said as I handed her a coffee mug and a thing of cream.

"Will eggs over easy make you love me again?" I wondered with a small goofy grin on my face.

"I don't know about love, but if you make me an omelet I'll be pretty happy," she said with her own goofy grin.

"An omelet? You know I suck at those. They always end up being scrambled eggs with stuff floating in them," I admitted with a sigh.

"Oh alright. Make me whatever you're eating. I guess I'll forgive you. That is if we can go to the cinema today and see that new chick flick with Sandra Bullock," she smiled at me.

"I can't. I'm supposed to hang out with Draco today," I told her regretfully, even though I really didn't want to see that movie anyway.

"That's not fair. You ruin my date with him and now you won't even take me to the movies to make up for it?" she pouted.

"We can go another time maybe."

"Why can't all three of us go?" she offered happily.

Ugh. No. That was not the plan. She was encroaching on my territory again. And really before you knew we'd be a threesome and I'd be the one left out again. I wanted guy time and I tried to gently explain that to her.

"Guy time? Don't you get enough of that?" she wondered.

Really, you could never get enough of that. But I tried to let her down gently.

"Hermione, that movie is called a chick flick for a good reason, and it's because men don't want to watch it. Why would Draco and I go there with you? We'd be bored."

"But you're my best friend. It's your job to go see movies with me," she informed me.

"Go with Ginny. Or Luna. Or that girl Sharon you had lunch with the other day at work," I offered.

"Fine, fine. I get it. You're sorry about last night and want me to forgive you, but you don't want my company. I'm beginning to think that the reason you ruined my date wasn't because you were worried about me, but because you're in love with Draco," she said making a face at me.

My own expression fell and I realized she was not a stupid girl and I was amazed she hadn't put the pieces of the puzzle together yet. I just sighed and buttered her toast and didn't respond to her. This made her senses perk up and she started laughing at me.

"Oh my god, that's it isn't it? You're in love with Draco! I just thought you were friends, but you _love_ him. You wanna be _with_ him. You were jealous of _me_ last night!" she cried with triumphant giggles.

"Shut up! That's not true. I'm not in love with him. You're crazy," I protested.

"Liar. You are too. I mean, I don't know how I didn't figure it out sooner except Draco just seems very hetero when I'm with him, and I wouldn't imagine you'd go there. But you have a crush! It's so obvious now. You wanna marry him!" she teased me.

"I never said that! You are just talking crazy now, Hermione. I like Draco. We have fun together. But of course I know he's hetero. Mostly anyway," I added somewhat under my breath, but she heard me clearly.

"What do you mean 'mostly'? Has he done something with you? Have you guys made out or something?" she asked, suddenly very interested in the conversation.

"No, we haven't made out or anything like that. But he likes to cuddle on the couch with me and play with my hair. Plus he once got a boner when we were together. I personally think I stand a chance," I said boldly.

"Oh my god. This is so weird. You guys cuddle? How come you never told me that?" she wondered fervently.

"I didn't know what to say. But yes, we cuddle. Sort of. I mean, it's not like we're all hugging and stuff, but he leans on me and he definitely loves my hair. Which is an obvious sign of liking me a lot because my hair is a nightmare. He even said the glasses were sexy," I told her, getting excited at finally vindicating all these little signs I was keeping bottled up to myself.

"He said your glasses were sexy? This is bizarre. I mean, why is he asking me out then if he's all cuddly with you? I'm confused."

"You and me both. I can't read him. Or understand what he's feeling or thinking. But yes, I was jealous last night. That's why I acted like a moron. But I wasn't lying either because he does say crude things about what he wants to do to you, which further confuses me," I explained.

"Well I suppose he's bi then. Lots of people are. His door swings both ways," she shrugged.

"You think so?" I wondered as I handed over her eggs and sat down across from her.

"It sounds like it. Why else would he do those things with you but then still want me? He's either bisexual or way more confused than you are."

"I just wonder if I should make a move on him or not. I'm worried he'll get scared off. What if he's just touchy feely with people and not really into me?" I asked befuddled.

Hermione took a bite of her eggs and waved the fork in the air.

"You'll never know unless you try. I'm just glad you told me. It kind of changes my plans a bit when it comes to him."

"How come? Because he likes guys too? Maybe anyway. We're not sure."

"No, not because of that. I don't care about that. I just mean it changes things because _you_ want him. I didn't know that before. And I'm not going to step on your toes. You got there first. I'll just duck down and go back to ignoring his advances," she explained with a flourish of her fork.

"But if you really want him and he wants you, don't stop on my account. I could just be daydreaming I have a chance," I told her honestly.

"Yeah, but you still have a crush and I don't want to have you angry with me or jealous of me. I barely know Draco really. I just think he's cute. I'm not in love with him or anything," she said dismissively.

"I think I _am_ in love with him. I don't know what to do about it," I held my head in my hands and sighed.

"I say tell him. Or at least tell him you have a crush. Maybe don't use the L word just yet," she advised me.

"Ugh. God, I never meant this to happen. I mean, we both used to hate the guy with a fiery passion and now we're fighting over who gets to bone him," I laughed slightly.

"That is incredibly weird when you put it that way. Ron would so not understand either of us right now. He'd freak out. Which speaking of, have you even talked to him in ages?" Hermione asked with curiosity.

"No, I haven't really talked to him since Draco entered the scene. Besides Ron is busy with his new girlfriend Sarah or Samantha. I can't remember her name."

"I think it's Sasha actually. But yeah, I don't talk to him either. Which isn't a surprise since he's my ex. But he was your bestie. He'd never understand this," she shook her head.

"No, he wouldn't. And I'm not telling him. So you better not."

"Why would I tell him? I already said I don't talk to him."

"Just checking. I'm already confused enough. I don't need Ron judging my taste in men. Or the fact that I like men at all, of which he has no clue."

"My lips are sealed. Promise."

"Thanks."

"No worries. So do you want me to be scarce when it comes to Draco? I'll stop going out with him," she offered.

"I'd sort of appreciate it if you didn't date him, however if he really likes you and not me, then what would be the point of you staying away? See, that's where I get confused," I admitted.

"That's why you need to talk to him. Find out what's going on. And then report back to me. I'm so excited to find out what he's thinking. I bet he totally likes you back and is just assuming you don't feel that way for him," she said supportively.

"I guess I should make myself clearer then?"

"Yes! Do it! And then maybe you'll finally get some. Of course _I_ won't be getting any, but at least one of us gets to fuck the cute guy right?" Hermione laughed.

"Hermione!"

"What? It's true."

"It is sort of true. I'm torn though because I'd like it to be you, so you're happy. But then again, I'd like it to be me because I _really_ want him. Like super bad. I'm in deep."

"Then I want you to have him. I hope it goes well. What are you doing today anyway?" she asked me.

"I have no clue. He just promised we'd hang out together all day. I could barely sleep thinking about it, which is why I'm up so early," I explained.

"Oh Harry. I'm so glad you finally told me the truth about things. Now I'm not mad at you anymore. I get it. I wish you would have just told me straight off."

"I would have except I knew you didn't like Draco before. And plus I didn't know how to explain my feelings or why I felt like he might like me. I just didn't want to jinx it. And I still don't. I might have already done that though."

"Nah, you didn't. I'm sure it's going to work out. If he has any taste, which I'm sure he does, he'll totally go for you," Hermione told me supportively.

I smiled at her and realized what an amazing catch she really was. Part of me wished I could be what she wanted me to be to her, but I knew I couldn't be. But she deserved someone amazing by her side. And I hoped she found him. But for now all I could offer was my brotherly love and friendship and I got up and hugged her from behind and kissed her cheek.

"I love you," I said into her ear.

"I love you too," she leaned up and kissed my lips in a friendly manner. "You're my best friend. Always. I hated being mad at you."

"I hated having you mad at me."

"Besties again. And you better go get dressed. Wear that navy blue shirt that I bought you for your birthday. It looks really good on you. Oh and wear the shoes that match and not the brown ones."

"Okay. Any other tips?" I wondered.

"Yeah, just be you. He'll fall in love. How could he not?"

I kissed her forehead and smiled and headed out to get myself ready for the day. There was an extra spring in my step now that Hermione and I were squared away and she knew everything now. It felt like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. I don't know why I didn't just tell her sooner, like she said. But sometimes I'm really stupid and like to suffer in silence. This whole mess could have been avoided if I'd been honest with her. Or with him. But that was sometimes a scary prospect. Especially with him. But today I was going to do my best to lay it on the line and see where I stood.

Draco showed up at the house exactly at noon, just like he said. Hermione locked herself upstairs to give us privacy and said for me to tell Draco she'd gone to the movie already if he asked for her. When I opened the door, Draco looked amazing. He had on a gray shirt and black trousers with those loafers on his feet again. He always seemed so polished except for the bedhead which I loved about him. He smiled at me and before I could tell him how good he looked he actually complimented me.

"You look fab today, Potter. I love that shirt. The color is good on you," he said with a smile.

"Thanks. Hermione bought it for me for my birthday."

"She has good taste. How do I look?" he held out his arms for my perusal.

"You look amazing as always. But you already knew that didn't you?" I laughed slightly.

"I just wanted to hear you say it," he grinned. "So where is Hermione today?"

"She's gone to a movie. She wanted me to go, but I told her we were busy."

"Oh. Okay. Well, maybe I'll see her later? Did you decide what we're doing today? I left it up to you to plan."

"I know and I couldn't really think of much except I thought maybe we could go to Hogsmeade and have lunch to start with," I offered.

"Alrighty. Sounds good. Plus there is this quaint bookshop there and I think Hermione would love this one book I saw. I mentioned it to her last night," Draco said with a thoughtful expression.

But my expression fell. It was supposed to be our day and he wasn't supposed to be buying books for Hermione. But I bit my tongue and said maybe if we had time we'd stop in there. But really, I'd have to think of something else pressing to do in order to not have time. But we set off together and apparated to the small village we both loved and it was nice autumn afternoon with a cool breeze blowing the leaves around. We walked together to The Three Broomsticks and went inside. There were a lot of people enjoying the afternoon but we found a nice table by the window and sat down together.

"You know I haven't had a butterbeer in ages. You wanna get one?" I asked him curiously.

"I was thinking more Firewhiskey, but if you want butterbeer help yourself," he smiled at me.

"Is butterbeer a totally girl drink?" I wondered.

"No, but I like something less sweet and much stronger. But you order what you want. I'm buying."

"You don't have to buy mine. I could buy," I offered.

"Nah, my treat. I figured since I got your knickers in a twist last night, it's the least I can do," he said to me.

"Yeah, about last night. I'm sorry again. I know I was out of line, but it just caught me off guard to see you two together."

"I don't know why. It's not like I'd hurt her. She's your best mate. And I may be a cad, but I'm not a rapist or anything. If we shagged, it'd be because she _wanted_ to. Just remember that," he chided me.

"I know. I'm really sorry. I guess I just didn't want you shagging her at all."

"Why? You don't want to shag her do you? I mean, it's you she wanted and not me. But you said no."

"It's not that. It's just complicated." I wanted to say it's YOU I want to shag, but I couldn't get the words out. Not yet. Not like this. Not while sitting in The Three Broomsticks.

"Well whatever it is, I hope you're over it. And if you're worried about being a third wheel, you're obviously not because here I am. All for you. Just like I promised."

"I know. And I'm glad. I really am. So what are you getting to eat?" I asked, trying to change the subject slightly.

"I think I'm getting a burger. What about you?" he asked as he closed the menu we both knew so well already.

"Same."

When the waitress came Draco ordered both of our meals and Firewhiskey for himself and the butterbeer for me. I really should have had the whiskey too because then I'd be more loose with my lips and affections, but I wanted my wits about me if I was going to tell him how I felt. But every time I thought about doing it, I wished I'd ordered the Firewhiskey too.

"Can I have a sip of your drink?" I asked him curiously when the waitress refilled his glass.

"Sure." He slid it across the table and I took a bigger gulp than I intended to and didn't leave much for him.

"Shit, if you want some, just order some," He laughed at me.

"Maybe I should? This butterbeer is good, but unless you're a house elf you can't really get drunk off it."

"No you cannot. Which is why I didn't order that. Here I'll get you your own glass," he said as he signaled the waitress again and asked for two more. "You can finish that one up if you want."

I readily took him up on that offer and downed the rest of it. It burned going down and I could feel the fire in my belly. But it was already starting to give me more courage.

"So there's this spot in the woods that has swimming hole. It's really secret and private and I was thinking we could go there after lunch," I told him, already feeling slightly looser from the drink.

"A swimming hole? It's a little chilly out today with the breeze," he pointed out.

"Yeah, but I'm not afraid of a little breeze. I thought it'd be fun. I used to go there with Ron and Hermione a lot. We found it when we were on our endless camping trip to find Horcruxes. It was the one place we all agreed we'd like to visit again, even though we were sick of the woods."

"Alright. I'll give it a go. But I don't have swimming trunks obviously," he noted.

"Me neither. But you don't need them do you? I mean, we used to just jump in in our underwear."

"Who said I wear underwear?" he smirked at me.

I gulped and looked at him with a look that must have given away my lust for him because he started laughing at me.

"Down boy. I was kidding! I do wear boxers. Sorry to break your heart though," he reached over and shoved my arm playfully.

"You didn't break my heart. As if I wanna see you naked," I scoffed unconvincingly.

"You totally do. I can tell. But I'm not shy so maybe you'll get your wish?" he said with a little wink.

I hated it when he winked at me because it was so confusing. Did that mean he had something in his eye or that he was teasing me or wanting me or what? But I didn't have much time to ponder it because our drinks arrived along with our burgers and we quickly dug into everything.

"Here, try one of my chips. You'll like it," he said offering me a chip slathered with mayonnaise.

I made a face at it though. I didn't like mayo on chips. A lot of people ate them that way, but I preferred ketchup. I wasn't a mayo fan, but he swore it was good.

"No, I don't wanna eat that. It looks wrong," I noted the thick white consistency.

"Oh get your mind out of the gutter, Potter! Just taste it," he told me making a face.

I leaned over and took a bite of the chip and instantly regretted it. I didn't like it, but I wasn't going to spit it out in front of him, so I just swallowed it. But I shook my head.

"Ugh, yuck. No. I didn't like that."

"Why not? It's delicious."

"I like ketchup."

"Yuck. That's some gross shit. But I don't like tomatoes."

"I know, but you eat tomato sauce on pasta," I pointed out.

"True, but that's different. Ketchup just tastes icky."

"Icky? You're so weird."

"No, you're weird."

"We're both weird." I stuck out my tongue at him and he stuck his out right back. If only we'd move closer together we'd be kissing. But alas, we weren't. Not just yet.

Once our lunch was over, Draco paid the check and we were both slightly drunk but not falling down or anything. Just enough that he forgot about the bookshop and just let me apparate us to the swimming hole. That was my intention to get his mind off Hermione and her love of old books, and just concentrate on being with me. And it worked. The swimming hole was exactly how I remembered it from before. There were lots of rocks and a little pool of deep water that you could jump into from the highest rock and still not hit the bottom. We stood there and surveyed the atmosphere and Draco gave it his stamp of approval. We plopped down on a big flat rock and just sat together for a moment. I leaned over and nudged him with my body.

"So you gonna get naked or what?" I teased him.

"You'd love that, wouldn't you?" he teased back.

"I might. You're the one who said you had a fine ass before and that you'd stare at it yourself if you could."

"That is true. I did say that. I also seem to recall noticing yours wasn't half bad either," he nudged me back with his body.

I smiled over that comment and we just sat there leaning on each other for a little while, drinking in the beauty of the place. And enjoying each other's company. Finally I got bold and stood up. I took my shoes off first and then I stripped my shirt off and then undid my trousers. Draco stood up and did the same and I watched with baited breath as his trousers got tossed in a heap on the ground next to mine. We were both standing in our boxers and suddenly the air felt charged and heated and not chilly at all. I was ready to just grab him and kiss him, but I was stopped when he reached down and pulled off his boxers and tossed them to the ground too. I couldn't help but stare at him intently with my mouth hanging open. He was rather huge. More so than I expected or dreamed he'd be. He wasn't just bragging needlessly about the size of his cock. He really had something worthwhile in those pants. Off my vacant and obvious stare he just shrugged and said he didn't want wet underwear. And then he jumped off the rock and into the water.

I thought about being a prude and just jumping in with my underpants still on. But if he was naked, then I wanted to be naked too. I wanted him to see me because maybe he'd like what he saw too? I hoped he would. So I stripped off my boxers and threw them aside and I jumped into the water right next to him. It was warm despite the slight chill in the air that neither of us seemed to feel anymore. And we immediately began playing around in the water, splashing each other and doing flips and trying to see who could swim faster. It was all very innocent really, despite my longings, but it didn't stay that way forever. I got bold and swam up to him and jumped on his back. Our naked wet bodies were pressed together and it felt like heaven.

"What are you doing?" he asked, trying to fling me off of him, but I held on tight.

I tried to dunk his head under the water and he proceeded to jump on me and do the same thing. It was the most erotic thing I'd ever experienced, even if we weren't having sex and just goofing off. We were _naked_. And _wet_. Did I mention we were _naked and wet_? My erection grew instantly and I knew he could feel it, but he seemed unfazed by it. And I tried to tell if he had one too, but I couldn't get myself into a good enough position to feel it until he pressed himself against my back and wrapped his arms around me. He was definitely hard. And he picked me up and tossed me away from him, laughing the entire time. I'd never had so much fun in my life. And it wasn't just because I was naked with Draco, it was because I honestly was in love with him. And here we were frolicking nude together in the water all alone where no one could see us or judge us or wonder what we were doing. It was our own Garden of Eden and I never wanted to leave.

Eventually we did get a little tired of splashing around and it was time to get out. We didn't have towels, but Draco just laid himself down face first on the rock and sunned himself like a lizard. I could see his smooth round ass just staring me in the face and I decided to copy his movements and laid on my stomach too. The rock was warm and I felt like with the breeze and the sun, I'd probably be dry in no time. I looked over at Draco.

"So did you like the swimming hole experience?" I wondered curiously.

"Uh-huh. It was fun. And I'm pleased to see that you're not shy. I thought you would be," he remarked noting my naked form, of which I was trying not to be self-conscious of.

"I'm not really shy around you. You make me bolder," I admitted.

"Good. Because I told you before that the mousy nerd act wasn't cutting it. You should be more confident and bold."

"I'm trying. But being naked in front of you is weird. I'm not used to being naked in front of other people at all."

"You have to get used to that. If you want a lover someday, you gotta get comfortable lounging around nude."

"I'm pretty comfortable right now," I admitted as I leaned over and nudged his body with my own, feeling his cool damp skin against mine.

"Really?"

"Really."

Draco looked over at me and straightened my glasses which were slightly askew. Then he brushed my hair out of my face and then rested his hand on my cheek for a moment. He smiled.

"Let's face it Harry, you're adorable. Someone is gonna snap you up," he admitted as he ran his hand down my cheek and then dropped it back down again.

"Would you be interested in me? If you were like that?" I asked boldly, finally ready to get this show on the road.

"If I were like what? Gay you mean?" he asked with a raised eyebrow.

I nodded and reached over and ran my hands through his messy blond mop of hair that even in its messiness, it looked polished somehow.

"Harry, I like being with you. I don't want to complicate it," he said finally.

"Complicate it how?" I wondered.

"By bringing a new layer to the friendship. I don't want to hurt you. I'm notoriously bad at relationships. So maybe I would be interested but I'm poison, Potter," he said scooting away from me and sitting up to pull his boxers back on.

"Wait a minute. No. You don't get to decide if you're poison or not," I said sitting up and pulling on my own boxers. I felt too exposed, and I suspected he did too. We were both suddenly aware of our nakedness.

"You don't even want me around your best friend, so why would you want me around _you_ in that way?" he asked, totally perplexed.

"Because I don't care. But let me just get this clear first. You're not saying you don't want me? You're saying I shouldn't want you? Is that what's happening?" I wanted to clarify the situation.

"That's exactly what I'm saying."

"Well fuck that. I don't care. Draco, I want you. God, I've wanted you since the moment you came to my house all those months ago and sat on my couch and complained about my furniture not being comfortable enough. I haven't stopped thinking of you since then. And I don't care if you're bad for me. Lots of things are bad for me, but I still want them. Like drinking and smoking. Well okay, I don't smoke. But I could start and it would be okay because it's my choice!" I rambled to him.

"Harry, just shut up okay?"

"What? No. I have a lot to say about this—"

Draco stopped me from speaking with his lips. He planted his mouth directly on mine and I thought I might pass out. I literally felt dizzy and like the world was spinning around us. And I felt his tongue search for mine and I readily accepted him into my mouth. And we kissed roughly and passionately and needfully. I didn't want to stop ever. But he finally pulled back and stared at me breathlessly.

"You don't know what you're in for, Potter," he informed me. And then he just gathered his clothes and started getting dressed again.

"I'm ready for anything," I told him happily, still riding a wave of ecstasy over our kisses.

"I'll hold you to it," he smiled slightly, like he wasn't too sure I really could live up to that bargain.

I got myself dressed and was confused as to why we were doing that when I really just wanted to kiss more. But he finally laughed slightly and looked at me as he slid on his shoes.

"So this is why you didn't want me shagging Hermione. You wanted me for yourself, eh?" he finally put the pieces together.

"Well duh. You're clueless if you didn't get that way before now."

"I wasn't clueless. I was just trying to put you off. Being with me is like being with a moody little child. I'm terrible at monogamy and I also say what I mean with perfect bluntness. And frankly Harry, I knew you could do better than me. I'm not even really gay," he admitted.

"What are you then?" I was confused.

He sighed and shrugged slightly.

"I tend not to label it. I guess I'm just sexually fluid. I'm attracted to people, not their parts. Well that's not entirely true. I like the parts too. It's just that I look past sexuality and am attracted to personality first. And to be honest, I've wanted you for years, Potter. Even when you detested me, it made me want to prove myself to you even more. I've wanted you forever. But once I got to know you better, I didn't feel like I was good enough. You're so much better than me in so many ways," he admitted softly.

"Bollocks. I don't believe that. And I'm not asking for a perfect person anyway. I just want you to want me as much as I want you. And I want to cuddle and laugh and hold hands and kiss and shag and maybe sometimes hate each other until we can't stand it anymore. I want it all. And I want it with you," I said bravely, not feeling nervous or shy anymore. Draco wanted me. He'd always wanted me. I had nothing to be nervous about.

"You'll sing a different tune when I end up breaking your heart," he said sadly.

"That's a load of bullshit because you don't _have_ to break my heart. You can _choose_ to break it, but it's not like it's fate or something. So just don't break it," I told him simply.

He touched the side of my face and leaned over and kissed me again. Then he pulled back and stared me right in the eyes.

"You're so pure and innocent still. If only we could all be like that."

I didn't really understand what he meant by any of this stuff or why he thought he'd have to break my heart. No one ever had to break someone's heart unless they wanted to. And why would he want to? But I didn't question him further, I just let him stand up and pull me up with him. Then before he could protest or say anything else, I grabbed him into a hug. I held him tightly and couldn't resist grabbing his butt and squeezing it before letting him go. He kissed my forehead and then he told me he had to go home now. He had stuff to take care of. I didn't know what stuff, and he didn't tell me. I just got the feeling he was trying to get away from me, which I didn't like. But I felt helpless to stop it.

We apparated to his flat and I watched him walk into the house and he didn't invite me in. He just kissed my lips softly and squeezed my hand and said he'd see me later. I didn't really know what was happening except instead of being excited and floating on a cloud like I was, Draco seemed almost sad that we'd gotten ourselves together. It didn't make sense. Why would he be sad? We had every reason in the world to be happy. But he felt not good enough, and he was right about one thing. That act was annoying. In my eyes, Draco was plenty good enough. And I was eager to proceed with our relationship. But he just wanted to be alone for some reason. But I let it go for now. I had to. And I just apparated back to my house, eager to tell Hermione what happened. But she'd left a note saying she and Luna went to the movie I'd refused to see. So I had no one to talk to. That's when I just sighed and sat on the couch and waited not so patiently for someone else to show up so I could share my news. Only what was the news exactly? Draco and I swam naked and made out, but then Draco abruptly stopped and said he wasn't good enough for me and then he wanted to go home. Were we a couple now? We were still just friends who had kissed? What was happening? I didn't know. I just knew I needed outside support with this. I needed Hermione in the worst way right now. She would know what to tell me. I just knew that the memory of his kisses would keep me warm at night for quite a while. And that would have to be good enough for now.

To be continued….


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer:** I own none of the characters here. JK Rowling and company own them. I merely play with them for my own amusement. Please don't sue. I have nothing of value anyway.

 **Summary:** Harry is caught in a love triangle to rival all else. He's found himself questioning his sexuality and is owning up to his attraction to Draco Malfoy. Meanwhile Draco is cozying up to Hermione, who won't give him the time of day. And Hermione keeps thinking there's hope for her and Harry to have a future together. It's a tangled web of emotions and will anyone get what they want? Set a couple of years after Hogwarts ended. Told from Harry's POV. Drarry, with undertones of Harmony and Dramione.

 **Three is a Crowd**

Once Hermione got home from the cinema, I frantically and excitedly told her all about my day. She was jumping up and down for me and thrilled that it seemed like I had gotten what I wanted after all. But then after that day, nothing happened. I saw Draco briefly at work, and Hermione saw him more, but he didn't excitedly talk about me. He didn't bring me up at all, according to her. And he was still flirting up a storm with her instead. I was more confused than ever. Did our kisses mean nothing? Did he not really want me as much as he said he wanted me? I didn't know what to think, but I was pretty depressed and also a little angry about it. I mean, you don't just do those things with a person then flirt with their best girlfriend and act like you don't exist! It's not polite or fair. Which always brought me back to Draco telling me he'd break my heart. Maybe he was just trying to break it now instead of later on down the road when it'd be worse? But that was a stupid plan, in my opinion. Draco was being stupid. And Hermione agreed with me and she said she gave him a good talking to and asked him what the hell was going on. But being the aloof bastard that he was, he just told her to stay out of it and then went back to his desk. Apparently he couldn't handle Hermione's shrill opinions. Which in his defense, can be a little hard to handle. But he deserved it!

Finally after an entire week went by without him so much as saying hi to me when he saw me, everything changed. He showed up at my house and I answered the door. He was just standing there with his hands wringing together and he looked nervous.

"Potter," he said when I opened the door.

"Malfoy," I said back, rather coolly.

"Look, I know I've been a bastard and I'm sorry. It's just I can't deal with this right now. Or at all really," he admitted as he made no move to come in.

"You can't just do what we did and then say that. It's not okay. At least come in and explain yourself better," I said trying to hide how much sadness and disappointment that was in my voice.

"Why do you need me to come in?" he asked somewhat awkwardly.

"Why'd you come all the way here if you're not going to at least come in?" I shot back.

"You got me there," he sighed. "I don't know why I came over. I probably shouldn't have."

"I don't understand, Draco. I thought we had a good time. Why are you being this way?" I wondered with confusion.

He sighed and ran his hands through his sexy bed hair.

"Look, I told you I'd break your heart and I wasn't good at monogamy. All that shit is true. So I thought I'd simply spare you the details and just let it go," he told me finally.

"Why do you have to break my heart? And what's so bad about monogamy? You can't commit to one person at all?" I asked, not understanding.

"It's hard for me. Especially because like I told you, I'm attracted to people for who they are. And to be quite honest, I'm still attracted to Hermione. I can't get the girl out of my head. But now there's you. And what am I supposed to do?" he asked, shaking his head.

"You've got to be joking. _Hermione_? She doesn't want you, Draco. Because unlike you, she's a friend and wouldn't do that to me when she knows I like you," I said angrily.

"What can I say? I'm a fuckwad. I never pretended I wasn't. I shouldn't have kissed you or said all those things," he admitted covering his face with his hands.

"Yeah, well you _did_ do all that stuff and said those things. Why can't you just be a man and own up to it all?" I challenged him.

"Look, can I come in? It's kind of chilly out here and if you're really hell bent on this conversation, then I should come in."

"It's probably a lot chillier inside here, but be my guest," I said, motioning for him to come in. It was downright cold in the house in terms of my attitude towards him.

He walked inside and went to sit on the couch. Before I could say anything, Hermione walked in and saw him sitting there.

"Oh! Sorry! I didn't know Harry had company. I'll just go back to the kitchen," she said quickly and turned around.

But Draco stood up.

"Wait! Don't go Hermione. I actually wanted to see you," he admitted softly, realizing how awkward the entire situation was.

"Me? Why would you want to see _me_?" she asked totally perplexed.

"He still likes you," I chimed in with bitterness in my voice.

"Still likes me? But we only went out once and then you and Harry…"

"I know. But I've been trying to explain to Harry that what we did was a mistake. He's a little cross with me," Draco said in a small voice.

"A _little_ cross? Try flaming mad. I can't even believe you came to my house to see Hermione after we made out naked and you said you'd wanted me for ages!" I said with more anger than I realized I had.

"I know that happened, but I wish it didn't. It was a mistake, Harry. I really just want to be friends with you. I should have never crossed that line," he said imploringly.

But I was having none of it.

"So you think you still have a chance with Hermione after that? Think again. She's a better friend than you'll ever be," I said huffily, crossing my arms across my chest.

"Harry's right. I'm not going out with you Draco. Not again. Not after you made out with Harry. He really likes you, you know? And you're playing games. I will not abide that or forgive it in any way. I don't like players," Hermione came to my defense nicely.

"Fine then. So you both hate me. I get it. I fucked up. But I'm confused, okay? I don't know what I want. If I'm honest, I want both of you," Draco said holding his hands in the air.

" _Both of us_?" Hermione and I said in disbelief at the same time.

"Yes, both of you. Is that so weird?" Draco wondered.

"Uh, yeah. It's not typical anyway. Do you mean at the same time or alternating weekends or what?" I asked with utter confusion.

"I don't know! Maybe not at the same time. But I can't make up my mind!"

"Well let me simple it up for you, Malfoy. I don't want to date you. End of story," Hermione said, giving him a look.

"But you _did_ want to date me. We went out!" he protested.

"So? Harry means more to me than you do. So forget it. I'd rather see Harry happy."

"But I don't know that I really want a _relationship_ with him," Draco said uncomfortably, looking away from me.

"Don't do me any favors. I never said I wanted a relationship with you either!" I lied to him. I had to somehow save face. He was ruining all my fantasies.

"I thought you did." Draco said shaking his head.

"I just wanted to have fun. And we had fun. I just don't get why it had to stop, is all," I said sitting on the couch and sighing.

"I'm terrible at this shit. Plus I'm not a hundred percent comfortable with my own sexuality, okay? Does that make you happy? I know that I'm attracted to you and Hermione both and it confuses the fuck out of me. I don't know what to do with the feelings. I-I've never acted on my attractions to men before! You were the first, Harry. And I freaked out," Draco admitted sitting down next to me on the couch, but far enough away so that we weren't touching.

"There's nothing to be uncomfortable about, Draco," I said, trying to comfort him when I wasn't entirely comfortable in my own skin either. He was my first too. I just assumed he'd kissed other guys before since he was so nonchalant about the whole matter.

"Are _you_ comfortable being gay? You can barely even say the word without stuttering," Draco pointed out to me.

"I-I'm not uncomfortable. I'm confused. Or rather, I was. But you sort of made me see the light. I know what I want now," I said with confidence, and it wasn't a lie. I was owning up to my true feelings, even if they were slightly awkward for me.

"Well I'm not as sure about what I want. Or who I want. I mean, I enjoyed our time. A lot. Don't get me wrong. But Hermione…look at her. She's beautiful. I-I can't stop thinking about her," Draco said giving Hermione a sideways glance, seemingly afraid to look at her head on.

"Draco, I don't feel that for you okay? I-I mean, I might. If Harry wasn't in the picture. But he is. And I refuse to hurt him like that," Hermione said truthfully.

"You know what? Forget it. I won't be hurt. If he really wants to be with you, then you guys should just be together," I said, not really meaning that, but unsure what else to really say. Hermione was being a good friend, but if Draco really fancied her, what was the point in me stopping them? I didn't stand a chance.

"See, Harry doesn't care," Draco said quickly to Hermione.

"Well _I_ care! I'm not going out with you. So forget it," she threw up her hands and shook her head.

"I'm just going to leave I think. I shouldn't have come," Draco said, standing up and heading for the door.

I stood up after him.

"Why did you come? To tell me you didn't want me? To ask Hermione on a date? Why?" I asked angrily.

"I came because I felt bad for ignoring you. I just wanted to explain myself. But I didn't really do a very good job of it."

"No, you really didn't. You just fucked up everything really. Now we're not even friends," I said sadly, unable to hide my disappointment.

"We could be though. I'd like to be. With both of you. If you'll have me," he said hopefully.

I looked at Hermione and she looked back at me. We tried to silently communicate with our eyes and we were pretty good at reading each other's signals. She was saying hell no, but I was saying, it's better than nothing. She gave me a look that said I deserved better, and I knew she was right, but I just didn't care. She saw me wavering and she grabbed my arm and yanked me towards the kitchen.

"We'll be right back," she told Draco, dragging me along.

She got me into the kitchen and whirled me around to face her.

"No Harry. He's trouble. He's going to break your heart even worse than he already has. He said so himself! We don't need him as our friend," she protested.

"But it was fun when we hung out together and stuff. I like his company. I can live without the romance," I shot back.

"But you like him much more than just a friend. You were so freaking excited when he kissed you. I can't watch you make a mistake like handing him your heart to mangle up," she said with concern.

"I'm a big boy. I can handle myself, you realize."

"I know. I just love you Harry. I don't want things to get weird or complicated or painful."

"They won't. We'll all just be friends. No one will expect more or want more," I said with hope in my voice. I was just not eager to let Draco go.

"But people already want more. He wants to bed me and you want to bed him. And frankly no one's asked me what I really want," she lamented with a sigh.

"I know what you want," I chimed in softly.

"Yeah?"

"You wanted me," I said in a small voice. "And we're still friends right? So why can't we be friends with Draco?"

She didn't have a comeback for that right away because she knew it was true. She finally sighed and rubbed her eyes.

"I don't like him as much as I like you so it's less important to me," she finally said.

"Well I _do_ like him as much as I like you, so it's important to me to be his friend. You don't have to, but I think he's hoping for a package deal," I told her truthfully.

"Fine, fine. But I'm not going out with him. I still respect your feelings too much to do that," she held up her hands.

"I wouldn't expect you to go out with him. Just be his friend. That's it. Like it was before."

"Okay. I still hate the idea, but okay."

"Okay. I love you Hermione," I smiled at her and kissed her cheek.

"Yeah, yeah. Ditto. The things I do for you, Harry!" she said giving me an exasperated smile.

"Come on, let's go back in the other room."

I took her hand and pulled her with me this time and we exited the kitchen and found Draco standing there examining the upholstery on the couch cushions. He looked up when we entered the room.

"So what's the verdict? Am I allowed to be friends with you two or am I banished back to my own corner of the universe?" he asked curiously.

"We can be friends," I announced.

"But you can be better friends with Harry than me. I don't really like you much," Hermione chimed in.

"Fair enough. Okay. May I ask why you don't like me much?" he asked her quietly.

"Do you really have to ask? You play with people's emotions. Among other things. I barely could stand you before and I only went out with you because you wore me down. But if you hurt Harry, I will punch you in the face again. And don't think I won't. Plus I'm stronger now than I was when I was thirteen so it might hurt just a little bit more," she said making a fist and showing it to Draco.

"Point taken. I'll be good and no one gets punched in the face," he said holding up his hands in surrender.

"Okay, friends then. Do you want to have dinner with us? We were going to order a pizza," I offered him, hoping he'd say yes.

"Sure. Pizza sounds good."

"Okay."

"Okay."

"I'll make the call," Hermione said with a small sigh. I could tell she wasn't really on board with this, but I know she loved me enough to suffer through this just so I'd be happy. I'd have to find some way to properly thank her for that.

Draco and I sat on the couch together and at first it felt awkward but soon enough he relaxed and wasn't acting like he was afraid to touch me. And I was holding back my emotions really well this time and pretended that his presence didn't affect me at all, even though it really did. I still wanted him. And I knew deep down he still wanted me. He'd said he wanted both of us. So I knew it wasn't crazy of me to think that. He just wasn't comfortable yet with who he was. And I personally felt like he was using his crush on Hermione to somehow 'normalize' himself and reject the parts that were actually gay and not just ambiguous like he tried to say they were. But I knew how it felt to want to lie to yourself about how you felt. I didn't want to be gay either, but I was fighting a losing battle. I am who I am, and Draco is Draco. No matter how hard he tries not to be. I know the real him. But then again, people were bisexual or pansexual or whatever-sexual, these days. I didn't know all the terms and wasn't about to make a fool of myself trying to use them. I just knew that sexuality wasn't so cut and dried anymore and it never really was. I was learning that. Because if I was straight, I'd probably be marrying Hermione someday. I loved her enough and she was a perfect match for me. Except I didn't want to sleep with her. I used to think it was just because we were such good friends and that I thought of her as a sister, but the reality of it was, that I wasn't really attracted sexually to _any_ women. It wasn't just her. But I sure tried hard to hide that. And that's what Draco was doing. Maybe one day he'd get tired of hiding? I wanted to make sure I was there if that day ever came.

We waited for the pizza to come and it was rather awkward at first. Hermione wasn't really talking to either of us, and I was attempting small talk with Draco.

"So how have you been this last week?" I asked finally, just to break the silence.

"Fine. Feeling like a shithead mostly, but that's to be expected," he admitted. "You?"

"I've been confused and upset mostly. So yeah, it's kind of sucked," I answered truthfully.

"I'm really sorry. I should have just said something sooner."

"Anyone wonder how I've been?" Hermione chimed in.

"How have you been?" Draco asked curiously.

"Pissed at you. And I know you said you're sorry, but Harry deserved better," she told him as she gave him a glare.

"I thought we were going to be friends and not hate me?" Draco said with a sigh.

"I'm trying, but it's so weird. Just last week Harry was on cloud nine because of you," she told him, and I wished she hadn't. I gave her a look.

"Please shut up, Hermione. I mean, can we not talk about my lameness in front of Draco?" I asked.

"Don't tell me to shut up, mister. You know I hate that," she said turning her nose up at me.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to say that. I just…it's just…you're embarrassing me, Hermione," I stammered.

"Look, I don't want you two to fight because of me. I know you were happy Harry, and I was too. I ruined it. And Hermione, you have every reason to be mad at me. I just wish we could all say it was water under the bridge and start anew," he pleaded with her.

"I'm trying. I really am. I just don't know what to say to you," she admitted.

"How about we change the subject from how we are, to what we did. Did you do anything fun this week?" I interjected, trying to save this situation.

"I worked."

"Yeah, me too."

"I had dinner with my folks Wednesday night," Draco tossed out.

"How was that?" I wondered.

"It was terrible mostly. My father harped on me for not getting a promotion at work yet. And my mother drank too much wine. Same old, same old."

"Is there a promotion you were up for at work?" I asked looking at him and Hermione.

"There is one, but so far they haven't said who's getting it. I'm hoping it'll be me," Hermione said with a proud smile.

"It probably _will_ be you," Draco agreed, even if he seemed slightly disappointed.

"You did a lot of work on that project too, but let's be real here. You spent half your time hanging out with Harry instead of working with me," she said truthfully.

"I did my fair share!" he protested.

"No you didn't. I mean, you did some, but I did more. And then you called in sick that day. I've never once called in ill to work. They look at that stuff!"

"Fine. Right. I suck. I get it."

"I never said you sucked," she shook her head. "I said you did _some_ of the work. I just did more."

"I hope you get it then. I don't really even want it. More responsibility? Nah. Not for me."

"More money? I rather think you'd like that part," she smiled at him.

"Pfft. Who needs more money? I have plenty of money already," he laughed slightly.

"Oh shut up. Not all of us are independently wealthy," she stuck out her tongue at him.

"It's not just me. Isn't Harry rich too?" he asked.

"I wouldn't say _rich_ , but I'm set for a while," I admitted, not wanting to rub it in Hermione's face.

"Well fuck you both then," she laughed as stuck up her nose at us.

I was relieved to hear her laugh and I think so was Draco. We both started laughing too and finally the atmosphere didn't feel so tense. I wanted it to feel more relaxed like it used to be. But that almost seemed impossible at first. There was just too much weirdness between us all. But the tension was broken. And I wondered what was really going on in Draco's mind. Did he imagine this night turning into a hot threesome starring me, him, and Hermione? Or was he really just there to be our friend? He was very hard to read. But once we were done eating, it looked like he was going to leave. He stood up and thanked us for letting him crash the meal.

"It's not a problem. Are you leaving?" I asked curiously.

"Only if you want me to leave. I wasn't sure how long the invitation stretched out."

"I'm going to go upstairs and read," Hermione announced, effectively getting herself out of an awkward situation.

"Really? You wouldn't rather have a drink with us?" I asked willing her to not scare Draco away so fast.

But she was having none of it. She shook her head.

"No drinks for me. I'll see you two later,"

And she headed up the stairs, leaving me and Draco alone. I looked at him.

"Do you want to have a drink? Or is being alone with me too much for you?" I wondered.

"I can be alone with you, you ninny. I just want to keep it friendly, is all," he said uncomfortably.

"I promise I won't try to jump your bones," I said snidely, shaking my head. "Even if there was a time when I thought you wanted me to."

"Harry, don't start okay? I know what happened and what I said, but I can't live up to it. Do you even know what my father would do if he found out what little I already did?" he said seriously.

"I thought you didn't give two shits less about your parents? Your father especially."

"I don't. But I do care about the money. He'll cut me off. He won't understand. He's not a 'cool' dad."

"I know he's not a 'cool' dad, but surely it's none of his business what you do. You're a grown man," I pointed out.

"I know I am, but I still have to live somewhat by his rules. And honestly he wants me to get married to a girl he knows the family of. I've protested that for a long time, but if he gets his wish, I'll be married off," Draco explained somewhat sadly.

"That's not what you want, I take it," I said quietly.

"No. Are you mad? Of course not," he scoffed. "If I had my way I'd…well, I'm not going to say what I want because it's a fantasy and not real."

"No tell me. What do you actually want?" I asked intently, needing to know the answer.

"Potter, I like you a lot. I have feelings for you. But I also fancy your friend, even if she hates me. In a perfect world, it'd just be the three of us together happily. Like one of those hippie love ins or some such shit. But if my father knew I was with a man and a mudblood? Shit will hit the fan and fly everywhere and no one will escape," he explained.

"So being with either one of us is shameful to you, but yet you still want us," I clarified.

"Yes, it's shameful. But you have to understand how I was brought up. You just didn't go against my father's wishes. Ever. Not unless you wanted an ass whooping."

"I'm sorry it's like that. And that it was always like that. But I think you're a grownup who doesn't need his father's money if everything else makes you miserable. What good are riches if you're alone or with a girl you don't even fancy? That sounds horrible."

He sighed.

"It is horrible. It's downright fucked up. I took a huge risk going to that gay bar with you, only I knew my father's spies would never in a million years be there. But if I get caught with you in a compromising position, it's all over for me. I can't risk it."

"Why didn't you just tell me all this before? I had no idea you were living under your father's thumb like this."

"I felt stupid, to be honest. You and Hermione don't cower in terror at your parents judgements."

"That's because we don't have parents," I said softly, knowing full well he was aware of my situation, but I didn't know if he knew about Hermione's.

"Hermione has folks doesn't she?" he looked confused.

"Uh, not anymore. She erased their memories and sent them to Australia. We tried to fix them and get them back, but it was useless. They were too damaged. And the healers said to let them go. So they don't know Hermione is their daughter. They blissfully live around the world and don't even know she exists," I explained.

"What? Why? How did that happen?" he was confused.

"Well, it's really not my story to tell I suppose. But since I already did, long story short, she was trying to protect them during the war. She thought we could fix them when it was over, if any of us survived. But it couldn't be done."

"Shit. That's fucking horrible. She must be devastated," he said shaking his head.

"She is. Or rather was. I don't know. She doesn't talk about it much anymore. She tells people they're dead just because it's easier than explaining the truth," I told him.

"Well I feel bad for her, but it doesn't change my situation. I wish someone would erase my parents memories or at least give them brain transplants. You don't know what it's like to live in fear of your own father. My mum is pretty great, but my dad is not very open minded."

"He never struck me as open minded, that's for sure. But I still say you should secretly do whatever you want to do," I said, hoping it might sway him back into my arms. It was a stupid, shitty reason to be apart just because he was afraid of losing his inheritance and his father's approval.

"I do live my life in secret. As much as I can. But he still finds things out. Like he found out I was spending most of my time here for a while and he wanted to know why. So I said it was for work, which wasn't a lie. And he said that it better be for work because Malfoy's didn't court mudbloods. He was worried I was dating Hermione. You weren't even on his radar because he would never fathom his son being queer," Draco sighed and had a hard time saying the last part. It came out almost as a whisper.

"You know, as long as we weren't affectionate in public places, we could still be together. Your father would just think we were friends. If you say he'd never fathom you being gay, he'd never even suspect," I pointed out hopefully, trying so hard to get him back.

"I thought of that. I really did. But he doesn't understand too much why you'd be my friend."

"Did he say that? Did you tell him we were friends?"

"I had to say we were friends because we were spotted at The Three Broomsticks by a friend of my father's. He wasn't mad, per say. He was just confused as to why you'd befriend me. I told him we agreed that the past was the past. He was actually a little happy because he said a friendship with you was good PR for us," Draco laughed somewhat bitterly.

"Well see, there you go. It's perfect then. We can be together and no one has to know what we do in private. Just us," I said, reaching over to touch his arm.

He let me touch it and closed his eyes, and I swear he was relishing my touch. But then he opened his eyes again and moved his arm away and said to stop.

"Harry, just don't go there. I-I'm not ready to be with you," he said trying to be gentle, but my feelings still got hurt.

"I don't know why. We like each other. A lot. And that day at the swimming hole? We were electric together. It was amazing. And don't try to tell me it wasn't," I said defensively, trying to get him to see the light.

"I know it was. God, I remember it. I was there. It was the best moment of my life. Do you know how long I've wanted to kiss you?" he said rubbing his temples, like the entire thing was giving him a headache.

"I don't know how long, but you could do it again. I'd let you. And no one can see us. We're totally alone. No spies. Just us," I said softly, moving closer to him.

"Harry, doesn't it bother you that I want Hermione too?" he tossed out to try and get me to back down. But it didn't work.

"No, because I think if you had to choose, you'd pick me. And also, she doesn't want you, but I do. So I kind of win out. So no, it doesn't bother me that you want Hermione. Maybe you're bisexual and not gay, but so what? As long as you want me, I don't care who else you might want," I said boldly and sincerely.

He laughed slightly.

"If she ever gives me an opening, I'm taking it," he told me.

"Fine. She won't."

"But if she does…"

"Then take it. But I'm giving you an opening now. You know you want me," I said confidently, which was not something I usually was when it came to Draco or my feelings for him. But someone had to be bold and not afraid. And this time, it had to be me.

"You're terrible. You're trying to talk me into dastardly things. Soon you'll be introducing me to crack and hookers," he chuckled softly.

"Shut up. There's nothing dastardly about being with me. It's just a little unconventional to old stuffy types like your father. But what he doesn't know, won't hurt him. Or you," I said, moving even closer so that our knees were touching as we sat on the floor facing each other. I took his hands and held them and he didn't stop me. I picked up his hand and kissed it gently. "I really, really like you Draco. Don't you get it? We could be happy."

It took him a minute to respond to me, but he finally did. And he responded by grabbing my hands tighter and pulling me over to him and planting a kiss on my lips. This kiss started out gentle and then soon grew passionate and rough. God, he was an amazing kisser. I've never kissed anyone that was so zealous and uninhibited. He claimed confusion, but his kisses said he knew what he wanted and that was me. I returned the fervor and we wrapped our arms around each other and kept kissing. We fell over into the stack of pillows lying on the floor from the couch and Draco pulled me on top of him. Then he removed my glasses and set them aside, as he smoothed my hair out of my face and just stared me deep in the eyes.

"You're such a good looking bloke. Did you know that? How hot you are?" he murmured to me as he kissed my forehead and then both of my cheeks before kissing my lips again.

"Not many people have told me that," I admitted softly and honestly. "But I think it's you who's the hot one. You're so sexy I get excited just seeing you walk into a room."

"You're excited now. I can tell." He said, biting my neck softly and smothering it with kisses.

"Hmm… you're pretty excited right now too," I murmured back at him. I could feel his erection pressing against my thigh, and we were both rock hard for each other.

"God what am I doing? I said I wouldn't do this anymore," he chided himself as he ran his hand down my arms.

"You're not very good at self-control. And we haven't even drank anything yet. We never got that far. Imagine what you'd do if you had a few," I said, as I kissed the side of his neck and ran my tongue over the sensitive flesh.

He made an audible gasping sound and then he moaned, which honestly nearly made me lose it in my pants. Just hearing his moans was enough to set me off. But thankfully I had a little more control than a horny thirteen year old, but not much.

"I want to fuck you, Draco. Don't you want to fuck me?" I asked boldly, whispering in his ear.

"Harry…damn it. Why are you saying this to me?" he asked closing his eyes tightly.

"Because it's true. And I can tell you want me too. It's pretty obvious. I want to get you drunk and fuck you senseless," I told him, giving him a deep kiss so he couldn't say anything just yet to protest me.

"God, I do wanna fuck you. I've wanted nothing else since the day at the watering hole. But I can't. I just fucking can't," he said, stopping our love in momentarily and sitting up, but I was still in his lap basically.

"Why not? Like I said, no one will see us," I told him as I tried to kiss him again.

"I'm afraid if we fuck, I'll fall in love. I can't fall in love with you, Potter. I just can't," he said, moving away from my kisses and trying to scoot me off his lap.

"I'm already in love with you, Malfoy. I can't fucking help it. You did something to me and now you're all I think of. I need you," I said truthfully. Suddenly I wasn't shy anymore and I just knew I needed to tell him everything. I needed him to know how fucking serious I was about him because I wasn't sure I could live without him anymore already, and we had only kissed a few times. What would it be like if we did shag? I'd never be able to leave his side. But I didn't want to.

"This isn't part of the friendship agreement," he laughed slightly as he leaned over and nibbled my earlobe.

I closed my eyes in ecstasy and took a sharp breath in.

"I'm changing the terms. We can be friends with benefits. And I like the benefits part a lot," I admitted as I ran my hands over his chest and I could feel his heart beating quickly underneath my fingertips.

"Friends with benefits eh? I've never had one of those, surprisingly enough. Mostly I just shag and run. What makes you so sure I won't do the same to you?" he asked breathlessly.

"Because you already said you could fall in love with me. And I know you will. If you just give us a shot, I know I could make you happy," I told him sincerely as I grabbed his hair and pulled him in for another wild kiss.

Just then I heard a noise and a little giggle and we both broke apart and looked up to see Hermione creeping slowly through the living room. She was actually tiptoeing.

"Hermione? What are you doing?" I asked with some slight annoyance because I didn't want this make out session to end before I got somewhere good with it.

"I'm trying to get a Coke. I didn't know you guys would be making out. I'm sorry! I'll hurry and leave," she said apologetically, still stifling a giggle.

"What's so funny?" I asked her with confusion.

"Nothing. It's just I've never seen two blokes kiss in real life. It's kind of hot," she giggled and covered her face.

"Hot eh? You wanna come join us?" Draco drawled as he gave her his best sexy look.

Part of me was angry he'd ask her that, but another part of me just thought it was funny because I knew she'd never do it. But I knew Draco wanted her too, so this would be like his dream come true if she did say yes.

"What would you do if I said yes?" she teased him and batted her eyes.

"I'd say, get your cute ass over here and join the fun," he smiled at her widely.

"She's not joining us!" I chimed in and pleaded with Hermione to just hurry up and go with my eyes.

"But what if she really wants to? I don't want to deprive a sweet girl what she wants," Draco said undressing Hermione with his eyes.

I'll admit it. I was fucking jealous. Like overly so. I said I wouldn't be, but I was. I had just declared my love for him and how much I wanted him, and now he was trying to get Hermione in bed with us. I was feeling bold tonight, but not _that_ bold.

"Dream on, Malfoy. Never gonna happen. I don't do three ways," Hermione said with a laugh. "In fact, these days, I don't do two ways either just because I can't find anyone suitable," she added with a sigh.

"I'm suitable," he said with a grin.

"Yeah, okay. You're making out with my best friend on my living room floor and you think that makes you appealing to me?" she scoffed.

"I think you're highly curious about what it'd be like to just jump in the middle of this. Your wheels are turning," he told her.

"No they aren't!"

I didn't like this conversation and really just wanted Hermione to get her drink and leave. So I voiced that opinion.

"Um, Hermione just wants to get a drink and go back upstairs. Leave her alone, okay? Then we can go back to what we were doing,"

"Is that what you want, Hermione? To just go back upstairs and leave us down here making out without you?" he asked giving her a good seductive look.

"Yes, that's what I want. You're awful, Draco. You're trying to get me interested while you've got Harry sitting on your lap. How do you think that makes him feel?" she asked, and I was relieved she understood my plight.

"Harry doesn't mind. We have an arrangement. I already told him you were fair game. It's cool," Draco said casually.

But it really wasn't cool with me. I was upset. And I never really ever said I didn't care he liked Hermione. It was more of a case that I knew the feeling wasn't mutual so it didn't seem very threatening. But right at this moment, it did feel threatening. And Draco was being sort of a pig again.

"Even if Harry doesn't mind, I do. So just forget it," she scoffed and walked through the room and went to the kitchen.

Draco sighed and shook his head.

"Do you know how hot it'd be to have a threesome with her? My god. I think I'd die."

"You really want a threesome? For real?" I asked with some deflation of my good mood.

"I'd do it, that's for sure," he said simply.

"Really?"

"Yeah."

"But what about fucking just me? Would you do that? You never answered me."

"I don't know. Maybe. I don't know, Harry."

"Why are you being all weird now? We were having a hot time and now that Hermione walked in the room, you're all strange now. I don't get you," I said with exasperation.

Just then, Hermione came back out with a Coke in her hands. She tried to breeze past without interrupting us, but Draco just ignored me and focused on her.

"Last chance to jump on in here," he called out to her.

She just flipped him off but he was having none of that. He laughed and shoved me off his lap and got up to grab her playfully. But she screamed and tried to run away from him and he just grabbed her around the waist and pulled her to him.

"I'm going to corrupt you! You know you want me and Harry both. It'll be hot. You'll see," he said trying not to laugh.

"Let me go! God you're horrible!" she cried, but her laughter tipped us off that she was having fun. And I just seethed with anger. This was NOT how I envisioned this night when Draco and I were making out. But Hermione's presence was running it all. I loved my best friend, and it wasn't her fault, but right now I wish a big bird would fly in the window and just carry her away or something. Anything to get rid of her and get her away from Draco. But they playfully kept wrestling around and he picked her up and threw her on the couch and then jumped on her himself. He was straddling her and threatening to kiss her, but she kept saying no and then he asked me to help him.

"Harry, you kiss her! She wants you anyways!" he laughed to me.

"I'm not in the mood to play games, Draco. Stop it and just let her go," I said flatly trying to hide my annoyance.

"Oh Harry, it's just a spot of fun. Draco is being silly. I'm sure he doesn't really want a threesome. He's being a pain in the ass," Hermione said, trying to make me feel better.

"I bet he really does want one. And I'm not sure where that leaves me," I said somewhat dejectedly.

"It leaves you being part of the best sex fest of the year," Draco informed me.

"I was thinking of a smaller sex fest with less people," I admitted.

"You can go wank off if you want to, but Hermione and I are having fun," he said, diving into Hermione's neck and kissing it roughly and playfully.

I was sick to my stomach. I hated this. I hated both of them right now. She was playing into it and he was the one who started it. But she did finally shove him back and she threatened to dump her Coke on his head if he didn't keep his lips off her. He just found it funny, but off my hurt expression he decided to kiss me quickly, but passionately. And then he smiled and kissed Hermione before either of us really knew what he was doing.

"Draco, what are you doing?" Hermione asked, pushing him back.

"Sorry, I was just acting on my lustful feelings. I wanted to see what it'd be like to kiss you both."

"Well I don't want to kiss you, so stop," Hermione told him giving me an apologetic look.

"Right now, I don't want to kiss you either. You're being annoying," I told him. "We were having a nice time and then you ruined it."

"Who ruined it? Me? Or Hermione?" Draco asked me.

"Hermione didn't do anything but walk in the room! Don't lay this on her."

"Yeah, don't lay this on me. In fact, stop laying on me altogether. Get off me, Draco," she said, suddenly realizing he was still straddling her and she could now see how upset it was making me.

"I don't wanna get off you," he said with a devious grin.

"Fine. Want some of my Coke?" she asked as she opened it up and it exploded in Draco's face. She knew it had been jostled and shaken up from all the playful attacking each other and she drenched him. It was rather hilarious to see his Coke covered face.

"You little bitch!" he laughed and grabbed the can out of her hands and poured it on her face. She screamed again and shoved him back and off of her until he landed almost on top of me on the floor.

"You totally had that coming, Malfoy!" I laughed right along with Hermione who was trying to wipe her face off.

"Attack him Harry!" Hermione said as she jumped off the couch and jumped on Draco's back.

"Attack him how? I don't have my wand with me!" I said frantically.

"I didn't mean attack him with your wand, I just meant tickle him or something! He deserves to pay for dumping a Coke on me!"

"Oh, tickle him. I'll do that!" I said deviously as Draco looked panicked. Apparently he was quite ticklish.

And I really went to town on his sides and his ribs and he was laughing and flailing around with Hermione still on his back and he was trying to run away from me, but Hermione was weighing him down. She was assaulting him with tickles under his arms and I had his sides, and it looked like he was going to freak out at any second. He finally got away from me and flung Hermione off his back and onto the couch, but we both just chased after him around the living room. But he had his wand and he pulled it out and aimed it at us.

"Okay no more tickling! Draco does not like to be tickled! I will end both of you!" he threatened us.

"Now he's talking about himself in the third person," I laughed slightly and Hermione giggled. "He must really mean business."

"Draco doesn't like to be tickled," Hermione mocked him and tried to stifle her giggles.

"I'm dead serious. I will turn you both into frogs if you don't stop tickling me!" he shouted, but his devious smile gave away the fact that he was in fact enjoying himself. Even if he probably didn't wish to be tickled anymore.

"We'll stop if you'll stop this nonsense about a threesome," I told him seriously.

"Yeah, I'm not shagging anyone, much less both of you at the same time. This isn't a porno," Hermione scoffed as she crossed her arms and stared him down.

"Alright, alright. I get it. I was really just playing," he held up his hands.

"No you weren't. You were serious. Don't try to backpedal now," I said giving him a dirty look.

"Well okay, so I was serious. But I can see no one else is on board so I'll shut up. But I have to admit, I'm not sure which one of you is the better kisser," he added, probably just to piss me off.

"My kissing skills are quite good. But you stole that kiss from me! I didn't want to kiss you," Hermione told him and gave me an apologetic look.

"Then imagine how good you'd be if you wanted to kiss me," Draco grinned.

"What about me? I'm still standing here. Aren't I a good kisser too?" I piped up.

"You're very good, Harry," Hermione smiled at me, and I'd almost forgotten we'd kissed before.

"Yes, you are good, Harry," Draco agreed.

"My god, we've all kissed each other. This is so weird," Hermione said shaking her head in disbelief.

"It is kind of weird," I agreed.

"I think it's hot. Don't you all think it's hot?" Draco wondered.

"Ugh. I'm going to clean myself up and get rid of this Coke all over me. You and Harry go back to what you were doing and just forget me. Please. I beg of you. I just want to take a hot bath and get back to my book," Hermione said giving me a nudge and a smile, trying really hard to be a good friend to me. I knew she felt badly that her presence sort of fucked up my game, but it was her house too. She had every right to go get a drink when she wanted one. I should have taken Draco to my room instead.

"Fine, leave. But you'll be missing out. And the offer still stands if you change your mind," Draco told her, refusing to give up.

"Goodnight you two."

"Goodnight Hermione."

"Goodnight. Don't say I didn't warn you that you missed out on something amazing!" Draco called after her.

But she just disappeared up the stairs and I was thankful to have her out of the room. I looked at Draco who still had Coke in his hair and his face appeared all sticky.

"Do you want to wash up in the bathroom? It's down the hall and to the left," I instructed him.

"Yeah, I better. I can't believe she doused me with Coke. Little vixen," he chuckled to himself and took off down the hallway.

I just sat on the floor and held my face in my hands. I didn't know what was happening or what would happen, if anything. The moment was kind of lost. I wasn't sure if we could get it back again, or if Draco even wanted to get it back. He was so difficult to understand and he was driving me batty already and we'd barely made a go of things. He was a puzzle I wanted to solve though. I just didn't know if he wanted me to solve him or not.

When he got out of the bathroom his hair was all wet and slicked back and his face no longer seemed a sticky mess. But I noted the hair looked like early Draco circa twelve years old and I made a joke about it.

"I don't know if I can stand you with that slicked back hair. It's like you're back at Hogwarts teasing me again," I noted with a small smile.

"My hair always starts out looking like this but then it dries and falls into my face. I don't use gel anymore," He chuckled back.

"Well I like what it usually looks like. It's pretty hot," I admitted.

"Thanks Potter."

"So now that Hermione's gone, should we go back to discussing what's happening between us?" I blurted out, not willing to wait any longer.

"I rather thought you would have had enough of my antics by now. Does nothing scare you off?" he wondered curiously.

"You did all that to scare me off?"

"Not entirely, but I kind of figured it would have that effect on you, yeah."

"Did you want it to scare me away?"

"Kind of."

"I don't understand you. One minute things are great and the next minute you want them stopped? Make up your mind," I told him somewhat angrily.

"I can't make up my mind! Don't you see?"

"You're almost bi-polar or something. Hot one minute, cold the next. It doesn't make any real sense!" I said with exasperation.

"I never claimed to make sense. Look, I enjoyed our little make out sesh a lot, but I think I'm over it now," he shrugged.

"Like hell," I said without thinking and I just grabbed him into another kiss and shove him against the wall.

He didn't even try to protest, which made me think this is what he wanted all along. He just probably didn't think I had the balls to do it. And a week ago, I wouldn't have. But I'd found my confidence again when it came to him. And he couldn't drag me down. I refused to let him just shrug away our time together. I was growing ever more bold as the days passed and it was a side of me I hadn't quite seen before. Confidence when it came to relationships. That was a new thing Harry-wise and I'd have to get used to it. I just felt confident because of the things he'd already said to me, even if I questioned at times if he really meant them or not.

But he played into this kiss and grabbed me up tighter and my hands roamed his body, as my lips broke free of his and traveled down the side of his neck. He kept his eyes closed and murmured my name softly. It was music to my ears to know I had this power over the great Draco Malfoy. He was helpless against my kisses, and when I finally broke free to look at him, he had a dreamy look in his eyes.

"You really over the make out session now?" I asked breathlessly into his ear.

"Hmm, I wasn't quite as over it as I thought," he smiled almost shyly and grabbed me this time and we flew back onto the couch. I landed roughly on top of him and he kissed me feverishly.

It was so good, that I swore if anyone came walking through the living room this time, I'd just curse them instantly without even asking who it was. Of course I didn't have my wand with me still. But I'd borrow Draco's. Anything to stop someone else from intruding. And I wondered how far he was prepared to take this. His hands were roaming, just like mine were, but they never went near the promised land. I think we were both too nervous and shy to do that. But someone was going to have to eventually, right? So I decided it should be me. I reached down and stuck my hand on top of Draco's erection, even though it was over his clothes. I wasn't quite ready to go inside his pants yet. But I touched him over his trousers and it felt like heaven. So hard and so big in my hand. I wanted to put it in my mouth. But before I could form a coherent fantasy, Draco pulled back and away from me.

"Whoa. Slow down a little," he said somewhat awkwardly.

"Slow down? I wasn't doing anything much," I explained softly.

"Yeah, well it was a little too much for me. I need you to stop," he said more firmly, and I could tell he was on the verge of a freak out. He was panicking. I'd gone too far and now he was having a panic attack. I didn't even know Draco Malfoy could have one of those. But he could. And he was.

He was breathing heavy and not from excitement and he was clutching at his chest like he was having a heart attack.

"Oi, I think I'm dying," he said with terror in his eyes.

"It's just a panic attack. I've had one before. It's gonna be okay," I told him soothingly.

"A bloody panic attack? I don't get panic attacks," he scoffed, rubbing his neck and breathing too rapidly. "I think I'm going to pass out."

"You'd rather believe you were dying that believe it was a panic attack," I asked with a small smile as I rubbed his back gently.

"It'd be manlier to be dying than having an anxiety attack. But to die in your arms, I think my father would reach into the afterlife and kill me again. Promise you won't let me die while sucking your dick or something. Dress me back up and pretend I was just having dinner or something okay" he told me frantically, clutching at my shirt.

"Okay, okay. But I wouldn't worry about that. You're not gonna die. And your dad is not going to find anything out. You're safe here."

"You must think I'm such a prat huh? I'm all talk. I talk a good game, like I'd do anything or fuck anyone and here I am having a panic attack over the idea of us together. You can't tell anyone, Potter! My whole life is built on the premise of me being a prick who sleeps around and does anything and anyone. I can't ruin my reputation," he pleaded with me.

"I knew it was all just an act. On the inside you're more scared than me. You just tried to pretend you weren't," I said, giving him a small kiss on the forehead.

"It mostly is an act. Some of it's real. But a lot of stuff I just say it or do it to be shocking," he admitted softly.

"Well it works. Most of the time anyway. Sometimes I just know you're full of shit," I grinned slightly.

"Like when?"

"Like the whole threesome thing. I know you'd never do it. You'd freak the fuck out if Hermione and I got naked and said, 'come at us, big boy!'" I laughed.

"Shut up. I wouldn't freak the fuck out if that happened. In fact, that would be less confusing. Because I could be very focused on Hermione and you'd just be a bonus naked person in the mix."

"A bonus naked person? Thanks a lot!" I scoffed, feeling hurt by his reaction even if he was slightly playing with me. But the truth was, he'd feel better if there was a girl in the mix and not just me to focus on, because he didn't want to accept the gay part of himself. And that hurt me, even if it was less about me and more about his own hang ups.

"I'd be happy you were there and naked! Don't get me wrong. It's just it'd be easier with Hermione. I know what to do with her," he admitted.

"And you don't know what to do with me, is that it?" I asked curiously.

"Not exactly. I mean, I'm not daft. I know what we're supposed to do. I just don't know if I'm ready for the entirety of that," he admitted.

"I thought you said a blowie was a blowie? You'd let someone do that no matter who they were," I pointed out.

"I did say that. And I meant that. But wouldn't you expect one back?" he wondered quietly.

"I'd like one back, sure. But you don't have to. I'm perfectly willing to give and not receive if that makes you more comfortable," I said sincerely. I would love nothing more than to receive love from him, but if he was too nervous or scared, it was okay. I could understand it and look past it.

"Let's just not go there, okay. I-I can't go there right now. In fact, I should just go home," he said standing up from the couch and smoothing down his clothes.

"Wait! If you go now, am I going to see you again?" I wondered.

"Of course. You see me at work," he smiled slightly.

"That's not what I meant. I meant, actually see you. We're supposed to be friends, remember?"

"I remember, although it's you who seemed to have forgotten that. Attacking me with your lips like that," he scolded me playfully.

"I seem to remember you attacking right back," I reminded him.

"Well I've had enough for one night. I really should go," he said solemnly.

"We never even had a drink," I recalled trying to keep him here longer.

"Raincheck."

"Okay."

"It was a fun evening," he said coming over to me and brushing the hair out of my eyes.

"It was fun," I agreed.

And with that he just stepped back and apparated out of the house and left me wanting on the couch. Yep, he was a puzzle. He lived to drive me insane, I suspect. And he certainly knew how to be a tease. I just laid my head on the side of the couch and sighed. Hermione peeked her head down the stairs just then and asked if I was alone.

"Afraid so," I called up after her.

She came walking down slowly and saw me moping.

"I heard the cracking sound when Draco left. I wasn't sure what happened. I expected him to stay longer," she said as she came and sat down next to me and played with my hair.

"I thought he'd stay longer too, but I think I freaked him out. I touched him in a personal area and he literally had a panic attack and started talking about his father finding him dead with my dick in his mouth. It was a disaster. He's really scared of his dad," I lamented.

"Well one day he won't be. He'll learn to stand up for himself and what he wants," she said soothingly.

"Eh, I don't know. He's afraid to lose the money. He told me he's really afraid of his father," I explained to her.

"I'd be afraid of him too. But Draco's a grown man," she protested.

"That's what I said! But apparently he's a grown man who still needs his daddy's money really bad."

"I think he's just making excuses. He's scared. He's a scared little prat. And I'm sorry he's playing with your emotions. I warned you though. That's why I didn't want him to be our friend. I knew you'd want more and I was right," she said.

"I know, you were right. I do want more. And I thought I'd gotten to the root of his problem with his dad, but it didn't really help for very long."

"I'm sorry. Maybe he's just not the right one? He's so strange, really. All that talk about a threesome? Please," Hermione scoffed.

"It was kind of funny though, when I think back on it," I admitted halfheartedly.

"You were so mad, Harry. I could tell. That's why I tried to put an end to it all."

"I know. You tried. But you seemed to be having fun for a while," I admitted with some annoyance.

She sighed.

"Okay, so it was kind of fun for me for a while. But not when I realized you were getting angry. I thought it was just Draco screwing around. I certainly never took his offer seriously!" she assured me.

"I know that. It's just he likes you. And I know why. If I weren't this way, I'd feel the same for you," I told her with a small smile.

"I'm flattered. But you don't have to say that. We're friends. And I know we'll only just be friends. But I love you, Harry. I hate seeing you sad," she ruffled my hair slightly.

"I hate being sad."

"Just forget about Draco."

"I'll try."

But I knew I wasn't going to be able to do that. It was impossible. He was inside me now. Worming his way into my heart. And I couldn't ever let him go without a fight.

To be continued….


	7. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer:** I own none of the characters here. JK Rowling and company own them. I merely play with them for my own amusement. Please don't sue. I have nothing of value anyway.

 **Summary:** Harry is caught in a love triangle to rival all else. He's found himself questioning his sexuality and is owning up to his attraction to Draco Malfoy. Meanwhile Draco is cozying up to Hermione, who won't give him the time of day. And Hermione keeps thinking there's hope for her and Harry to have a future together. It's a tangled web of emotions and will anyone get what they want? Set a couple of years after Hogwarts ended. Told from Harry's POV. Drarry, with undertones of Harmony and Dramione.

 **Three is a Crowd**

I wasn't going to let another week go by without seeing Draco, so I made it a point to be in his way at work. At lunch times, he couldn't escape me, because I was right there under his nose. He was semi-exasperated with me at first and tried to get me to go away, but he finally relented when he saw that I wasn't going anywhere. The only problem was, I usually ate with Hermione so she was standing dutifully by my side as well. Which was less good for me. But I couldn't be heartless and tell her she was on her own because I was chasing some hot man ass through the cafeteria. She understood my plight though and promised she wouldn't let him flirt. She'd shut him down really fast and actually get angry if need be, instead of just brushing it off like she usually did.

Today when Draco saw us coming at him with our lunch trays he just rolled his eyes and sat back in his chair with his arms above his head.

"Well, well, it's my little following of groupies. Come to eat lunch with me?" he asked with a chuckle.

"Yes, I'm not letting you ignore me this time, Draco." I announced as I sat down across from him with Hermione.

"What about you, sweetheart? You don't want me to ignore you either?" he asked Hermione.

"I'm just here for Harry. I don't want to eat alone."

"Pity. We could have a nice time if you were here for me," he said with a seductive look.

"Just cut the crap, Malfoy. We all know who's tongue was in your mouth the other night and it wasn't Hermione's," I said boldly and with a little sideways grin at having gotten him good.

He sat forward in his chair.

"Keep your fucking voice down, will you? People will hear stuff!" he chided me angrily.

"So what? I'm not going to be ignored."

"God do you know who you sound like? That psycho lady from Fatal Attraction. You need to dial it down a bit," Draco informed me, and I suppose he was right. That wasn't the look I was going for. Psycho stalker. I just wanted him to acknowledge me and be friends like we promised.

"Okay, sorry. Bad choice of words. But I still wanna be your friend, you know? And friends don't ignore each other at lunch. They sit together and talk," I explained.

"Right. Okay. I have some other people I usually sit with though," he mentioned.

"Where are they?" I wondered idly.

"They're over there. Looking at me strangely, wondering why I'm sitting with you two. I'll just have to make something up about work needing to be discussed. Or that I'm dating Hermione. That would work," he chimed in as he reached over and tried to take her hand, but she pulled it away.

"Nice try, Malfoy. But I'm not dating you. We've already had this conversation," she said with a sigh as she dug into her food.

"Well I'm certainly not holding hands with Potter over the table. Everyone would make fun of me for the rest of my life," he scoffed.

"Thanks a lot, Draco. That makes me feel real good. So you're saying you'd never hold hands with me in public?" I asked somewhat sadly.

"Of course not. Besides, you said we could be affectionate in _private_. Remember? Remember my dear old dad and his spies? Well don't think they aren't inside here too. In fact, my usual friends I think are his spies. They'll probably report back to him today about me not sitting with them. My life is way more complicated than yours," he explained.

He was right that I said we could only be affectionate in private. I did say that. And meant it. But the actuality of it kind of sucks. To be something or someone that your lover is ashamed of? It hurts. It feels like we're living back in the Dark Ages when people covered this shit up or else they'd lose their jobs or their families. But these days people were so much more accepting. But not Draco's family. They were the very definition of old fashioned. They'd never understand. And I knew that just as much as Draco knew it.

"If it's really going to get you into trouble with your dad, we could leave and sit someplace else," I offered in a small voice.

"Nah, it's fine. I'll come up with an excuse. But you honestly didn't expect us to play footsie under the table or hold hands, did you?" he asked me curiously.

"No, I didn't expect that. I'm not daft. I just wanted to hang out as friends. Like we promised we'd be."

"Yeah, well you're a shitty friend when you've got your lips and hands all over me. Is that what he does to you in private, Hermione? Make out with you?" he teased.

"No. Although I sort of wish he would. But Harry has never made out with me. Other than that kiss you forced on us, we've never gotten frisky. Sorry to burst your bubble," Hermione informed him with a tinge of regret in her voice.

"What's wrong with you, Potter? Hermione would be willing, you know? You'd just have to grab her and kiss her until she couldn't breathe anymore. She'd be putty in your hands," Draco told me seriously.

"But I'm gay. Why would I want that?" I asked shaking my head.

"Don't say that too loud! Someone will hear you!" he told me, looking around at other tables.

"So what?" I said with confusion.

"Look it's cool to say it in private or even in public where there's nothing but Muggles around. But at WORK? Are you out of your mind?" he asked with wide eyes.

"God Draco, you're such a homophobe these days. You started out like, 'oh I'd let a dude suck my dick!' and now you're like, 'don't say the word gay in front of company!' What is your damage?" I asked, not understanding him at all.

"Look, there's a time and a place for everything. And work is a _professional_ environment where we don't talk about being gay or the sex we had last Tuesday with some blonde from a bar. We're supposed to be _professionals_ talking about _work_. And that's it," he explained.

"Since when? I hear people talking about all kinds of shit in the elevators and the hallways. And you had sex last Tuesday with a blonde in a bar?" I asked, not liking the sound of that.

Draco shrugged.

"Might have. But it doesn't matter. My father said work was for work. And private time was when you gossiped or talked about personal things. Like in the lounge at the house. He'd invite his cronies over and they'd drink Cognac and smoke cigars and talk about things my young ears weren't supposed to hear. But sometimes I'd sneak in and hide under the piano and I heard all sorts of strange things. Most of them I didn't understand because I didn't know what blow jobs were or what swingers parties were, but now I know. And god do I wish I didn't know, but that's beside the point. _That's_ where you talk about shit like that," Draco explained in one breath.

"Swingers parties? Do I even want to know?" I asked trying to stifle laughter.

"It wasn't _my_ parents! Thank god. But it was someone's parents. And they'd never dream of talking about that outside the lounge."

"I don't have a fucking cognac and cigar lounge in my house. Where are we supposed to talk about this stuff?" I wondered.

"Your bloody living room is good enough. I just meant, not at work. Give me some dignity."

"Fine. Dignity. You act as if being gay means you're less of a man or less of a person. It doesn't mean that. And you need to understand that," I said whispering as to not alert anyone to our conversation.

"You know, you two lot fight and bicker like two old marrieds already. You're worse than Harry and I," she said to Draco with a laugh.

"We do not fight like old marrieds," he scoffed.

"Do too. All you do is fight and then make out in my living room," she pointed out, as she finished her salad.

"Bite your tongue," Draco said giving her a look.

"I call it how I see it," she shrugged.

"We really do bicker a lot," I pointed out with a grin.

"That's because you're impossible to get along with!"

"Am not."

"Are too."

"Am not!"

"Are too!"

"Okay, enough! You both suck sometimes," Hermione sighed holding up her hands.

"Alright maybe we do bicker a lot," Draco conceded in a small voice. "But we're not married."

"Yet," I grinned, just trying to get under his skin.

"Potter, I will hex you. Right in the middle of this cafeteria," he threatened me.

"I'm quaking in my boots, Malfoy."

"You should be."

"Last time I fought you I disarmed you in a second," I told him.

"Last time you really fought me, I ended up bloody and broken on a bathroom floor. Thanks for that, by the way. I never had a chance to say thanks for fucking my shit up like that," he said somewhat bitterly.

"I didn't know what that spell did!" I said defensively.

"Great! So why not try it out on Draco, right? Stupid prat. Thank god Snape was there to fix me."

"I'm sorry about that. But it only further proves you don't want to hex me because I'll win," I pointed out.

"You cheat."

"I do not cheat! How can you cheat at spells?"

"You use weird ones or unforgiveable ones. That's cheating. I'm trying to fight fair and I get sliced up!"

"Excuse me? Fight fair? I seem to recall you were about to crucio me, mate. That's not exactly fighting fair," I reminded him.

"I didn't know what else to do to you!"

"Oh my god, stop it! Old marrieds. I'm telling you. If you don't shag each other soon, one of you is going to kill the other one!" Hermione scoffed and stood up from the table and marched off.

We just sat there for a second and realized we were fighting way too much for normal humans. It was just our way of getting the sexual tensions out without actually having sex. Only Draco refused to acknowledge that and said Hermione was smoking crack. And then he got up to leave too, and it was just me sitting there alone with my untouched lunch. But I wasn't hungry anymore. So I just tossed it away and went back to my desk early.

Friday came upon us, and it didn't really take that long before everyone was gossiping about the newest threesome in the cafeteria. Draco never went back to his usual friends and we all there would sit in the caf and eat our lunch and laugh and fight and talk smack to each other. There was also a lot of flirting, to my dismay between Draco and Hermione, but he always started it. She would try and shut it down, but sometimes I caught her playing along with him. It made me wonder if she really liked him more than she said she did. After all, she did want to date him until I told her how I felt. Maybe I was standing in the way of true love between the two of them? Maybe Draco wasn't really into me as much as I thought and he really did want her? I wasn't sure. I was more concerned about whether or not she wanted him. And sometimes I swore she did. And it wasn't that she was being a bad friend, it was just that I don't think she could help herself. Draco was charming, even if an asshole at times. And I was worried he'd managed to worm his way into Hermione's heart as well as my own. That would just be a huge disaster. But I tried not to dwell on it because she said they were just friends and nothing more.

But it was Halloween today and we were discussing what our plans should be. Go to a bar, pass out candy to trick or treaters, or go to a party Draco knew of. We couldn't really decide. Hermione wanted to pass out the candy, I wanted the bar, and Draco wanted the party. Sure, we could have all split up and gone our separate ways, but we wanted to spend the night together. So we agreed to a compromise. We'd do all three. We'd pass out candy early, then shut off the lights and go to the party for a while, then end up at the bar. It seemed like a perfect plan. Hermione was dressed like a sexy fairy and had sparkly wings and a tattered lace skirt with flesh colored fishnet stockings and heels. She was gorgeous, even I had to admit. I'm gay, but not blind. And when Draco came to our door and saw her, he almost fell over. She had a corset style top on that pushed everything God gave her up under her chin and even if she was a smaller chested woman, she didn't look it in this outfit. Draco had to roll his tongue back into his mouth before he could even say hello. Which he did by saying trick or treat and holding out his hands for some candy, as he leaned over and gave Hermione a small kiss on the cheek. I seethed as I watched them and cursed myself for being the dirty little secret. The two of them together were so utterly ordinary it hurt. And me and Draco, well that was shameful to him. And I hated it.

For Draco's costume, he chose to be a vampire. His hair was slicked back, this time with gel, and he had a suit on with a cape. He had blood on his lips and white powder on his face. He looked incredibly handsome too. And I had to admit to myself that he and Hermione made a stunning couple. It made me want to throw up though. I hoped they wouldn't end up together. For my part, I was dressed like a mummy with bandages around my arms and legs and my head. I realized now as I caught my reflection in a mirror, that I looked ridiculous. I didn't look sexy at all. Mummy's weren't sexy. Leave it to me to wrap myself in old bandages while Draco wore a polished suit and Hermione wore a corset and fishnet stockings. Just the probabilities alone of who was going to hook up at the end of the night excluded me entirely.

When Draco walked up to me he gave me a once over then he chuckled slightly.

"What are you supposed to be, Potter? A tampon?" he asked with a sneer on his face.

"Fuck you. I'm a mummy."

"I think it's funnier if you're a tampon."

God, this night was gonna suck. Every time I thought it wouldn't suck, it sucked. And it was all because of Draco. Why did I even like him at all?

"You're the one who likes to suck blood, so maybe you're the tampon," I shot back at him lamely.

"Eww. That's going too far. I suck _neck_ blood. Let's be very clear about that. And vampires _are_ sexy. Tampons, or rather, mummies are not."

"I was going for scary, not sexy. I didn't realize we were supposed to be sexy," I admitted.

"Sure, everyone knows that. It's the only way to get laid on Halloween. The women dress slutty and the men try and dress as sexy as possible to scoop them up."

"But I'm not looking to scoop up a slutty cheerleader or whatever," I informed him.

"There's still time to change. You should be something better. Like a sports star. Put on your Quidditch robes," he told me.

"But no one knows what Quidditch is at the Muggle bar," I reminded him.

"So? We're not going there until last and everyone will be too drunk to care what you are," he informed me. "Now go put on the robes. You'll look better. And bring your broom too!"

I trudged halfway up the stairs and then I looked back and saw Draco grab Hermione's butt and she smacked him away but she was laughing way too much. If she was really pissed, like she should have been, she would have pulled out her wand or punched him in the face. I did not like this scene, so I interrupted it.

"Draco! Help me find my robes upstairs. I don't know where I put them," I said, and it wasn't a complete lie. I hadn't worn them in years. They were in a dusty box somewhere.

"Find them yourself! Hermione and I are handing out candy!" he called back up to me.

"I really need help!"

"Go help him," Hermione nudged Draco.

He rolled his eyes and followed me up the stairs.

"You do realize I was making some headway with Hermione and you ruined it, yet again," he sighed.

"Did I now? Hmm, sorry about that," I said not looking back at him because I had a devious grin on my face. I was pleased with my handiwork.

Once we got to my room, I realized it was the first time he'd ever been in there. It wasn't anything special and it certainly hadn't been witness to anything interesting in its days as my room, but I hoped to change all that.

"Can you help me get these bandages off?" I asked him, hoping he'd enjoy undressing me, or rather unwrapping me. But he just pulled out his wand and everything unraveled and fell to the floor. I wasn't anticipating that. "Er, thanks." I muttered unhappily.

"I don't see why you need me up here. I don't know where your bloody robes are," he told me.

"You could at least help me look. They're in my closet somewhere," I told him as I opened it up and started rooting through it.

"God you have a lot of crap," he noted.

"I know. I don't like to throw stuff out. I never had anything growing up so I like to keep mementos of things," I admitted.

"I hate clutter. My flat is clutter free and I know where everything is."

"Do you know where your Quidditch robes are?" I asked curiously.

"Of course. I have them on my wall," he smiled proudly.

"Your wall? You display them like trophies, of which you never won," I asked with a smirk.

"I'm proud of my Quidditch skills. What can I say? Maybe I never won the cup, but I was a damn fine player."

"Yeah, you were formidable. I'll hand you that. But I always was better," I grinned.

He stuck his tongue out at me for that and I just leaned over and kissed him before he could stop me.

"Don't Potter. I thought I said we were friends," he protested.

"We are. But you also said in private I could do stuff like that. And it doesn't get much more private than my bedroom," I informed him, moving closer, like a cat stalking its prey.

"Don't do it," he said giving me a look and back up away from me, but he wasn't moving very fast.

I got right in his face and asked him to tell me to stop again. He just looked at me and smiled.

"You gonna make me stop?" I asked breathlessly inches away from his mouth.

"Maybe."

I leaned forward and kissed him again and this time he didn't try to pretend he didn't want it. He grabbed me up tight and shoved me against my dresser and I felt his hands digging into my arms so hard that I knew he was leaving bruises. And his kisses were just as fervent. Before I even knew what I was really doing, I had broken free from his grasp and was on my knees. I unzipped his pants and pulled out his already hard cock and held it in my hands. It was a sight to behold and I wanted so badly to put it in my mouth and take all of him into me. He didn't look like he was going to stop me either. In fact when I looked up at him he just gave me a smoldering glare.

"Do it," he uttered in the throes of frenzied lust.

And I took his cock into my mouth and began licking it and sucking it hard. To be quite honest, I had no idea what I was doing. I just hoped it felt good. It sure seemed to. He was making sounds and his knees were almost buckling and grabbed a fistful of my hair and held my face down over his cock so I couldn't move really and just had to keep sucking it. Then he sort of thrust his cock into my mouth while holding my head still and basically fucked my mouth. I was in heaven. He tasted so good and he hadn't even cum yet. I could taste the pre-cum and the sweat on his skin and it was glorious. He finally started moaning and gasping and I felt his body tense up and his cum shot into my mouth. I'd never experienced anything like that before and I didn't know exactly what to do except swallow it down and then he loosened his grip on my hair and let his hands fall to his sides. I licked up every last drop of him and then I pulled back and tucked his semi-hard cock back into his pants. Then I looked up at him.

"Did you like that?" I asked hopefully, thinking that this might solidify my spot in the rankings as to who he'd rather be with. Hermione wasn't sucking his dick. But I did. He just stood there with his eyes closed for a minute until he could finally speak.

"That was fucking incredible. You really suck dick like a champ," he patted me on the back lamely.

"Uh, thanks. I guess. It was my first time," I admitted.

"Well you did good. I can barely feel my legs. But let's just keep this between us eh? I don't want Hermione to know okay?" he said conspiratorially.

"What? Why not?" I was confused.

"Because I just don't want her to know," he shrugged.

"Alright. Will you kiss me again now?" I asked hopefully.

"Not unless you gargle or something," he said turning up his nose.

Apparently he didn't want cock mouth in his mouth, even if it was his own damn cock. He made zero sense to me. And I had a feeling that I was going to regret blowing him. But I wanted to so badly. And I know he fucking liked it. He's a huge liar if he said he didn't like it. But now he wants to keep it a secret from Hermione? Fuck that. I was going to tell her the first chance I got. I didn't really care what he said. She was my friend first and friends tell friends things like, I just blew the hot guy we've been hanging out with for weeks.

I went to the bathroom and I gargled with mouthwash, as instructed and then I came out to find Draco in one of my boxes of old stuff and he'd found my invisibility cloak. He'd wrapped it around his shoulders and nothing but his head and his feet were showing.

"Bloody hell. This is fantastic! Did you ever sneak into the girls dorms with this on?" he asked me curiously.

"Uh no. I didn't want to do that. And also, charms repelled boys even invisible ones," I pointed out.

"True. I hadn't thought of that. But what about the girls bathroom? I know for a fucking fact you spent time in the girls bathroom brewing potions with your mates," he said excitedly.

"How'd you know that?" I wondered curiously because I'd never told him that.

"Myrtle told me. If you don't recall, I used to talk to Myrtle a lot. I cried in those fucking bathrooms more than Myrtle herself did. She told me all about you."

"Why'd she tell you about me?"

He shrugged.

"I don't know. To cheer me up. Said you'd probably get in trouble too. Only I knew you weren't going to get in as much trouble as me, seeing as how I was trying to kill someone."

Ugh, I'd momentarily forgotten about that somehow. But leave it to Draco to remind me why I used to hate him so much. But I shook it off and changed the subject.

"So can you put the cloak back? I'm saving it someday in case I ever need it for work. If they ever fucking let me go out on my own that is," I sighed.

He took it off and placed it back in the box and then he pulled out my old Quidditch robes. He held them up.

"Perfect! And they aren't even moth eaten or anything. You're lucky."

I grabbed them up and decided to put the whole ensemble. I stripped off my clothes and grabbed the Quidditch outfit. I noticed Draco staring at my body and he looked interested, but when I looked him in the eyes, he averted them and just turned around and let me have my privacy to change. He was so weird. His dick was just in my mouth and now he was too shy to see my underwear? He was fucking with my head big time and I hated it. But I pulled on the outfit and it was only slightly snugger than I remember it being and the trousers were a little short. I'd grown a little since I'd last worn them. But they were passable.

"How do I look?" I asked curiously holding out my arms.

He turned back around and looked at me.

"Stunning. Perfect. Now that's a sexy outfit."

"Thanks. Yours is sexy too. But you knew that. Except your bloody mouth paint is all smeared now. You look like you've been kissing for sure," I pointed out. "But note how my mouth is clean. I washed it in the bathroom so as not to give away who you'd been kissing. Except I'm afraid your dick probably has makeup all over it," I chuckled.

"Shit. Fuck. I need to wash up. Hermione will know something went down if my face is all smeared." He headed towards the bathroom and I just let him go.

Then I called out to him.

"Why don't you want Hermione to know anyway? Eventually she will. She's our friend too. She'll probably be mad she was out of the loop."

"I don't want her to know I let you suck me off. That's private. Between us. And yes, she's my friend, but she doesn't need to know every detail of my life."

"Fine okay."

I didn't agree with this at all. And like I said before, I was going to tell her whether he liked it or not. I suspected he just didn't want her to know because it'd ruin his chances with her. And I wanted to ruin those chances. I didn't want there to be any chances with her. It was a selfish dick move, I know. But it was one I felt I needed to make. Because really, why would Hermione want a sexually confused boyfriend anyway? If she wanted that, she'd just be with me.

Once Draco got his face cleaned up he realized he had no more face paint and therefore his costume was in jeopardy. So I told him to ask Hermione for red lipstick to borrow. It'd work in a pinch. So we went back downstairs and she was happily handing out candy to little kids, and she noted my change of costume.

"What happened to your mummy costume?"

"Draco said it was lame so I went with Quidditch star instead," I explained.

"But Muggles at the bar won't know what that is," she pointed out.

"I know! That's what I said! But Draco said they'd all be drunk by then and not care what I was."

"Where's your face paint, Draco? Your blood is gone," Hermione noted, giving us both a look.

I just smiled and Draco said he had to wipe it off because it got smudged.

"Smudged huh? I won't even ask how," she laughed slightly, giving me a knowing look.

"Can he borrow some red lipstick?" I asked curiously.

"Yeah sure. Harry? You man the trick or treaters and I'll go upstairs and get the lipstick," she said to me.

"I'm coming with you!" Draco called after her, and before I could protest he was up the stairs after her, leaving me with a line of little kids coming to the door.

It's not that I hated kids or anything, I just felt like I didn't understand them. But I tried to be polite and tell them their costumes were cute as I dumped too much candy into their bags. And then I just seethed because Hermione and Draco were gone for a really long time. Way too long to just be applying lipstick. I wanted to march up there and burst in the room and find out what was going on. But I didn't want to be stupid and I also couldn't leave my post at the door. But finally after eons they emerged from upstairs and Hermione looked different somehow and Draco had perfectly applied red lipstick around his mouth. I looked at her mouth and saw no traces of red. But she looked shaky and wobbly and she looked guilty. That's what I noted first. Guilt. And she wouldn't look at me right away. But Draco had swagger. He looked like he'd just fucked a movie star or something and I immediately began to panic. Were they fucking around behind my back? Was it possible? Would Hermione do that to me? I knew Draco would do it to me in a heartbeat, but would Hermione? I didn't think so, but I wasn't sure and I just kept looking at her and she kept looking away from me. I needed to know what was going on.

"Hermione can I see you in the kitchen for a second?" I asked almost as shrilly as Hermione could be sometimes.

She looked at me like a deer in the headlights and then she just nodded and walked to the kitchen. I looked at Draco.

"You man the candy door, we'll be back."

I walked into the kitchen and looked at her and said to spill it. I knew there was something I didn't know.

She just held her head in her hands.

"Nothing happened! I swear!" she said imploring me to believe her.

"Then why do you look so guilty and Draco looks like he just fucked Miss Universe?"

"He didn't _fuck_ me! God no! He just _kissed_ me. I tried to stop him. I really did! But then I got a little caught up in it. I lost my mind for a moment. Just a _moment_! But then I stopped him and told him no," she explained.

"I sucked his dick when we went upstairs together," I announced unceremoniously just to get it off my chest, especially at this little declaration.

"You did what?"

"You heard me. I sucked his dick. And he liked it! And now he's kissing you? What the fuck is his deal?" I asked with incredible annoyance. Not really with her, but with him. He was playing us both.

"I told you he was nothing but trouble! I warned you, Harry! And I didn't even listen to myself because I let him kiss me. But it was _such_ a good kiss," she added even though it pained her to do so.

"No shit he kisses good. I feel like I can barely breathe when he kisses me," I admitted dreamily.

"And the way he grabs your hair, not too hard, but just enough?" she added excitedly.

"Holy shit, we're both falling for this creep. This can't be real!" I cried, pacing back and forth.

"I'm not falling for him! I-I just liked the kiss! But no, no, no. I will not fall for Draco Malfoy. He's all yours," she held up her hands.

"Face it Hermione. You like him. You can tell me a million times that you don't, but I see you two together. I'm not blind."

"Yeah? Well I didn't suck his dick! I never would do that to you! I mean it. You can have him!"

"You kissed him. That's bad enough."

"No it's not. It's not near bad enough as what you did," she protested.

"But you liked it. That's what counts," I said softly, realizing what a twisted piece of crap my life had become.

"So what if I liked it? I promised you I wouldn't go for him and I won't," she said, near tears.

"Why are you crying?" I wondered curiously.

"I-I'm not crying. I'm just sad. I'm a terrible friend. I didn't mean to be," she admitted, the floodgates opening.

I pulled her towards me and held her tightly. I kissed her forehead.

"No, you're not a terrible friend. Draco is a player. And I think he needs a taste of his own medicine."

"What do you mean?"

"I say we play a trick on him tonight. It is trick or treat after all, isn't it?" I said deviously giving her a look.

"What do you mean?"

"I say you and me are all over each other tonight and we ignore the fuck out of him. He thinks he's all that, but you and me should flirt up a storm and make out right in front of him. He won't even know what's happening!" I exclaimed proudly.

"You want to make out with me?" she asked somewhat hopefully.

"Well for the purposes of getting Draco pissed off. But you know I'd really want to if I wasn't gay," I explained.

"I know. It's just I wouldn't want this to be gross for you," she said softly.

"Gross? Pfft. No. It's not _gross_. I love you. I just normally don't want to stick my tongue down your throat, but it's definitely not _gross_. So don't worry. I just wanna see Draco be confused as hell for once and not know what the fuck to do," I said somewhat evilly.

"I like that plan. I like it a lot. And it's almost time for that party with his friends. He'll be thinking he can get me for sure after that kiss upstairs. But nope!" she laughed with me.

"Alright. Perfect plan. We stick together. And act like we've been a couple for years. He won't know what hit him."

"He could just say fuck both of us and run off with some other girl."

"Nah, he's too invested in us. Trust me."

We held hands and swore to keep up this charade for the entire night, no matter what. Draco might not believe it right away, but we were going to make it convincing if it killed us both to do it. It wasn't much of a hardship for Hermione, but for me it was a little more awkward. But it was my brilliant plan, so I had to stick with it.

When we came out of the kitchen, Hermione smoothed down her clothes and wiped at her mouth to make it seem like we'd been making out. We noticed that Draco noticed her doing it and his eyebrow went up. I just smiled like the cat that swallowed the canary and asked if he was ready to go to the party yet. It was his friends party and he's the one who knew how to get there. He just managed a smile and said sure, and we closed down the fort to trick or treaters and apparated to this party. It was at a big house in the country and it turned out it was Blaise Zabini's place. I didn't really know him, but I remembered him from school. Needless to say we weren't friends. And when he saw me and Hermione he looked kind of disgusted that Draco would bring us along.

"Draco, my man. What gives? Why the stragglers? Potter and Granger? Is this a Halloween trick or something?" he laughed slightly as he half hugged Draco.

"Nah, they're my mates. I realize it's very strange, but we all work together. The past is the past. They're actually not so bad once you get to know them," Draco informed his friend, and I was actually shocked at how well he stood up for us.

Blaise still looked kind of annoyed but then he shook my hand.

"Thanks for saving us, Potter. I never actually thanked you for that," he said awkwardly.

"No worries," I waved it away.

"And Hermione, is it? Nice to see you," he said extending his hand to her and she shook it lightly. "Feel free to mingle. Booze is to the left. Snacks are to the right. Dancing in the middle. Have fun!" And then he walked off.

"Not very friendly, is he?" Hermione said distastefully looking after him.

"He's not so open minded for friends as I am," Draco shrugged.

"You? Open minded about friends? That'll be the day," I scoffed.

"Hey, I'm friends with you lot aren't I? That never would have happened before! If I were any more open minded about the friends I made these days, my whole brain would fall out."

"That's true, honey. He really is more open minded these days about who he keeps company with," Hermione said, snuggling under my arm and giving me a kiss on the cheek.

"Honey?" Draco said looking at us oddly.

We just ignored him.

"Do you want to dance, sweetheart? Or do you want a drink first?" I asked Hermione as I brushed the hair out of her eyes and gazed at her lovingly.

"A drink, then dance!"

"Anything you want, beautiful," I said, and I whisked her away and left Draco in the dust.

I saw him mouthing the word 'beautiful' at me as I smiled at him, and then I just turned my head and went to the drink table.

"Is he confused yet?" Hermione asked as she poured herself some spiked punch.

"Oh yeah, he's getting there," I admitted as I poured my own punch.

"He'll never really believe this," she said as she took a sip of her punch and made a face at how strong it was.

"We're gonna make him believe it," I said determinedly.

We gulped down our drinks and poured a couple more and we were both starting to feel the effects of the alcohol in our system. It just made me less inhibited and a better actor. I was dancing with Hermione like I really wanted her and I think everyone around us was fooled. I heard people gossiping about how they didn't realize we were together and a couple, and I just smiled and let them think that. I kissed Hermione several times on the lips, even if it was maybe a little tamer than it could have been since I didn't use my tongue, but it was enough that other people's tongues were wagging. And we spied Draco just standing in a corner unable to believe his eyes. He had a glass of punch and he was drinking it while intently staring us down with a look in his eyes that can only be described as murderous. I hadn't seen that look in his eyes since he stomped on my face in the train car that one time. It felt pretty good.

But then he marched over to us and grabbed both of our shoulders and pulled us off the dancefloor.

"What the fuck are you two doing?" he asked not so kindly.

"What do you mean? We're dancing?" I said giving him a look like I had no idea what he meant.

"You're also kissing. And groping. Since when do you two do that?" he asked with a raised eyebrow.

"I'm kinda drunk, so I dunno. I figured maybe I really am straight? And Hermione wants me, so we're just giving it a good go," I shrugged and slurred my words more than necessary to make it seem like I was drunker than I was.

"Yeah, Harry said he fancied me and wanted to try it out. So I said, why not? So far, so good. Right pumpkin?" she asked giving my nose a little kiss.

"Definitely good," I smiled widely and pulled her in for a real kiss this time. I knew it had to be good in order to fool Draco so I used my tongue even though it pained me to do so. It wasn't gross, per say, it just felt wrong to kiss her in such a manner. But we were both troopers about it.

When we pulled back, Draco was just staring at us both. Then he smirked and shook his head.

"I get it. This is a game. And I'm the one being played. You two are fucking with me. I'm not daft. I know this isn't real," he said confidently.

"It is real! I love Harry!" Hermione said as she kissed my ear and actually sent involuntary shivers up my spine.

"It's true. I'm straight. I was confused before but now I'm not," I said trying to keep a serious face.

"Bollocks! You lot are fucking with me! God damn it. I actually believed it. For a minute! Not for long. But you got me. I thought you'd both gone mad," he laughed. "I wager the two of you spoke to one another then and found out I double dipped?" he said in a small voice.

"You did more than double dip, whatever the hell that means! You kissed me after letting Harry, you know what! I'm not gonna say it out loud, but you let him do it! And then you said you wanted me. You're a filthy player!" Hermione said breaking character as the jig was up and Draco was no fool.

"I'm sorry! I just can't fucking decide who or what I want! It's too hard!"

"Well you can't keep fooling around with both of us!" I shouted over the din of the crowd.

"You two are just as fucking guilty though! You keep _letting_ me!" Draco pointed out and we realized we had no good witty comeback for that.

We were _letting_ him do it. I knew he wanted Hermione too, and she knew I wanted Draco and Draco wanted everyone and everything and all of us kept falling into the trap. It was madness. And it had to end. Only I didn't know how to make it end. I wanted Draco so much. But I know I deserved better than to be someone's dirty secret. And Hermione? I think she wanted Draco just a tad more than she was letting on. And the feeling was quite mutual. And I didn't know what else I should do except maybe step back and just let them be together. It seemed like the right thing to do. I was just this gay jerk standing in the way of two people who might fall in love and have a real go of things. Draco was never going to let me into his life fully. He'd made that quite clear. But I didn't know how to stop loving him.

"You know what? I've had enough of this party," I announced not having anything to really say to Draco's declaration. And I wasn't really ready to give him up, but I felt like I should.

"I'll come with you, Harry," Hermione said, taking my hand.

"You don't have to. I kind of just want to be alone for a while. You stay and have fun okay? I mean it. Have fun. Forget me. And do what you want to do, Hermione. Even if I won't like it," I said giving her a kiss on the cheek and touching her face gently.

"Harry stop being so noble. I don't want to hurt you. I'd never hurt you on purpose," she said seriously.

"I know. But I'm not going to be hurt. Just enjoy yourself. Enjoy Draco. I mean it," I said stoically and then I just apparated away before either one of them could say another word or stop me.

But the truth was, I didn't really mean anything I just said. I _wanted_ to mean it. I wanted to give Hermione to Draco if it meant they'd both be happy. But I could help my own feelings. Or wondering if I fit in anywhere with the two of them. I think it just wasn't meant to be. Just like how Hermione loved me as more than a friend, but I just couldn't be with her the way she wanted me to be. I think that's how Draco felt. He couldn't give me what I really wanted and deserved. So in that light, it was kinder to let them go and let them be together because at least they had a shot at happiness. With Draco, unless he changed his attitude immensely, we'd never be together for real. I'd always be the secret he hid. And I wanted more than that. I deserved more than that. And I was going to hold out for more than that. Even if it killed me.

 **To be continued….Please leave some feedback for this story! I'm hoping you all are enjoying this twisted love story.**


	8. Chapter 8

**Disclaimer:** I own none of the characters here. JK Rowling and company own them. I merely play with them for my own amusement. Please don't sue. I have nothing of value anyway.

 **Summary:** Harry is caught in a love triangle to rival all else. He's found himself questioning his sexuality and is owning up to his attraction to Draco Malfoy. Meanwhile Draco is cozying up to Hermione, who won't give him the time of day. And Hermione keeps thinking there's hope for her and Harry to have a future together. It's a tangled web of emotions and will anyone get what they want? Set a couple of years after Hogwarts ended. Told from Harry's POV. Drarry, with undertones of Dramione.

 **Three is a Crowd**

Once I apparated away, I didn't know where to go. I went back home at first, but I didn't want to stay there alone. It seemed pathetic. So I decided to apparate to the gay bar Draco introduced me to. I figured if he and Hermione were going to have a fun evening together, maybe I should be in my own atmosphere where _I_ belonged. It was good this time to go and not feel like such an outsider the way I did tonight. Of course I didn't actually know anyone at this gay bar. But at least I could call them my people. So I walked inside and a lot of people were dressed up in costumes there too, to celebrate Halloween. There was a sign that offered 'Spooktacular' drink specials and I decided to order a whiskey sour they featured just to be a little different. It came with a cherry in it and seemed like something a gay man might drink. Which of course, two men next to me ordered whiskey neat and another ordered a tequila shot, so there really was no stereotyping drinks. But let's just say it made me feel like I was waving a rainbow flag with my little cherry bobbing along in my drink. And it didn't take all that long before a guy dressed as a cowboy sat next to me. He was cute, granted. But he was no Draco Malfoy. But he said his name was Rob and he offered to buy me another drink, but I'd barely finished the one I had. So I downed it quickly and slammed it on the bar and let him order me a new one. Why not? Only I didn't really fancy him. I noticed as he talked that he had a missing tooth and it turned me straight off. I excused myself and thanked him for the drink and then I disappeared into the crowd.

I hoped he would take the hint, and he seemed to. He didn't follow me. But another guy sidled up to me and asked me to dance. I held up my hands at first in protest to say no, but he was dressed as a fireman and even cuter than the Rob guy. I figured I might as well dance since I was there. So we went to the floor and he said his name was Chad. He asked me what I was dressed as and I told him I was a Quidditch star without thinking and he looked very confused. I had to tell him it was a pretend sport I just made up for the costume, and he seemed happy with that. Sometimes I forget to hold my tongue around Muggles. Chad said he always wanted to be a firefighter except he was really a tax accountant. That was more boring that my fake Muggle job of insurance sales. But we got along okay. We danced innocently at first and then Chad started grinding on me and telling me how cute I was. Honestly it was hot, but I kept thinking of Draco. And Draco he was not. I wanted to know what the hell Draco and Hermione were doing right now and if it was as lust filled as this dance I was having with Chad. But I tried to get them out of my memory and just concentrate on the hot guy I was with, who had all his teeth. But the song ended and he said he was going to the loo, and I just decided to leave. I know I probably could have had him easily, but I couldn't do it. My maiden voyage at sucking dick happened only hours before and I couldn't fathom doing it again with some random in a bar. Not that I didn't _want_ to do it again. I _did_. Just with Draco and not Chad. So I slipped out the back into the alley and went home.

I noted when I got there that the place was still dark and I'd only been at the bar for an hour or so. Obviously Hermione didn't rush right home after me, so that meant she stayed at the party and did what I told her to do. And that was to have fun with Draco. I moped my way upstairs and took off my Quidditch robes and put my pajama bottoms on and a t-shirt. I crawled into bed and turned on my telly. I flipped through the channels until I found a good horror movie to watch and I sat up in bed and watched as people got hacked to death with a machete. It kind of felt like my heart right now, so it seemed apropos. But after about fifteen minutes of good slasher action I heard the unmistakable sound of someone apparating into the downstairs living room. It was too loud to be outside. So I figured it was Hermione, which made me glad. At least she bothered to come home. But after another moment or so I heard voices on the stairs and I realized she wasn't alone. My door was open and I got up to shut it, but I wanted to peek out and see if she was with Draco. Who else would she be with? Was she taking him to her bed? Ugh. Just fucking kill me now. But when I peeked my head out, I saw Draco and Hermione standing on the landing coming towards my room. I couldn't fathom why they'd be doing that, but they started running and almost tripped and fell as they both tackled me into a hug.

"What the hell are you doing?" I asked, being squished by both of them.

"Harry, you're here!" Hermione cried as she kissed my cheek.

"Of course I'm here. Is that so strange?"

"We came here straight off and you weren't here. We didn't know where you'd run off to. Hermione here was worried for you," Draco said as he let me go and stood there somewhat awkwardly at the display of affection they'd both given me.

"Oh. I went someplace else. But now I'm here. Why are you two here? I told you to have fun!" I chided them, even if I was rather grateful that they came after me after all. I didn't think they would. Or rather, I didn't think Draco would.

"I was so worried we'd pissed you off. You seemed so sad. I didn't want you to leave like that," Hermione said with her words slightly slurred. She'd drank a lot more than I remembered or noticed. And I was surprised Draco hadn't taken advantage of that.

"I said it was fine to let you go, but she wasn't having any of that. Wouldn't even let me stay and drink more!" Draco said giving her a playful glare.

"Oh stop, you were concerned too. You said you'd gone too far. You felt like a shithead," Hermione told him, which pleased me.

"Hermione, that's one of those things I told you in secret. Not to be shared with Harry," he sighed.

"He deserves to know you care. He actually did care a little," Hermione drunkenly told me.

"Well I'm fine you guys. No worries. I was just watching a horror flick on the telly," I said trying to put them at ease.

"Oh yay! Can I watch with you?" Hermione asked excitedly, jumping up and down.

"Oi, she's had a lot to drink, Potter. You deal with her," Draco said as Hermione looked around at both of us with glassy eyes.

"You can watch the movie with me, but only if you get undressed from your costume. Can you do that?" I asked her gently.

She nodded and smiled at me.

"I'll be right back!"

"You need any help with that zipper or anything else on your person?" Draco called after her.

"Nope! Go away Draco!"

"See? That's why I said you could deal with her. Birds are supposed to get all sexy and freaky when they're drunk. But Hermione just laughs too much at nothing. And she stole an entire bowl of candy from Blaise's party! Who does that? Did she grow up poor?" Draco asked with annoyance.

"No she didn't grow up poor! And if she did, so what? She likes chocolates. She gave all our candy away," I said with a sigh.

"I didn't mean to make you miss the party," Draco said finally in a small voice. "I'm sorry I pissed you off."

"I'm sorry I got in the way of you and Hermione," I admitted in just as small a voice.

"You didn't. Not really. I mean, it's my bloody fault. I keep after both of you. Actually _you_ keep after me and I let you. I'm the one chasing _her_. And it's all just a big fucking mess. I don't know what to say or do," he held up his hands in defeat.

"I don't either. Maybe if none of us can decide, maybe we really should just be friends. Like for real. Not friends who suck each other's dicks and make out. But real friends."

"We could try. But I kinda like the part where you suck my dick and I get to make out with Hermione after. It's like a dream come true," he grinned at me.

"Fuck you. I'm being serious here! We can't keep doing it like that," I said adamantly.

"Alright, alright. I know. We can try to be friends. It's not going to be easy for any of us though. Trust me."

Just then, Hermione came out of her room dressed in her pajamas that had little owls all over them and they were bright pink. Draco took one look at her and couldn't help but laugh. But it was an affectionate sort of laugh. He held her face in his hands and grinned at her.

"My God, you're adorable," he told her sincerely. Then off my coughing fit, he looked at me then sighed. "But Harry thinks I'm not supposed to say shit like that anymore. So never mind."

"I don't look adorable?" she asked with a pouty lip.

Draco looked at me and implored me with his eyes. I just sighed and shrugged and he happily looked back at her.

"You're the most adorable woman in the world. Look at you in your fuzzy pink owl pajamas? Irresistible," he leaned down and kissed her cheeks. "Sorry Potter, it had to be done," he said to me afterwards.

"I give up," I muttered and grabbed Hermione's hand to lead her to my room to watch movies and Draco followed behind.

"Um, where are you going?" I asked him curiously, not remembering having invited him.

"I don't get to stay and watch horror movies with you guys?" he asked, genuinely hurt and put out by the snub.

"I didn't think you'd wanna stay. Hermione's drunk and I'm not sucking your dick during it. I figured you'd be bored."

"Pfft. I'll decide when I'm bored. And I'd like to hop in that big bed of yours and watch people get murdered," he said breezing past me and taking off his cape and shoes and throwing his suit jacket on my chair. Then he jumped right in the middle of the bed and held out his arms.

"I'm in the middle!" he exclaimed and I just rolled my eyes. This man would in fact be the death of me.

But Hermione happily climbed in the bed and I climbed in after her and Draco draped his arms around both of us.

"Now this is the life," he said smugly.

"You imagine yourself as some sort of quasi gay Hugh Hefner don't you? Like we're your playmates just huddled around you," I noted with a scathing glare in his direction, but it should have been directed at myself because I was the one snuggling under his arm along with Hermione. We were both letting him act out this fantasy, so it was our fault. But he was loving it.

"I am rather like Hugh Hefner, minus all the Viagra he needs. But I can keep more than one bird, or bloke, happy. That's why monogamy doesn't suit me. Why tie yourself down to one person when you can have more?" he asked.

"You're a pig," I informed him.

"Yeah, you're a pig," Hermione backed me up. But then she started giggling and reaching into her bag she'd brought that was filled with candy. "I'm kind of a pig too because I'm totally going to eat all this chocolate myself," she said to no one in particular. I don't even think she was paying attention to what Draco said.

"How much did she drink after I left? She wasn't this far gone before," I asked Draco curiously.

"Well we did leave almost straight off. But when we couldn't find you, we went back to the party and she had some Jagerbombs. I begged her not to, but then again I thought I might get lucky, so I let her go. She was so mad at herself for supposedly hurting your feelings, that she wanted to drown her sorrows. But I stopped her after three of those and made her come home," He explained.

"I see. And I bet you were kinda pissed I was here, weren't you?"

"No, you ninny. I was glad. Did you not enjoy the group hug experience we gave you?" he asked giving me a look.

"Well I rather thought I messed up your plans to get Hermione in the sack, since she might be drunk enough," I explained.

"Nah, I have a limit. A girl can be drunk, but she can't be stupid drunk. Hermione is stupid drunk. She'd probably hate herself or kill me tomorrow or both. I want the girl to know what the fuck she's doing when she's fucking me."

"How very noble of you," I mocked him with a smirk.

"Fuck you. At least I have some standards. Not all men can say the same," he scoffed.

"True. I do have to say I'm surprised you wouldn't take advantage of her."

"Never. I use things _to_ my advantage sometimes, but I never _take_ advantage. There's a difference. Get her drunk enough to kiss me, and that's okay. But get her so drunk she doesn't know her own name, then I leave her alone. I'm not a rapist."

"I never said you were!"

"I know but you fucking implied I might be!"

"No I didn't!"

"Yes, you kind of did."

"Well sorry. I didn't mean to."

"Can you both shut the fuck up? I'm trying to watch the movie!" Hermione interjected, not even listening to what we were saying or that I was defending her honor. She was just very focused on her chocolates and the movie. It was kind of cute. Even if I'm gay I can notice that. No wonder Draco couldn't resist her.

"What movie is this anyway?" Draco asked, leaning over closer to my ear.

"It's Friday the Thirteenth part five hundred or something. I don't know which one."

"I was never that much for slasher flicks. I enjoy a good suspense thriller though. The kind that really fucks with your mind," Draco told me quietly, so as not to interrupt Hermione's viewing pleasure.

"Me too. I like those the best," I agreed. "But on Halloween, I'll watch a slasher film just for fun."

"We never celebrated Halloween when I was a kid. My parents said it made fun of witches like we had warts and big noses. But now that I'm an adult it's just fun to dress up in costumes and drink a lot."

"I never celebrated Halloween either. My cousin Dudley got to trick or treat and I had to stay at home and hand out candy. But I wasn't even allowed to eat any except one piece of it. I used to horde it in my cupboard and pray my aunt and uncle never found my stash," I laughed slightly.

"That sucks, Potter."

"Yeah, it did. But oh well. Now I can eat as much candy as I want to," I announced as I grabbed Hermione's candy bag and took it for myself.

"Hey! That's mine!" she protested.

"Sharing is caring, my dear. Plus you can't eat all this. You'll puke. And you're not puking in my bed!" I warned her.

"Oh alright. Have some. I stole the whole bowl! Did Draco tell you that? _The entire bowl_!" she giggled her little head off and I couldn't help but join in.

"I know. I heard what a sneaky thief you were. Naughty Hermione!"

"Yes, naughty, naughty Hermione. I should spank you," Draco said giving her a sexy look.

"Stop it you dork! You're not spanking me." She shoved him playfully away from her.

"She must still have some of her wits left."

I laughed at the two of them playing. And it didn't bother me. They could joke and I was fine. It was the thought of them actually wanting to be _together_ that got to me. But either way it turned out, they were both with _me_ now. And they had not run off into the sunset together. And I had to be thankful for that. Even if I still didn't really know where I stood.

"Oh! Oh! This is the best part! This girl is going to get her head chopped off, and it's only because she's naked. Rule number one of horror movies—if you're a girl, don't get naked! And don't be a cheerleader. Or a naked cheerleader. Or else you'll die," Hermione told us both.

"This is the _best_ part? The naked bint gets her head chopped off and you call that the _best_ part? You're one warped little chickadee," Draco laughed shoving her away from him playfully.

"I just meant it's scary! Not that I _like_ seeing it. God, you don't get me, Draco," she lamented.

"No, I really don't. But that's okay. I love you anyways," he smiled at her.

"You don't love me. You wanna jump my bones, but you don't love me," she said seriously, suddenly not seeming as drunk.

"You got me there, love. I don't know what I feel. But you're pretty fucking special. You have a piece of my heart," he said holding his hand over his chest.

"And what about me huh?" I chimed in, feeling ill watching the two of them together.

"You have a piece too, Potter. But that's all I have to give. Pieces. It's not good enough for either one of you really," he said solemnly for once and then just looked back at the telly and didn't say anything more.

I thought of trying to make him talk more, but it seemed like he'd said enough. He felt like he didn't have a whole heart to offer anyone. Not even Hermione. Which meant I wasn't standing in the way of their love. But it also meant he could never love me either. Why was he so fucking broken and confused? I didn't know why, but I wanted to fix him. And when I looked at Hermione I could see her wheels turning and she snuggled down under his arm and closed her eyes and I was seeing that she probably wished she could fix him too. But neither of us probably could. So I just laid my head down on my pillow and tried to keep my distance. Draco's arm was still draped across the back of my pillow, but he wasn't touching me. But he did put his arm around Hermione and she did not stop him. Probably because she fell asleep. She was out cold. And it was just Draco and I lying there together with her tucked safely under his arm and I had no idea what to say to him. Nothing seemed appropriate. But if ever there was someone I wanted to save, it was him.

In the morning when I woke up, it was an interesting sight to see. We were a tangle of arms and legs and bodies pressed up against each other. Hermione and I both had our heads resting on Draco's chest and there was a bag of candy on his stomach. His arm was still locked around Hermione and the other arm was draped over the top of my head. I wiggled my way out from under his hand on my face and he didn't wake up. He just rolled over, smooshing the candy bag between him and Hermione and he wrapped his other arm around her. It was a peaceful scene, I had to say. Even if I was jealous. But I was the one who got up and out of the bed. If Hermione got up, then maybe it'd be me all cuddled up with him? But it wasn't. So I just decided to get something to eat and let them sleep longer. I knew they'd both had more to drink than I did. Especially Hermione. So I disappeared out of the bedroom and just left them alone. I figured it was safe. And I got a bowl of cereal to eat in the kitchen. It had been a strange night, that's for sure. But I suppose if we were going to try and really just be friends with Draco, things would simple up a lot. That was my hope anyway. But I still wanted him more. I wanted him more than ever because I did want to fix what was broken inside him that made him the way he was.

After a while of eating and drinking some coffee I'd made, I heard rustling upstairs. I knew it might have been Hermione's cat, but it sounded more like someone moving about the bedroom, so I figured I'd go upstairs and check on the coma twins. I'd left the door cracked when I walked out and when I approached I could hear muffled voices talking on the other side of the door. I stopped and eavesdropped because I was dying to know what Draco and Hermione talked about when I wasn't around.

"Did we actually, you know?" I heard Hermione ask Draco.

He laughed.

"In Harry's bed with him in it? I don't think so, love."

"Good. Oh god, my head hurts. You didn't tell him about the other thing did you? Or did I? I didn't did I?" she asked somewhat frantically and I wondered what the hell 'the other thing' was. But I had no idea. I hoped Draco would clue me in.

"I didn't tell him the other thing. I promised I wouldn't. And you kept your lips zipped. Which I thought for sure you'd told him the whole thing when you two lot were playing with me," he chuckled.

"No. He doesn't need to know what a terrible friend I am. I hate myself for it. God, and I hate you," she muttered. This was getting interesting. Did they shag before and not tell me? That's what it sounded like to me. And I seethed with anger as I listened intently.

"Why do you hate me? You seemed to like me okay when I was—"

"Don't even say the words!"

"Not saying the words doesn't make it not true."

"I know but I can't face it. Harry will kill me. Utterly murder me. And I can't have that. That's why I felt so badly and drank those stupid drinks. The bombs or whatever they were called? I wanted to die."

"Oh come on. It's not that bad. And if you want to die, then just tell Harry and let him murder you," he told her and I could already see the smirk on his face, even if I was just listening in.

I think at this point she hit him with the pillow because I heard a thumping sound and Draco saying ow. And for her to stop. But I couldn't get a visual. I thought about just bursting in there and asking why I'd murder her, but I was kind of afraid to know. And it seemed like Hermione was better at keeping secrets from me than I was at keeping them from her. I told that girl everything. And now she had some huge piece of the puzzle she was keeping secret. How could she do this to me?

"We should probably get up," I then heard Hermione say behind the door.

"Or we could stay and snuggle." Barf. Double barf. I didn't want to hear that.

But apparently Hermione must have agreed to the snuggling because the next thing I heard was muffled moans. That's when I decided it had to end. I opened the door and walked in just in time to watch the two of them kissing each other while Hermione lay on top of Draco. They weren't really counting on an audience but I cleared my voice loudly and they jumped apart.

"Harry! What are you doing in here?" Hermione asked as she scrambled to get herself off of Draco.

"It's my room, remember. And my bed. And I'd sort of appreciate it if you wouldn't make out with my boyfriend while you're in it," I shot back at her snidely.

"Your boyfriend?" she asked sadly.

"Your _boyfriend_? Are you mad?" Draco interjected. "I'm not your bloody boyfriend. I told you a thousand times, I'm your _friend_!"

"You weren't acting like my friend when I had your dick in my mouth last night!" I reminded him.

"Just shut up about that! That was a mistake."

"Yes, people make mistakes sometimes, Harry," Hermione interjected.

"And you? What exactly are you hiding from me? I overheard you! I know there's something I don't know!"

"No Harry. It's not like that." She held up her hands in protest.

"Yeah, it was really nothing," Draco chimed in.

"I'll be the judge of that," I told them both.

"I'm not telling you! It's something that happened before I knew all the facts. It's not happening again!" Hermione said shrilly.

I hated it when she got like that and my ears hated it too. Even Draco moved away from her. But I could tell she was panicked and that's how she reacts when she panics. I just sighed.

"Draco, then you tell me what happened," I looked at him.

"No way, mate. Hermione already wants me dead most of the time. No thanks," he held up his hands in defeat.

"Well I'm not leaving here until I know the truth. You guys fucked didn't you?" I asked pointedly.

"NO!" they both shouted in unison. Then Draco added, "We'll not _really_."

What the hell was that supposed to mean? And I asked them as much.

"It means she didn't touch me at all. And no important parts of mine touched hers. It was just like kissing," Draco said simply.

" _Like_ kissing? So it wasn't kissing?" I was getting confused.

"It was slightly more than that," Hermione admitted with her face hidden behind her hands.

"I went down on her," Draco blurted out the truth.

"You did _what_? _When_?" I cried in disbelief, as Draco got a smack across the arm from Hermione for spilling their dirty little secret.

"It happened when we went for lipstick! I just told you we'd kissed because I didn't know how to admit what we really did. I knew you'd be hurt. And when you told me what _you_ did to Draco, I just wanted to crawl into a hole even more."

"So you're saying that I went down on Draco and like ten minutes later he went down on you? Am I hearing this correctly?" I asked with utter confusion.

"Yes. Only I didn't know what happened until later or I wouldn't have let him!" Hermione cried.

"Alright. Okay. Fine. But why were you kissing him not five minutes ago in my bed?" I challenged her. If she was so damn guilty then why was she kissing him.

"I have no good answer for that except that Draco does something to me," she said in a small voice.

"I do have that charm," Draco smiled smugly and Hermione hit him with a pillow and I launched a slipper at his face. He was enjoying playing with both of our emotions way too much.

"You have zero charm working for you right now. Is this a game with you? I mean, honestly. Is it just a game?" I asked angrily wanting to know if we were all being played.

"It's not a game. I'm confused! You have no idea what it's like to fancy two completely different people. I mean one of them isn't even a girl. I don't know how to handle that! After I was with you Harry, I felt the need to manly myself up a little, so I sort of seduced Hermione's knickers off. It felt better. And I felt better. And I didn't really think about what it was going to do to you or your friendship with Hermione. I'm a jerk. Plain and simple. A confused really fucked up jerk with no heart. You were right to hate me all those years. I deserved it."

I thought on what he said for a moment and it seemed like Hermione was also thinking about what to say. She spoke before I did though. I couldn't seem to form words.

"Draco, what you did was deplorable. Not telling me what happened between you and Harry was terrible. But you're not an awful person with no heart. You just need to stop trying to prove you're something you're not," she told him.

"What do you mean, prove I'm something I'm not? Do you think I'm actually _gay_? Because I'm not. I like women! A lot, as it happens. I've never acted on an attraction to a man before Harry. And it's just a passing fancy. It's like extreme male bonding. It's not love. I'm not a fag," he protested angrily.

"Excuse me? _Fag_? Is that what you think I am? Because you didn't have a problem with this fag when your cock was in my mouth," I shot back at him just as angrily.

"That's not what I meant. I didn't mean it as an insult to you, but I'm still not one of them!"

"Stop it! Both of you! Draco, do not use that word again. And Harry, please just try and calm down a little," Hermione interjected.

"Oh stop acting like a mediator here. You're not innocent. You're supposed to be my best friend and even if you didn't know what Draco and I did together, you knew I fancied him. You said he was all mine! And you lied to me, Hermione. I don't know how to forgive you right now."

Tears pricked her eyes and ran down her cheeks and I instantly felt badly for making her cry. But in all fairness, she kind of had it coming. But the actuality of it was, Draco was pulling everyone's strings. Making everyone feel special. When it turns out, maybe neither one of us was special. But then it just brought me back to the broken man aspect of this. He _was_ broken. That's for certain. But did I want to repair him? Could he be repaired? I didn't know. Right now, I was too mad at both of them to really care. That was the honest truth. I was trying to be level headed and logical and a problem solver. But the truth was, I didn't care why anyone did anything. I just cared they did it. And behind my back. And therefore, I was pissed. So I just threw up my hands.

"I'm done here. You two can show yourselves out. I'm leaving." I said as I stormed out in my pajamas and didn't think it through.

But I remembered there were clothes in the laundry room so I went there to change. And then I just apparated to a coffee shop and sat there for a really long time pretending to read a paper when in fact I was trying to plan my life. God only knew what they did together when I was gone. And I realized I didn't want to know. I didn't want to know any of it. Knowing meant losing all hope for my own future. And I couldn't stand that. I wanted Draco to want me. But I didn't think he ever really would. It all went back to the same place. I was the dirty secret and Hermione was the one he wanted to take home. Except I wondered how welcoming his parents would be of her if he did take her home. She wasn't a pureblood. They hated her kind. But at least she was female. A lot better to bring her home than me, I suspect. I should just step back like I said I would and let them have their time together. It was clear they wanted it, no matter how much Hermione claimed to want to spare my feelings. She was still only human and Draco had some kind of superhuman magnetic pull that everyone was helpless against. I didn't know what it was, but I knew he had it. I just cursed the day I ever let that magnetic charm get to me. I wish I could go back in time to before I met up with him again. Life was simpler then. And right now, I just wanted simple.

 **To be continued….Please leave some feedback for this story! I'm hoping you all are enjoying this twisted love story.**


	9. Chapter 9

**Disclaimer:** I own none of the characters here. JK Rowling and company own them. I merely play with them for my own amusement. Please don't sue. I have nothing of value anyway.

 **Summary:** Harry is caught in a love triangle to rival all else. He's found himself questioning his sexuality and is owning up to his attraction to Draco Malfoy. Meanwhile Draco is cozying up to Hermione, who won't give him the time of day. And Hermione keeps thinking there's hope for her and Harry to have a future together. It's a tangled web of emotions and will anyone get what they want? Set a couple of years after Hogwarts ended. Told from Harry's POV. Drarry, with undertones of Dramione.

 **Three is a Crowd**

When I went back to the house, I found it seemingly empty. I didn't know if Draco and Hermione left someplace together, and this time I really didn't care. It was obvious they had something going on that I wasn't a part of, so I was just going to let them have at it. It was all I could do. But when I sat down in the living room, Hermione appeared carrying laundry under her arm.

"Harry! You're back!" she exclaimed when she saw me.

"Yep, I'm back. Where's your boyfriend?" I asked curiously.

"He's not my boyfriend. And I'm really sorry I lied to you, Harry. I won't do it again," she promised me.

"Well he's certainly not my boyfriend. He made that much clear. I don't know what he is, except a thorn in my side," I lamented.

Hermione sat down next to me on the couch. She touched my arm.

"He played both of us. He told me you didn't care what he did with me, and I believed him. He's very convincing."

"Yeah, he's convincing when he's got his head between your legs I guess," I said snidely.

"Harry! That was uncalled for. I'm on your side here. I just feel so badly about everything!" she said wiping tears out of her eyes.

"I'm sorry. I guess I'm not being fair. You're right that he played both of us. It's just aren't we smarter than that? I'm not an idiot and you're like brilliantly gifted and yet here we both are letting a man come between us. What's wrong with us?" I wondered with a sigh.

"I don't know how we got to this point. But I told him no more when he left here. I said I was done. And I meant that."

"Did you really? Or do you secretly still want him?" I wondered curiously.

"I don't! I mean, if you didn't fancy him, then I suppose there'd be nothing stopping me. But I don't want to be a bad friend," she explained.

"If you really want him, be my guest. I'm so over him," I said, but didn't really mean it.

"You don't really mean that," she said giving me a knowing look.

"Alright, so you read me like a book. I do want him. But what's the point? He's ashamed of his feelings for me. Whatever they may be. So I say we should just go back to being friends," I told her sadly.

"Harry, you're not friends with him now. I know we said we'd be friends, but that's just a lie. It's always been more, and if you can't have that, you're going to be upset."

"I just hate him so much. Why do I even want him?" I bemoaned.

"I hate him too. I don't know why he's so irresistible. It really gets under my skin how he does that. Worms his way into your heart," she said with frustration.

"And into your knickers," I reminded her.

"Ugh. Don't even say it. I'm so embarrassed."

"Don't be. At least you didn't suck his dick like I did."

"Oh Harry, I'm sorry. I know you thought that really meant something to him," she said, giving me a pat on the back.

"I did! But it turns out it just meant he likes having his dick sucked. Which isn't a huge shocker. So does every other man in the world," I sighed. "At least you got an orgasm out of it."

"Harry!"

"What? It's true!"

"Ugh. Just shoot me. I'm so sorry."

"Don't be. It's over. Let's just move on."

And that's what I thoroughly planned to do. Move on. I didn't want to see Draco anymore. He was nothing but trouble. And Hermione was right when she said we never really were friends. We weren't. I always wanted more. But I was questioning in my mind why that was. Sure, he was a good looking bloke. But so were lots of other people. What exactly was it about him that was making me lose my mind? I couldn't really put my finger on it, but I knew it had to end. Now. He was never going to be what I wanted him to be. I just couldn't believe my best friend lied to me about what happened. I wanted to forgive Hermione and just move on like I said. But some part of me was still angry at her for going behind my back and letting Draco pleasure her. She wasn't even drunk, so she couldn't use that excuse. And Draco? He didn't even offer an excuse other than to say he was a shithead basically. He wasn't lying there. That he was. But then why was my heart still set on figuring him out? He didn't want me to figure him out. And I don't really think he wanted anyone to try and figure him out. That's why he hid behind the guise of not being good at monogamy. Draco was just a confused person, and me and Hermione were his guinea pigs to try stuff out on. But I was done with him this time. And I hoped Hermione would be done with him too.

"Do you really think we can just move on from this?" she asked me quietly, breaking me out of my thoughts.

"I certainly want to try. What else can we do? Unless we're actually both going to date him. Is that something you want for us?" I asked curiously, knowing full well she'd say no. And she did. So then I proposed what else we could do?

"I have no idea Harry. I just don't want you to think I'm a horrible person. I knew you fancied him but I guess I just didn't realize how much it meant. Draco tried to tell me you were okay with him being with me. And I guess some part of me just wanted to believe that," she admitted to me finally.

"Why'd you want to believe it so badly unless you have feelings for him too?" I wondered.

"I might have some feelings for him, yes. But they don't trump yours! My feelings are more lusty than love. You said you loved him. I-I can't compete with that."

"I don't know if I can love him knowing he'll never love me. So if you really want him, then go be with him. I won't stand in the way. I mean it. I've seen the way he looks at you. Like last night when he said you were adorable. He'd never look at me that way. I think maybe he loves you, Hermione," I told her seriously, trying to puzzle it all out.

"But even if he did, which I'm not saying he does, I won't ruin our friendship over a man. I just won't. I'll find someone else. I think we should just say good riddance to Draco. No being friends or anything with him. It only leads to badness," she told me. "I think that's the only workable plan is to sever all ties. No friendship, no nothing."

"You're right. I know you are. But why does it feel so bad inside?" I asked sadly.

Hermione scooted close to me. She put her arm around me.

"I wish I had the answers as to why this feels so bad for both of us. It's all Draco's fault! He led us both on. He's a colossal fuckwit. We knew that about him when all this started, why on earth did we think he'd changed?" she asked herself just as much as she asked me.

I looked over at her.

"He had changed though. Somewhat. I mean, he's still a terrible person, but I don't think he really wants to be. I think he's just messed up. His family messed him up. Because let's be honest here, it's not just me he can't take home to Daddy. It's you too. You're a mudblood, Hermione. Excuse my language, but you know that's what the Malfoy's think of you. He can't be with either one of us and still have his family's approval. Yet he's drawn to both of us. That must mean he actually cares for us, right?" I tried to rationalize everything so it wouldn't hurt so much.

"I know he can't take me home to Daddy, but I'd wager he could do it a lot more than he could bringing you home. What if he really is gay? I'm already in love with one gay bloke, if I go for another, they'll have to commit me to an asylum or something," she joked half-heartedly.

"So then we're back to severing all ties then?" I asked.

She nodded.

"It's really the only way."

And I knew she was right. I kept telling myself all morning that this would be the only scenario that made sense. But I hated giving up hope. I at least felt like I wanted Draco in my life, I just wasn't sure why. That was the puzzle. He made me so mad, why would I want to be his friend at all? It made no sense. So I was just going to go with my gut and Hermione's plan, and just say no to him. Stay away from him. It was the only way I might keep a shred of my sanity.

Life went on after this and at work, Draco tried to come up to us in the cafeteria, but we snubbed him. He didn't take too kindly to that, but he also wasn't going to make a scene at work. Poor Hermione had it harder because she actually worked with him. And when she got the promotion they'd both been after, Draco apparently came to her with his hat in hand and congratulated her. She admitted it was a bit touch and go, but she managed to just thank him for his acknowledgment and not fall into his arms like he was hoping. And for me, he corned me in the men's room once and I told him it was a terrible place for him to come begging me to be his friend. We were at the toilets. And even he realized it was a bit much and asked me to please just talk to him after we were done. But I refused and quickly disappeared back into my office. So for three whole weeks, Operation Avoid Draco was in full swing. But it came to a screeching halt when I got hurt at work. It was my first time going out as the main lead Auror on a mission and I had a younger partner, fresh out of school. They felt like I was finally ready to do this thing, and I was eager to prove my worth. But since this is my life, nothing ever goes right and I ended up taking a blasting curse to the shoulder. Now I wasn't hurt that badly. A wizard can sustain a lot and be fixed up pretty easily. But it was enough that I was out of commission and my young charge had to save the day. He's gonna be good at this, by the way. But that's neither here nor there. I was out, and needed saving. And it was all over the entire Ministry when I got back with my arm in a sling that I had fucked up my maiden mission.

Needless to say I was feeling foolish and not up to the high standards they set for me. How could I screw up the first time they let me out on my own? I was just so distracted by the entire Draco ordeal that I admit I wasn't on my game like I should have been. So I got a busted up shoulder and ended up at St. Mungo's. Hermione was fretting over me like I'd nearly lost an arm, and I had to tell her I was gonna be alright. It was just a scratch. Barely enough to even warrant medical attention. But soon Draco learned what happened too and he stood outside the door at St. Mungo's and begged to be let in. We had said no, but when Hermione went to go get some things from home, Draco slipped into my room unannounced.

"Potter," he had said to me.

"Malfoy. What are you doing here?" I asked, wincing with pain.

He had flowers in his hand and also a bottle of whiskey. I looked at that and he noticed me looking and thrust the bottle of whiskey at me, while setting the flowers down on a table.

"I brought you these. I just wanted to see how you were doing," he told me somewhat awkwardly.

"You didn't have to. I'm fine. And flowers? Really?" I asked giving him a look.

"The flowers were for Hermione. If she comes back. But the whiskey is for you. Unless you want the flowers, then they're for you," he rambled.

I couldn't help but laugh slightly at his totally awkward behavior. It wasn't like Draco at all. He was actually being humble and nice and thoughtful. It was weird.

"I don't need the flowers, but Hermione might just throw them back in your face when she gets back," I informed him.

"Look, I know I was a total fuckwit. I played with everyone's emotions. But I've been trying to tell you two that I'm willing to change. I'm willing to just be friends with you two. Real friends. Not just me saying that to get what I want eventually."

"We considered being your friend already and we decided against it. You can't be trusted. And frankly, I don't trust myself around you and your weird signals," I admitted.

"I promise there won't be any more weird signals. I just want to be friends. I've missed you two. And you know I must mean that or I'd never debase myself like this. I'm practically begging for another chance," he said miserably.

"Don't you have other friends?" I wondered idly, not willing to give in so quickly.

"Of course I do. But like I told you before, they're my father's spies. I don't trust them," he explained.

"But you can trust me? Or am I the only one stupid enough to let you play your head games on them?" I shot back.

"Stop. I said I was sorry. I meant that! And yes, I trust you. You're Harry Potter. Who doesn't trust you?" Draco told me.

"Uh, my partner probably doesn't trust me. After all, I almost got us killed today. And it's really your fault because you distracted me and made me off my game," I informed him.

"My fault? How is it my fault? I've been trying to make nice with you for weeks and you kept shooting me down. I rather thought you hated my guts and didn't think of me at all anymore," he said glumly.

"Bollocks. I wish that were true. But you're under my skin, Draco. And I-I don't know if I can be just your friend anymore," It pained me to admit this to him, but it was the truth.

"Can we at least try?" he offered me pushing the bottle of whiskey towards me on the table.

Before I could answer, Hermione came back and had an overnight bag for me because they weren't letting me go home until the next morning. I needed a few items. She was startled to see Draco standing in my room and she knew I was probably too weak and helpless to make any credible threats against him. But she wasn't. She dropped the bag and pulled out her wand and shoved Draco back against the wall with her wand at his throat.

"Hermione stop!" I shouted at her.

"No, what is this wanker doing in your room? I'll call security," she hissed at him, never lowering her wand.

He held his hands up.

"Hey now! Put that thing away! I'm just visiting a sick friend. I wanted to make nice again. I've changed. I promise I won't lure anyone into my bed. I just want to be friends!" he pleaded his case.

She lowered the wand and looked at me disapprovingly, because I think she could tell I was about to cave in.

"Harry, what did we talk about?" she reminded me.

"I know! But he brought whiskey and flowers for you. Or me if you didn't want them. But the point is, he's trying. And maybe we should give him a chance?" I said quickly before I could talk myself out of it.

"Don't tell me you didn't miss me at least a little bit," Draco offered Hermione as she put her wand away and sighed.

"I didn't think much of you at all, honestly. I tried to put the past behind me," she told him with much aloofness.

"I want to put the past behind us too. Start fresh. Just the three of us as friends. It'll be great. No more confusing kissing or other things that friends don't do," he promised.

"He seems sincere," I offered, trying to get Hermione to see the light because the truth was, I was tired of dodging Draco and pretending I didn't still care. I did still care. As much as I hated to admit it. But this just made me unable to deny that I still had feelings for him.

"He always seems sincere but he never really is. You know that, Harry," Hermione scolded me like I was some child.

"It's my life though. And maybe you don't have to be his friend, but I want to be," I announced, totally unsure of myself, but trying to act like I knew what I was doing.

Draco smiled at this and looked to Hermione to see if she'd agree too.

"I don't want to be your friend Draco. But if Harry chooses this, then I'm not gonna stop him. He's a big boy. But I'm off limits, got it? You two can do boy things together, but I'm not going to be a part of it," she said adamantly.

"Alright. I get the message," Draco told her. "But promise not to threaten me with your wand every time I show up."

"I won't. But if you hurt Harry again, I won't keep that promise. I mean it, Draco. I'm done with you playing games."

"No more games. Just friendship. Promise. And if you change your mind, I'll be around. I promise not to try and get you in bed again."

I just sat and watched them hash out an arrangement that would work. And it seemed like Hermione thought I was nuts, but since I'd just been injured she didn't have the heart to pummel me with a pillow or something like she normally would have done when she felt I was making a foolish mistake. She just kept giving me disapproving glances and she sighed a lot. And then she said she was going to go home unless I needed her.

"No, I'll be fine. I'll be home in the morning," I assured her.

"Yes, well, I'll be at work then, so do you want me to take the day off to come care for you?" Hermione asked me kindly.

"No, no worries. I'll take care of myself."

"But they said you might need help because that arm needs to stay immobilized for a few days," she reminded me.

"I'll take care of him," Draco piped up. "You got your fancy new promotion to work on and I'm just a lowly worker bee. I'll take the time off to help Harry okay? It'll save you the trouble," Draco offered.

"I don't think that's such a good idea," Hermione shook her head.

"Why not Hermione? If he's just my friend, it's okay right? No need for you to miss work if you don't have to. I'll be fine with Draco," I told her assuredly.

She just thought on it for a moment and looked at both of us. Then she sighed and grabbed the flowers off the table and smelled them. She looked at Draco.

"These are nice. Thank you," she told him. Then she chucked them in the bin before turning back to me. "Don't let him play you, Harry. I'll be home at 5:30 promptly tomorrow. If I find you in a worse state than this, someone is going to see my wrath," she said to me, but glanced over her shoulder at Draco, who just stood there not saying a word.

Then she kissed my cheek and left me alone with Draco. I looked at the flowers in the bin and I realized she meant business. She really wanted nothing to do with him. But that was okay with me honestly. I kinda sorta wanted Draco to myself anyway. And I know we said we were just friends and no more funny business, but if something did happen, I felt much more secure in knowing that Hermione wasn't going to be a factor in our relationship any longer. Then I started to wonder if that's why she did what she did. Because I knew for a fact she was taking it just as hard as me not seeing Draco anymore. She wouldn't admit her feelings, but I could tell there were feelings there. But now she was stepping aside for my sake. She really didn't have to do that, but I was grateful she did. Finally Draco spoke again.

"So, Hermione is scary as shit," he laughed slightly. "I lived on her bad side for years, but man, she's really something when she's mad."

"Yeah, you don't want to see her mad at you. Trust me," I laughed along with him.

"She chucked my flowers in a bin. Those cost a fortune," he said as he fished them out and put them back on the table for me to enjoy since she didn't want them. And I wasn't going to chuck them in a bin. I was too nice for that. But it was noted that I was getting recycled flowers meant for someone else. But who cared right? It was the gesture that counted.

"So are you really going to look after me tomorrow? I could just take care of myself," I informed him, trying to let him off the hook.

"No, you can't care for yourself with only one good arm. I'll help you. It's not a hardship. I could honestly use a few days off from work anyway," he said, waving his hand in the air dismissing my idea of going it alone.

"I appreciate it."

"No worries. I have a lot to atone for. I know that. So this will be my first step," he smiled at me.

"Why don't you sit down for a spell? I could use the company now that Hermione left and won't come back as long as you're here," I said with a small grin.

Draco sat in a chair and looked at me. He reached over and took my good hand for a slight second and squeezed it, then let it fall again.

"You had me worried, Potter. I heard you'd been injured on the job and it was all anyone could talk about. I thought it was going to be a lot worse," he admitted to me.

"People like to gossip. I just feel like an idiot. This guy wasn't even so tough but he had a friend hiding in a closet and he took me by surprise. He blasted me with some sort of dark curse that ripped my shoulder to shreds. Luckily the healers fixed me up. It barely hurts now." I lied a little. It did in fact hurt quite a lot. But I wanted to seem tougher than I really was. Harry Potter never complained about injuries. It just wasn't my thing. Mostly because throughout my life, I wasn't used to having anyone care if I was hurt or not. And that stuck with me. I was stoic. I felt like I had to be. But Draco saw through it.

"I'd wager it hurts a bit more than you're letting on. I see the way you wince every time you move," he noted.

"Mostly it's my ego that's wounded. My first bloody outing alone without someone else being in charge and I fuck it up. Such is my life," I lamented with a shake of my head.

"You reckon they're gonna put you back on desk duty again for a while after this?" Draco wondered.

"Definitely. I mean, I'm hurt right now. And when I get better, they probably won't trust me. I have to start all over again."

"I'm really sorry if it was my fault. Like you said it was. I didn't mean to distract you to the point you'd get hurt," Draco said in a small sincere voice.

"It's okay. I'm honestly relived you want to be friends. Like real friends. I missed you too. And I know I was sort of the instigator of our romantic encounters, so I promise you I won't do that anymore. I know you don't feel that way for me, so I won't push it," I said quietly, not wanting to admit my own role in this mess we made.

"Let's just not talk about any of that now, okay? It's all water under the bridge. You wanna play some wizard chess? I see they've got a game board in the corner. I could set it up for us," Draco offered, getting up to go to a basket of games and such that resided in the corner of the room.

"Yeah sure. It'll pass the time at least. And it's a nice friendly thing we can do with our time," I smiled at him, hoping that we really could be friends and nothing more. I still had my wayward feelings and I suspected he did too, but I wasn't going to let that stop us. I needed Draco back in my life. I couldn't explain it, but it was true. I _needed_ him around. I felt empty when he wasn't there. I just hoped this would work out.

The next morning, the healers saw fit to release me into Draco's care. We went back to my house and I was feeling more pain that I wished I would have felt, but they gave me potions to take for the pain. Draco set them up on the kitchen counter and asked me if I wanted to take one. I was trying to be stoic again, but it really fucking hurt, so I caved in and said yes. I downed the potion and it immediately made the pain vanish, but it also made me feel loopy and out of my mind too. I told Draco this and he ushered me upstairs to my bedroom and was going to leave me there to rest, but I asked him to stay. I offered to have him watch the telly with me. He hesitated a moment, but then he climbed into the bed beside me but didn't touch me at all, and sat back against the pillows. We watched Buffy which was a show Draco had never seen before and he loved it. It was a marathon so they kept showing the shows and I was so out of my mind I don't really remember them. But I recalled seeing his face light up and sometimes he'd laugh a lot. He said some of it was very absurd and he couldn't help but laugh. But he said the Buffy chick reminded him of Hermione. That was less good in my mind because Buffy is very pretty. Even I know that and I'm gay. I told him I was partial to Spike, and that made him laugh harder because Spike is a bleached blonde vampire who looks a lot like Draco. But sue me. I have a type apparently. And I'm not afraid to admit it.

When Hermione got home promptly at 5:30 just as she said she would, she found Draco and I in bed together. But it was all very innocent and friend like. We were fully clothed and an acceptable distance away from each other. And I was still a little loopy so I asked her to come join us in the Buffy marathon. She sighed and started to protest, but I put on my best begging face and she relented. She told me to scoot over though so she wouldn't be next to Draco. And then she cuddled up to me as much as she could without hurting me. She loved this show too. But soon she was hungry and decided to make dinner for all of us. Even Draco. She said she didn't want to cook for him, but since he was there, it'd be rude to exclude him. And he offered to help her in the kitchen. She refused though. She told him to stay with me. He really was being a perfect gentlemen the entire day. But it was hard to have him in my bed with me and not want to cuddle up to him. He looked so sexy and handsome, it took all my willpower not to crawl under the covers and service him again. I knew only badness lied there and I wouldn't do it again. But oh, how I wanted to. Draco was tougher to read though. I couldn't tell if being in bed with me had any effect on him whatsoever. He was a blank slate. But before Hermione called us down to dinner, he did lean over and ruffle my hair.

"How are you feeling, Potter?" he asked with a smile.

"I feel pretty good actually. But that's probably the potions talking," I admitted.

"Today has been kind of nice though, don't you think? Have I proved to you that I can be your friend without any weird head games going on?" he asked hopefully.

"Draco, today has been good. But it's like your trial period. Of course you're gonna be good. I think I need more than a day to trust you again," I admitted realistically.

Part of me just wanted to tell him he was right and we could just be friends without any fuckery going on. But anyone could be good for a day. I'd need a lot more time before I could really trust he wasn't going to hurt me. And I needed more than one day, being looped out of my mind on potions, to know if I could be good and not make a fool of myself with him again. It went both ways. I didn't trust either one of us. Hermione I trusted more, but that's because she wasn't suggestible to Draco's friendship. She didn't seem to need him like I did. And that was a good thing. It meant that whatever feelings she had, she could get over. But I wasn't as confident I could. But I was going to try. Draco didn't really say anything to what I said. He just smiled and nestled down into the bed and propped his head on his bent elbow and watched the telly. I guess even he knew it took more than a day to gain trust back.

Before long, Hermione came up and told us supper was ready. She'd made spaghetti which was one of my favorites. But it wasn't a food suited to eating in bed, so we had to pull ourselves together and go downstairs to the dining room. She made certain that she sat at the head of the table and we were both down at the other end. I thought it was a little ridiculous but I think she was just proving a point that she wanted to be nowhere near Draco. He seemed to understand and didn't really try and talk to her much. She wasn't receptive when he did try. And truth be told, the tension at the table was something I was having a hard time eating through. I just wanted everyone to get along.

"This spaghetti is delicious," I remarked, trying to ease some of the tension.

"It really is. You're a good cook, Granger," Draco smiled at her.

"Thank you both. It's nothing special. Just my mum taught me how to make it," she said coolly.

"Well your mum makes delicious food then," Draco reiterated.

"I'd tell her that if I could. But I can't," Hermione said softly, creating even more tension at the table inadvertently. The subject of Hermione's folks was never a good idea to bring up. And Draco knew the story, but I guess he didn't think about it very hard before he spoke. But it seemed to dawn on him when she got ultra-quiet and morose looking.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to bring up your mum," Draco apologized.

"It's fine. I just don't like to be reminded that my family is gone, that's all."

"I didn't mean to remind you of that."

"But you did."

"It was an accident!"

"Stop! Draco didn't mean anything by it, Hermione," I interjected trying to keep peace.

"I know. I'm sorry. It's just weird for me to be having a civil conversation with the person we both claimed could eat shit and die. I just don't get why we're trying to be friends with him again," she said unhappily.

"Can I talk to you in the kitchen for a minute?" I asked her seriously, rising from the table.

She threw her fork down and got up and joined me in the kitchen. I looked her square in the eye and pleaded with her.

"Look, I know you still think he's scum, and maybe he is? But he's trying. And I need him in my life. I'm kind of glad you don't need him in yours, because I worried maybe you had feelings that ran deeper than you'd admit. But I need him. And I just want everyone to get along," I implored her.

"I certainly don't _need_ him in my life. And we were doing just fine before he came along, Harry. I don't understand why you need him at all. Aren't I enough for you? Couldn't you take back up with Ron again and have him be your friend? You've barely spoken to him at all in months," she said desperately.

"Ron wouldn't understand this new me. I'm afraid to tell him I'm gay. I-I don't know how he'd react. Nor do I know how he'd react if I told him Draco was my one and only conquest. You have to admit, he'd probably go ballistic."

"True. But you wouldn't have to hit him with everything all at once. I just wish you didn't feel like you _needed_ Draco. Why do you _need_ him?" she asked me plainly.

"Because I just do. I-I think I love him. I mean for real. Like as a person. Not just as a sex object in my fantasies. I want to fix him. He seems so broken and I just want to fix him, Hermione," I finally admitted the dark truth to her. I wanted to fix Draco Malfoy. Because I felt like if I did, he'd want me. And we'd be able to be a real couple. But Hermione wasn't having any of that.

"You can't fix someone who doesn't want to be fixed, Harry. He is who he is. And I don't think he wants fixing," she said, bursting my bubble.

"But that doesn't mean I can't try."

"It's your funeral."

"Stop being so dire. He's not going to actually kill me."

"He might. He'll rip your heart into tatters until it can't beat anymore."

"That's not gonna happen."

"Suit yourself. If it really means that much to you, I'll try and be his friend. But I'm only doing it for you. I still think this is a big mistake. But I'll give him a chance, okay?" she told me with a small sigh.

"Thank you, Hermione. You won't regret it. I have a good feeling about this all." Which was a lie. I did not have a good feeling about this. I kind of knew Hermione was right. But my stubborn streak and my heart refused to believe her.

We exited the kitchen and went back to the dining room where Draco was drinking wine and looking at his watch. I guess we were gone for a long time. But when we got back I was all smiles and Hermione tried to be more pleasant.

"I've decided that for Harry's sake, we can be friends. But I mean it Draco, if you so much as lay one unwanted hand on me, I will break all your bones and they'll have to put in traction for months," Hermione told him. Okay, so she wasn't that much more pleasant. But she was trying.

Draco held up his hands in defeat.

"I get it. I won't touch you unless it's a friendly touch. And I won't do anything to make you break all my bones. God, you're one scary bint, you know that?" Draco laughed slightly.

"I just don't like it when people hurt my friends. It upsets me. You already know not to mess with me. I taught you that lesson when we were thirteen. Remember?" she smiled a little.

"I fucking remember. That punch to the face was pretty unforgettable," Draco laughed.

"Don't make me have to do it again."

"I won't. I don't want on your bad side. I'd like to get back on the good side again if possible. You just have to give me a chance," he pleaded.

"I'll give you the chance. But you can be better friends with Harry than with me. He seems to want this more than I do. I'm just along for the ride," she said picking up her fork again and digging into her food.

Nothing more was really said after that. Draco seemed to get the message. And I did too. She was just doing this for me. Not for herself. Which made me feel better about my ideas. It wouldn't work as well if we both wanted to save Draco. I wanted to be the sole survivor in this triangle of shit we'd created. And I wasn't going to stop until I was the remaining victor. I knew I could fix him if only I had the chance. And now this was my chance. I wasn't going to blow it.

 **To be continued….Please leave some feedback for this story! I'm hoping you all are enjoying this twisted love story.**


	10. Chapter 10

**Disclaimer:** I own none of the characters here. JK Rowling and company own them. I merely play with them for my own amusement. Please don't sue. I have nothing of value anyway.

 **Summary:** Harry is caught in a love triangle to rival all else. He's found himself questioning his sexuality and is owning up to his attraction to Draco Malfoy. Meanwhile Draco is cozying up to Hermione, who won't give him the time of day. And Hermione keeps thinking there's hope for her and Harry to have a future together. It's a tangled web of emotions and will anyone get what they want? Set a couple of years after Hogwarts ended. Told from Harry's POV. Drarry, with undertones of Dramione.

 **Three is a Crowd**

Some time passed and Draco and I stuck to our friendship plan. Hermione didn't really like it much, but Draco had stopped bothering her for the most part and she was able to just ignore his presence most of the time. The only time they were friendly was when they were working. That was mostly because Hermione was his supervisor now and he had to be nice to her. But she could have made his life hell and for my sake she didn't. But she did hand him a project that required his presence at our house again. It was her pet project and out of all the other people in the department she gave the job to Draco. I wasn't sure if that was for my benefit or her own. Maybe she wanted to see him fail? Or maybe she liked him more than she let on? I really wasn't sure. But all I knew is that it meant he spent more time with us. And me specifically. Because whenever the working day ended, I was always there waiting for him to watch the telly or drink whiskey with him. Hermione didn't usually join us for these moments, and that was just fine by me. Draco stopped openly lusting after her too, which I found to be a pleasant surprise. But he was also very careful around me to not send me any mixed signals. That was the part I wanted to remedy because I rather missed the snuggling up and hair ruffling he used to do with me. But in fairness, he was just trying to adhere to our friendship agreement. And frankly, he'd proved to me that he could be a platonic friend without anything else going on. Except I still wanted something to be going on. And I still wanted to save him. That was proving rather difficult. But I was willing to bide my time.

Tonight it was a Friday night and he wanted to go to a bar and get shitfaced. He didn't want to sit around my flat, but rather wanted to go out this time. At first I wasn't even sure I was invited because he didn't specify I'd be coming with him. But he did ask Hermione if she wanted to come with us, so that meant he just automatically included me. That felt good. However Hermione said no. She wanted to relax with a book and bubble bath and some wine. She didn't have any desire to go to a bar. And neither did I really, but I went because Draco wanted to go. We apparated to the city because he said London had the best night life. And we went to this really jumping club called The Red Room. I had no idea how we'd get in though because the line was so long. But Draco dressed me up like him with a white shirt, open at the top, and a black silk suit. He actually purchased the entire outfit for me and said my usual clothes were never going to get me laid. So we were dressed like twins except his suit was navy blue, and this got us to the front of the line. Apparently we looked rich, and when Draco handed the bouncer a wad of Muggle cash, suddenly we were inside the sanctuary, while all the other people waited outside. I loved having a rich friend with style. I was pretty well off, honestly. But I had no style. Draco was teaching me how to be more like him. And I ate it up.

"So Potter, think you'll get lucky tonight?" he asked me as we headed towards the bar to order some drinks.

"Doubtful. What about you?" I wondered, hoping he wouldn't spend the whole night looking for a girl to bed.

"I don't know yet. The night is young. But I don't want you to feel left out. We need to find a fag hag or something," he laughed.

I didn't know what that meant but it sounded mean. I glared at him.

"Fag hag? What does that mean?" I asked crossly.

"Relax Potter. It's not an insult. It's just a name for a bird who hangs around lots of gay men. If I found one of those then I could have her and you could have a go at one her mates. It'd be perfect," he explained.

"I still don't like the term. It sounds derogatory," I shook my head.

"God, get a grip. It's just a saying. You really need a drink more than I do. I'm all stressed out from Hermione barking orders at me all day long. But you're wound awfully tight," he said with a sigh.

I decided to let it go. I suppose it would be a good thing to find a girl who had gay male friends. But I really just wanted to spent the evening with Draco. But I couldn't tell him that without endangering our agreement. We got our drinks and found a high top table to sit at. There were a lot of fine looking people in this club. Men and women. I could appreciate both. But no one looked as good as Draco did. He was sitting there sipping his drink with his messy mop of blonde hair in his eyes, and the polished navy suit. I could see his ankles as the trousers rode up and he wasn't wearing any socks. Did I ever tell you Draco has cute feet? My feet are hairy and gross, but his feet are smooth and it looks like he gets a pedicure, but when I asked him he said pedicures were for women. But I think he's lying. No one has feet that look that good without trying. This is how far gone I am. I'm drooling over his feet. And I don't even have a foot fetish! But I was staring at Draco's feet, while he was looking cool scanning the crowd. We weren't talking, so I tried to remedy that.

"So do you think you'll finish your work project soon?" I wondered sipping my own drink.

"I don't know. Hermione keeps adding layers to it. I might be done by Christmas at this rate. What about you? They letting you off desk duty soon?" he asked me curiously.

I nodded my head.

"My arm is all healed and they said I just made a rookie mistake. I didn't secure the building before I let my guard down. Live and learn. At least they didn't fire me."

"Nah, they'd never fire you. But I think making you ride a desk for a month is punishment enough."

"Yeah, it sucked. But I'm told that Monday morning I'll be back to active duty as an Auror. I can't wait. I wish you were an Auror too," I admitted.

"Me? An Auror? That's never gonna happen," he laughed.

"Why not? You'd be good at it."

"I'm not risking life and limb for a stupid job. Why do you think I'm in the Department of Magical Creatures? It's like the easiest job you could think of. I'm not much of a fighter, in case you don't remember my youth. I spent it hurling insults and running away when things got bad. I couldn't even kill one measly person and be done with it," he said with a sigh.

"Uh, it's kind of a good thing you didn't kill that 'measly' person. He was like the most powerful wizard of all time, aside from Voldemort himself. And I'd hate you a lot more if you actually did that," I informed him.

"No shit. You'd totally hate me. I'm not saying I wish I'd done it. In fact, quite the opposite. I just felt like it proved how not ready and willing I am to attack people, even if I feel like I have to. I'm a lover, not a fighter," he said brushing lint off my jacket.

"I wouldn't mind seeing you fight though. For the greater good. Not like last time when you were fighting on the wrong side. I bet you'd do a good job if you tried," I pointed out, brushing lint off his jacket now since that seemed to be the thing to do.

"Nope. Not gonna happen. I mean, if someone comes after me, I will fight back. But why go asking for trouble? My father said to stay the fuck out of trouble from now on. And I intend to uphold his wishes."

"Your father said that? I thought he hated your job at the Ministry," I shot back.

"He does. He thinks it's pointless. But he does not want me being an Auror. He said I was to stay out of any kind of fight and not to go looking for trouble. Our family name is already a mess, so he doesn't want me ruining it further by being careless. Plus he doesn't want me to get hurt."

"That's kind of pathetic that you'd listen to your Daddy about that. What about what you want to do?" I asked him pointedly.

"This _is_ what I want to do. Daddy has nothing to do with it. But keeping out of trouble suits both of us just fine. Why not heed his advice?" Draco shrugged.

"I rather thought you hated your father and didn't do anything he asked of you," I said with some surprise at how I underestimated Draco's familial ties.

"I don't hate the man. I do my own thing mostly. And in return for me staying out of the papers for bad things, he lets me have my money. It's a sweet arrangement."

"I thought your father wanted you to get married and do stuff like that. You also said he'd never understand about me. Back when we had something," I added softly.

"He does want me married off. And he'd never in a million years accept me with you. But I can't hate him for it. He's just doing what he knows. I'm trying to put him off as long as I can. But the older I get, the harder it's gonna be," Draco admitted with a sigh, as he signaled the waitress for another drink.

"I think it's awful to be told who to marry or who to be with. Don't you think it's awful? What would he really think of our friendship? Does he even know?" I wondered somewhat saddened for his life.

"It is awful to be told what to do. That's why I stay away as much as I can. But like I said he's got spies. And yes, he knows we're friends. I had to tell him. He thinks it's good for our name though. He just has no clue what we used to do. And it's gonna stay that way, Potter. You got it?" he said, leaning over to me somewhat menacingly.

That's not the way I was used to him talking to me these days. But he really, really didn't want our secret out. So I just nodded. What else could I do? He was ashamed of us. And that deflated me incredibly. But the night was still young. We'd barely had anything to drink. It was amazing what might seem like a good idea once you were shitfaced. But then I felt awful for trying to corrupt him into something he'd get disowned for. But I knew he had these longings for me before. I doubt they just poofed away. They couldn't. He was just not acting on them anymore, and I wasn't trying to come on to him. But it was getting harder and harder not to do that. I wanted him so bad. He was still the sexiest guy in the whole bar and I went back to obsessing over his perfect ankles while we sipped our drinks in silence again.

We had several more drinks and were well on our way to shitfaced town when Draco said he wanted to dance. I didn't think he meant with me, but he grabbed my arm and ushered me out to the dancefloor with him. He was a good dancer, and I was terrible at it. But I tried to emulate his movements and look as good as he did while doing them. I'm not sure I pulled it off. I could have just looked like a spastic having an episode. But Draco didn't laugh at me. In fact, he danced real close to me and gyrated around all sexy like. There were two women watching us dance and they seemed to get off on the whole two men dancing sexy together. I had no idea that was a turn on. I knew two women dancing sexy turned men on, but I had no idea it was the same for women. Or at least these women. They were giving us looks and smiles until they jumped onto the floor and started dancing with us. Not my ultimate fantasy to be smooshed between two unknown women at a club, but they did push Draco and I together more and I liked that. We were rubbing against each other and Draco had his arms around the one girl while I just kept my arms limply at my sides. I wasn't pulling this off, but I was trying really hard to. I didn't want Draco to dump me on the floor for the girl, so I kept trying to be included in the dance. Then all of a sudden someone's hands gripped my ass tightly. I thought it was Draco at first, but that was wishful thinking. It was the other girl. She wanted me to grind against her, so I just did it. I'm not proud. But I was really drunk. It didn't give me a boner though, but I already had one from dancing sexy with Draco, so I totally gave her the wrong impression. She felt it on her leg and assumed I wanted to fuck her. She verbalized this in my ear when she asked me to ditch my boyfriend for a quick shag in the loo with her. Ugh. No thanks. And I said as much.

I'd had enough of this dancing and I grabbed Draco's hand and pulled him away from the other girl and tried to get him to dance with me again. But he thought I was nuts.

"What are you doing?" he shouted in my ear over the din of the music.

"That bird asked me to fuck her in the loo. I had to get away from them," I explained loudly.

Draco just laughed and laughed and then he waved at the two girls and grabbed me up in his arms like we really were lovers. They seemed disappointed but they did walk away and leave us.

"Happy now?" Draco asked in my ear.

"Yes, very much so. I'd rather just dance with you anyway," I admitted knowing it might be against the rules, but I was drunk. I already said that before. But it's true. I was. And so was he because he kept dancing with me. He didn't even seem sore that he struck out with the one girl he was dancing with. But I decided to make sure he wasn't angry.

"Are you sure you're okay leaving the girls? I don't want to ruin your game," I shouted in his ear.

"No, don't worry. She's not my type. I can tell she's not very smart. I like smart girls," he shouted back.

"You planning to start a book club with her? I figured you were just gonna shag her and leave her," I laughed slightly at him.

"Nah, not tonight. I think I'd rather just hang with you. Just us guys. I'm not feeling this crowd," he admitted as he took my arm and led me off the dancefloor and back to our table.

We ordered up more drinks and I just kept staring at how beautiful Draco was, while he seemed very lost in thought. I wondered why he wasn't feeling the crowd? But I didn't want to ask him because I was afraid it would lead to me confessing my undying love for him. But I was feeling no pain and I kept leaning on Draco just so I wouldn't fall off the stool. He didn't seem to mind though. He just ruffled up my hair and told me I was getting way too drunk. I concurred and we decided to go back to my place. He was over the night club scene and I never wanted to be there in the first place. So we apparated to my flat and just fell on the couch together laughing from the wild sensation of apparition. You got used to it after so many years but when you were really drunk it was like a rollercoaster. I laid my head on Draco's shoulder and I wanted him to play with my hair some more, but he didn't. He just looked at me deviously and I wondered what was going through his mind. Or if I wanted to know.

"What do you think Hermione's up to right now?" he asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Probably in her bubble bath. Why?" I didn't like that he was bringing her up when I wanted him focused on me.

"We should totally go in there and throw shit at her," he said with a laugh.

"Throw shit at her? Like what?" I laughed right back. It was clear Draco was even more far gone than me.

"I don't know. Pillows. Anything. I'm not saying we lob hand grenades into the bath but I wanna piss her off. She's been harping on me all week. She deserves a little punishment," he said picking up a couch pillow and waving it in my face.

"No. We're not going into her bathroom while she's in the tub. She'll murder both of us," I shook my head.

"I've seen her naked before. Or most of her anyway. Haven't you seen her before?" he asked me curiously.

"No! Why would I have seen her naked?" I wondered.

"Because you live together. Things are bound to get weird once in a while. You mean you've never accidentally seen her naked?" he seemed disbelieving of this but I never had seen her naked. She's seen me in my underwear lots of times, but I've never seen her. I was always a gentlemen and looked away. I didn't really want to see it anyway.

"Even if I had seen her before, we're not gonna dump pillows on her in the bath," I protested vehemently.

"I'm gonna do it. Fuck it. She has it coming," Draco said as he grabbed up all the throw pillows on the couch and started to run up the stairs.

I went after him but almost fell a few times because it's hard to run when you're that inebriated. And the loafers Draco bought me were slippery too. I kept yelling after him, but he kept running and before I knew it we were in Hermione's room. There was a glow coming from under the bathroom door and I could hear classical music playing softly. She was going to kill both of us. Even if I'm the one who tried to stop him. But I was ineffectual and too late. He burst in the door and yelled, 'pillow fight!' at the top of his lungs as he began flinging couch pillows into the tub. Hermione screamed and yelled for him to get out and she was covering herself with the bubbles very nicely despite the attack. Water was getting splashed everywhere and Hermione was not pleased with either one of us. But mostly Draco.

"Get the fuck out of my bathroom! I'm naked here, you buffoon!" she screamed at Draco.

He just launched another pillow at her face and it flew off onto the tile floor.

"That's for making me re-do my report on house elves for you. _Three times_!" he laughed and launched another pillow at her face.

I don't even think he gave a shit she was naked and also his boss technically. He was just going for it. And I stood there trying to yank him out of the room. But it got slippery in there because of all the water on the floor and I slipped and tumbled right into the tub on top of Hermione. I didn't even know what to do, and neither did she. I was worried I almost killed her but she was still alive enough to yell for me to get the fuck off of her. And I tried! I really tried. But Draco still had pillows and then he slipped and fell too and fell on top of me in the tub. So essentially all three of us were in the bubble bath and Hermione was the only one naked. But being the gentlemen that I am, I covered her with my jacket while I told Draco to get out. But he kept slipping and almost hit his head and Hermione stopped screaming and started laughing. I thought maybe she'd lost her marbles or else drank so much wine this was now funny to her. But it was apparently just the ludicrousness of the moment that struck her.

"I swear to God, I'm going to fucking hex the shit out of both of you!" she yelled as she laughed and held my jacket over her nakedness. "What the fuck were you thinking?" she asked as she splashed water in Draco's face with her foot. But she was still laughing.

"I was mad at you for making me work too bloody hard. I thought this would be funny. I didn't wager I'd fall in the fucking tub on top of you," Draco laughed himself and made no move to get off of me or her.

"Mad at me for being your boss? I could have you fired for this little debacle, you imbecile!" she said kicking more water in his face.

That just caused him to splash water in her face which inadvertently caught me too because I was shielding her. Or trying to at least. Then it became a water fight instead of a pillow fight and somehow Hermione and Draco were attacking each other in the tub while I tried to stay between them. Finally we'd exhausted ourselves from the exertion and being really, really wasted. Hermione was lying there with my jacket on her fully now covering her up, while Draco and I both just sat in the tub with her. We didn't fit very well and most of the water was gone now. But Hermione did drink an entire bottle of wine by herself while we were gone, and that's probably the only reason Draco and I are still alive. But she finally spoke.

"I'm freezing now. You two lot get the fuck out of the tub while I get dried off," she said forcefully shoving me and Draco away from her.

We scrambled out of the tub and kept slipping around and I accidentally did catch sight of Hermione's nakedness as my jacket didn't cover her all the way. It did nothing for me, but Draco kept staring like an utter prat. He didn't even have the decency to pretend he hadn't seen her. He just stood there with his tongue hanging out of his mouth until I grabbed his arm forcefully and shoved him out of the bathroom. He was still laughing and I directed him to my room, even though we were getting water all over the floor and didn't have any towels. I figured we'd strip down in my room and I'd get us some. I didn't want to be anywhere near Hermione right now. Nor did I want Draco near her. Not with how he was looking at her in the tub. We got to my room and I just started pulling his clothes off and he pulled mine off and for a second I thought, holy shit, this is happening! But once he was naked, he just fell on my bed and crawled under the covers, never even bothering to dry off.

"I'm so hammered," he moaned softly into my pillows as I stood there naked myself but with a towel I had picked up off the floor.

"You're getting my bed all wet, you wanker," I said throwing another towel at him. He put it under his head at least and tried to dry it off.

"Why did I think it was a good idea to jump in the bathtub with my Armani suit on? That cost more than I make in a month and now it's ruined," he lamented.

"Hey, you wanted to throw the fucking pillows in the bath. It's not my fault you slipped and fell in. My suit cost a lot too and now it's also ruined because silk shrinks! And Hermione is lounging in what's left of her bath in my suit jacket!" I yelled at him. I didn't really care about the suit, but I was annoyed at his crazy behavior.

"I ruined your couch pillows too I think. Sorry mate," Draco sighed as he finally sat up in the bed and toweled his beautiful locks to a messy perfection. I couldn't stay mad at him.

"You want some boxers at least so you're not totally naked in my bed?" I offered with a raised eyebrow.

"Yes please."

I rooted in my drawer and found a pair of flannel boxers for him and a pair for myself. I was comfortable being nude in front of Draco, but if he was covering up, then so was I. It was still underwear and he was still in my bed. And I watched him pull the pants on and I just sighed inwardly at how amazing he looked naked. His body was chiseled perfection. I was just me. Nothing special really. Not as scrawny as I used to be, but definitely not chiseled. I crawled in the bed beside him and I admit I snuggled up to him. I couldn't help myself. It was cold. He didn't stop me. But Hermione on the other hand had other ideas. She came barging into the bedroom with two cans of silly string she'd gotten and Ron and George's joke shop. She jumped on the bed and sprayed us both in the face with it while laughing hysterically. She was in her bathrobe now and her assault on us was relentless. But we had it coming. We tried wrestling the cans out of her grasp, but the girl is strong. She wasn't letting go until my entire bed was covered in silly string and Draco and I both had to pull it off our faces in order to breathe. Then when the cans were empty she chucked them to the ground and started jumping on the bed hitting us with pillows. We really did have this coming. But Draco grabbed her by the waist and plunked her down onto the bed in the middle of us, and started tickling her. It was a terrible thing to witness because she's insanely ticklish, and I felt bad for her, but she had it coming too. We all had everything coming to us. But eventually she could take no more and cried mercy. Draco stopped and she just lay breathlessly in the bed with us, right in the middle. Her hair was a bushy disaster and her robe had come open slightly revealing she had on a nightgown now and wasn't naked any longer. Thank God.

But I don't know that Draco was thanking God. He just kept looking at her and playing with her hair and not mine. I could see the affection he had for her in his eyes and it pained me to witness. He didn't ever look at me quite like that when we were fooling around. I felt awkward in my own bed. But I didn't say anything. In fact, none of us really said anything. Except for when Hermione said she wanted to sleep with us. Now get your mind out of the gutter. She meant _actual_ sleep. She cozied down in between us and pulled both of us to her. I was okay with it, but I was less okay that Draco was there. He was liking it too much. And when he kissed her cheek before they fell asleep I suddenly realized that I was probably the intruder into something I couldn't ever compete with. Hermione was a mudblood, yes. In Draco's eyes. But she was a _girl_. And I wasn't. Therefore being with me was a freak show. And being with her, while unconventional in his family's eyes, was utterly ordinary to everyone else. I was probably always going to be the dirty little secret. And I wasn't okay with it. But I had no choice for the evening as sleep claimed me too.

In the morning I woke up first. Draco and Hermione were cuddled up together and I was a lone wolf by myself on the edge of the bed. I don't know how that happened because when we fell asleep I made sure my hand was touching Draco's hair. But I guess we all moved around when we slept. And the two of them were still snuggling like lovers. It really made me wonder what Hermione's true feelings were. She claimed she hated Draco, and was only nice to him for my sake. But would you snuggle with someone you hated? I doubted it. Which just brought me back to where I was months ago, wondering if I was standing in the way of true love. I didn't want that to be the case, but what if it was? What if Draco and Hermione really wanted to be together? But that thought was interrupted when Hermione awoke. She saw the predicament she was in and sat up straight and looked horrified. She then looked over at me and I just smiled.

"Oh God. Please tell me nothing kinky happened last night," she uttered miserably, scooting away from Draco and closer to me.

"Not really. I mean, unless you count the three of us taking a bubble bath together as kinky," I laughed slightly.

"Oh my God. I remember that now! You two are idiots! And how did I get here?" she wondered not remembering her night very clearly. Must have been some bottle of wine.

"You attacked us with silly string. Don't you remember? And then there was a pillow fight and a tickle fight. It was all very innocent. I promise you," I swore to her.

"I remember now. That was funny. The silly string part. Not the rest of it. What on earth possessed you two to invade my bath and throw pillows at me?" she asked with a huff.

"It was Draco's plan! I tried to stop him. But after a while you kind of seemed okay with it," I shrugged slightly.

"I wasn't okay with it. Far from it. You two embarrassed me to death. And why am I snuggly wuggly with Draco. I didn't do anything with him did I?"

"No love, you didn't," Draco said as he was apparently awake now and listening to us. He just yawned and pulled the pillow over his face.

"Good. I better not have. That would just be wrong and weird," she said trying to smooth down her wild mane of bushy hair.

"Yeah, pretty fucking weird since I was in the bed with you guys all night. Come on Hermione, you know nothing happened," I ribbed her playfully.

"I just didn't know what to think waking up like this. The night is coming back to me though. I just can't believe you both saw me naked," she said regretfully.

"I didn't mean to!" I proclaimed.

"I meant to, but it's not like I haven't seen most of it before. I've been up close and personal with that body," Draco reminded her as he took the pillow off his face.

"Don't remind me. Ugh. I just wanted a quiet night and instead I get assaulted with pillows in the bath and have no choice but to retaliate," she said indignantly.

"You got us good though. Look at my bed," I motioned for her to see all the silly string lying around all smooshed into my duvet.

"Look at your hair. You've got silly string embedded in the mess," she giggled playing with my hair.

"Is it in my hair too?" Draco asked, sitting up to face both of us.

I laughed at him. He had pink silly string all over his beautiful locks. I reached over and tried to pull some of it off.

"It's everywhere. And this shit never comes off if you spray it too close to someone," I said.

"This is just great. My hair is ruined and so is my suit. Thanks a lot Hermione," Draco said giving her a slight shove.

"Hey, you had it coming. And it's not my fault you fell into my bathtub!"

"I don't even know what I was thinking with that one. But it seemed like a good idea at the time," he laughed slightly.

"Next time you do something like that, I'll call the police," she told him huffily.

"The police? Come on. You had fun. At least admit that. I saw you laughing too!" Draco insisted.

"I was not! Okay, well maybe a little. It was so absurd I couldn't help myself," she said in a small voice.

"Stuffy Hermione knows how to have fun, she just doesn't like to spread it around," Draco ribbed her.

"I'm not stuffy!"

"Guys, stop! My head hurts. I can't listen to the back and forth right now," I said, trying to put an end to their friendly banter.

I admit my head did hurt, but not that much. I just didn't want them talking to each other so much. I'm a terrible friend and I know it. But her presence in my bed was messing up my plan to snuggle with Draco all morning. That is if he'd let me. But he never would let me with Hermione in the bed.

"I'm getting up anyway. I'm putting on coffee. If either of you want some, I'll be in the kitchen," Hermione said, taking my subtle hint and vacating the bed.

Draco just looked after her with lustful eyes. There was no denying the attraction that was there. But he was attracted to me too! That much I knew as well. I wanted him to focus on that attraction and not the one for her. Once she was gone, I turned to Draco and smiled. He smiled back and attempted to get up out of the bed. I practically tackled him back down.

"What the fuck are you doing?" he laughed at me with my arms around his waist.

"I was gonna help you get the silly string out of your hair," I muttered awkwardly as an excuse to keep him in bed with me longer.

"I could do it myself in the mirror," he noted.

"Yeah, well just let me help," I urged him.

So we sat cross legged across from each other and we both picked out bits of string from each other's hair. I felt like monkey's in a zoo picking fleas off each other as a sign of affection. But Hermione really did a number on us. And my bed I feared was actually ruined. At least the duvet. But so were most of our couch throw pillows too. They were likely lying in the bathroom in Hermione's room all soggy and useless along with my suit jacket we paid so much for.

"We really should get the throw pillows out of the bathroom . Use our wands to dry them off again?" I offered as I pulled the last bits of string from his hair.

"Yeah. Maybe we can salvage your jacket? I know you just got that thing and I bollocksed it up for you."

"It's okay."

"You looked real good in that suit, Potter," he told me sincerely.

"I did?" I was momentarily shocked to hear a compliment like that.

"Yeah, you did. Very handsome. Not as handsome as me, but it's a start," he added jokingly, to lighten the mood.

"No one ever looks as good as you do," I said truthfully, hoping it would endear me to him further.

"If I didn't know better, I'd think you were trying to seduce me," he laughed.

"What if I was?" I asked boldly.

He became agitated at this and raked his hands through his hair. He got out of the bed.

"I'd say that someone was breaking the rules that I've painstakingly followed and I'd be a little cross," he told me seriously.

"I was just kidding!" I lied to save face. "God, take a joke why don't you?"

"You better be kidding. Because I meant what I said at the club. My father can't ever know what we did before. And it can't happen again."

"I know Draco. I'm sorry. It was just a joke. I was fooling around. I know we're just friends now," I said trying not to burst into tears at this entire thing.

I wanted him so much but being friends was my bloody perfect idea. And now I was the one who wanted more. I always wanted more. And I knew I would. But Draco didn't. And I had to accept that. Somehow. No matter what transpired between us before, it was apparently over. He was too afraid of his father's wrath if anyone found out. And he'd rather live a lie than be with me. It was fucked up, I thought. But I couldn't force him to love me. And I didn't want to lose his friendship. So I knew I had to tone it back down again. For both our sakes.

"You're the one who asked me to stop playing games with you lot. And I did. Don't be the one starting them up again," he chided me.

"So is that all it really was with me and you? A game?" I asked feeling wounded by his words.

"Yes. It was just a game. But I actually like you and Hermione so I want to be friends. That's it. So take it or leave it. But I don't want to play games with people I care about," he said earnestly.

I wasn't sure how to feel. On one hand, he was saying that everything before had just been a game. Which sucked. But then he was also saying he cared a lot about me and Hermione both. He wanted us in his life. I just didn't understand how or why a person who felt that way could play games like that in the first place. Draco was one warped person sometimes. But I still hadn't given up the idea of trying to save him. I just had no idea how I was going to do it. Or if he wanted it done. But I was gonna be patient. Good things come to those who wait. And I was prepared to wait forever for him. I loved him that much.

 **To be continued….Please leave some feedback for this story! I'm hoping you all are enjoying this twisted love story.**


	11. Chapter 11

**Disclaimer:** I own none of the characters here. JK Rowling and company own them. I merely play with them for my own amusement. Please don't sue. I have nothing of value anyway.

 **Summary:** Harry is caught in a love triangle to rival all else. He's found himself questioning his sexuality and is owning up to his attraction to Draco Malfoy. Meanwhile Draco is cozying up to Hermione, who won't give him the time of day. And Hermione keeps thinking there's hope for her and Harry to have a future together. It's a tangled web of emotions and will anyone get what they want? Set a couple of years after Hogwarts ended. Told from Harry's POV. Drarry, with undertones of Dramione.

 **Three is a Crowd**

When Christmas came, I was depressed because Draco was spending the entire day with his family. That just left Hermione and I alone, and she'd accepted an invite from the Weasley's to have supper with them. This was going to prove highly awkward because Ron used to be my best friend. And nothing happened to make him not my best friend, except I just stopped talking to him. First it would be a few days in between our conversations, and then weeks and then months. But he never really tried to remedy the situation either because he'd found a new girlfriend and spent most of his time with her. Sasha. I'd never even met her. But Ron was smitten, just like I was smitten with Draco and our worlds just didn't connect. And I knew I could never in a million years tell him I was gay or that I was in love with Draco. He'd kill me. Not for the gay part, but the Draco part. He'd probably be shocked to hear I was gay, but I'm sure he'd support me. But he'd never support anything to do with Draco. So I wasn't sure what I was going to say to him when I saw him. But Hermione was adamant that we show up at their place because she didn't want to cook a large meal for the two of us. And I didn't blame her. We were the orphans with no families of our own. And it was just tradition we go to the Weasley's. But I used to talk to Ron a lot more than I did now. Now it would just be awkward.

But I steeled myself for the visit. I didn't have to tell Ron anything I didn't want to. Or at least that's what Hermione told me. She said she would keep our secrets because she didn't want to let Ron know she had a dalliance with Draco either. He'd never understand. When we arrived at the Burrow with presents for everyone, I'd forgotten how welcoming and loving Molly was. She was a great woman. The only mother I've ever really known, even if she's not mine. But in her eyes, everything was normal and Ron and I hadn't been estranged all these long months. She treated me like I belonged there. And it was the same for Hermione, even though she and Ron had broken up years ago. She was still considered part of the clan. When I came face to face with Ron for the first time he kind of glared at me. But then he broke into a smile and hugged me.

"It's been forever, mate. How've you been?" he asked politely.

"I've been good. Mostly. I kind of fucked up my maiden Auror mission, and got hurt, but I'm okay now," I explained to him.

"Yeah, yeah, I heard all about it. I read it in the paper. I meant to send you an owl to see how you were, but time got away from me," he admitted softly, looking away from me.

"It's okay. I was fine. Just some scratches mostly," I lied, trying not to be hurt that my supposed best friend knew I was injured and never even asked how I was. But I pushed it aside. "So how are you? How's Sasha?"

"Sasha is great. She's stopping by soon for supper. She just had to spend some time with her grandmum first. You'll get to meet her. So is there a girl in your life?" he asked, glancing over at Ginny who I was trying to avoid like the plague.

"Nope. No girl for me. But I am sort of interested in someone," I admitted, being coy on purpose. I was just feeling Ron out. I'd never tell him who it was.

"Really? Well I hope she wakes up and realizes you like her. You deserve to be happy," Ron said kindly.

He was being awfully nice for someone who never talked to me anymore. And that was just as much his fault as it was mine. But I guess sometimes people don't stay friends forever. That's just a myth. Once you're out of school, people tend to go their separate ways. It was no different for us, I guess. But I always thought it would be. After all, Hermione and I stayed close friends through it all. And I had to verbalize my thoughts with Ron.

"So how come I never hear from you ever? Are you really that busy at the joke shop?" I wondered curiously.

"I never hear from you either, Harry. I figured you were busy with work and such. I don't know. Sasha takes up most of my time," he admitted somewhat regretfully.

"I'm sorry I've been so out of touch. Life has been kind of weird, honestly. But I've missed you," I added and it was the truth. I loved Ron. I just didn't love him the way I loved Draco. And that's where I focused all my energies these days.

"It's okay. I could understand better if there was a bird in your life. I mean, I've got Sasha."

"Well there is someone in my life, it's just that we're friends. And that's probably all we'll ever be. But I'm rather smitten with them," I confessed.

"Who is it? It's not Hermione is it? Did you two finally cave in and do the deed?" Ron laughed slightly.

"No, it's not Hermione! Why would you think that?" I asked curiously.

"Because she's head over heels in love with you. Any ninny can see that. I just wondered if you'd ever catch a clue," Ron said plainly.

"She's really in love with me?" I asked with confusion that anyone else would know her wayward feelings so well.

"Of course she is. I wager she has been for years. Maybe that's why we didn't work out? I know that's why you and Ginny didn't work out," he added surely.

"What? That's crazy. That's not why Ginny and I didn't work out! Who told you that?" I wanted to know.

"Ginny did. She said you were in love with Hermione and that's why you broke up."

I wasn't sure whether to be thrilled she didn't state the real reason for our breakup or be pissed that she lied and made it seem like I was in love with my best friend. I guess she was trying to save face because it didn't sound too good to tell people I was unable to get it hard to fuck her and that's why we broke up. I was sexually inadequate and wasn't attracted to her. I guess that sounds worse than saying I was in love with someone else. But it wasn't true. Not for me. Maybe for Hermione but she knew now that nothing was gonna happen between us since I'd come out to her as gay. But Ron of course didn't know this. And neither did Ginny. And I intended to keep it that way.

"I'm not in love with Hermione. Ginny and I just weren't compatible," I stated finally.

"Well whoever has gotten your attention, I really hope you get them. Like I said, you deserve to be happy."

And with that, he walked off and left me alone for a moment before Molly ushered me to the living room so we could all talk. A task I wasn't looking forward to since there was nothing in my life I wanted to talk to them about. And Ginny was there with a new boyfriend, which just made things even more awkward than they already were. Hermione seemed quite at home talking to George and Angelina most of the evening. But I felt left out. Especially when the amazing Sasha arrived and I realized Ron had landed himself quite the beauty. She was gorgeous. I'm gay, but not blind. No wonder he never gets out of bed long enough to write me or call me. I finally got it. If I had a dish like that, I'd probably ditch everyone else I knew too. But I knew it was my fault too. I had this Draco obsession and to me he was just as gorgeous as Sasha was. Only Sasha seemed like a nice person and genuine and not fucked up and broken like Draco was. She didn't need Ron's hero services, but Draco needed mine. He just didn't know it yet.

Once the supper ended and we all opened our gifts, it was time for Hermione and I to go home. We took some extra pie with us to eat later and we apparated back home to our flat. Hermione had hung mistletoe above the doorway and she caught me standing under it. She leaned up and gave me a kiss, but it was a friendly kiss. I was taken aback momentarily though until she pointed it out.

"Mistletoe. I had to kiss you," she smiled at me as she walked over and put her present bags down along with the pie.

"I thought you'd just lost your mind for a moment," I chuckled softly, wishing I could get Draco under the mistletoe. But he wasn't here. And I didn't know when I'd see him next. Probably long after we had mistletoe hanging in the house. He had taken two weeks' vacation from work for the holidays. So I hadn't seen him since the day before Christmas Eve. I missed him already and wished I could be with him. Even if it meant sitting through a Malfoy Christmas dinner. It would be worth it. But I just decided to sit on the sofa and watch Christmas movies on the telly with Hermione dutifully at my side. I smiled at her as we watched It's A Wonderful Life for the thousandth time. But she loved that old movie. And I just noted how beautiful she was and how she was wasting her time waiting for me, if that's what she was really doing. And I told her so.

"What do you mean I'm wasting my time with you?" she asked confusedly.

"I'm not ever gonna be the man you deserve and sometimes I think I'm holding you back from what you really want," I admitted softly, thinking of her cuddling Draco in my bed while they slept.

"I'm not missing anything nor are you holding me back. I'm just not interested in anyone right now. Don't worry about me," she said, softly ruffling my hair and giving me a kiss on the cheek.

"What about Draco? Are you sure you don't really want to be with him?" I asked curiously, needing to know the answer.

But she just stared at me for a moment, then shook her head.

"Draco and I would never work out. You said so yourself. I'm just a mudblood to him. Or at least to his family. Thankfully he doesn't call me that anymore, or I'd pummel him. But the point is, it's not happening. And I know how you feel for him, so I'd never go there again," she explained.

"Yeah, but do you want him? I don't care if it might not work out or what my feelings are. Do you want him?" I prodded her.

She just sighed and shook her head.

"It's late, Harry. I'm going to bed. Stop worrying so much."

She never really answered my question and she just kissed my cheek and headed up the stairs, leaving me to my own thoughts. I think she did want him. She just didn't want to admit it. I hated the life she'd carved out for herself. Being in love with me was a huge mistake on her part. And if she loved Draco too, it was even worse. I felt sorry for her, and I realized she wouldn't like me feeling sorry for her. So I just felt sorry for me. I loved someone I'd never have too. Maybe Hermione and I should get married? Maybe we could still be happy without sex? Nah, I doubted that. She deserved someone to love her the right way. And so did I, damn it. We both deserved real love. And I feared we'd never get it. Not as long as we lived together like this. But I wasn't exactly eager to make her move out. She was all I really had. And I was all she had. We needed each other. And our friendship wasn't going to be tossed along the wayside like my friendship with Ron. I wouldn't let it. But then I questioned how good of a friend I really was if I was keeping her from Draco. Before I had time to process that thought all the way, someone knocked on my door. I wasn't expecting any visitors so I grabbed my wand and approached the door cautiously.

"Who's there?" I asked pointing my wand at the door.

"It's me. Let me in," Draco said through the door.

I visibly relaxed and opened the door for him. He walked in and didn't say a word at first. He just stood there looking glum and I noticed he was under the mistletoe. Should I go for it? Nah. He looked too upset by something for me to assault him with my lips. So I just asked him what was wrong.

"I just had a stressful evening with the folks. That's all. I could use something to drink," he said taking off his jacket and throwing it over my chair and moving away from the mistletoe. He sat on the couch and I went to the kitchen to pour him his favorite drink. I brought it out to him and sat down next to him.

"So what happened?" I wondered curiously.

He took a long sip of the drink and set it down on the coffee table.

"I've met my wife to be now. My father had her there. I didn't know what to bloody do," he said getting emotional and near tears.

"Your wife to be? You're engaged now?" I asked with some horrification.

"Not yet, but I will be. This was just our first meeting. But she's all handpicked for me. Her name is Astoria. I don't even know her!" Draco cried.

"So just don't do it. They can't really _make_ you marry her."

"Oh yes they can. They can take away my money if I don't do as I'm told."

"So? You have a job."

"Yeah, a thankless boring job that doesn't pay very well," he pointed out. "I'm accustomed to living a certain way. If they take all that away from me…"

"Draco you can't marry a girl you don't love. It's ridiculous," I said, feeling my heart beating out of my chest. I was losing him. Losing all of him. And I couldn't help myself from reaching out to caress the side of his face. He leaned into the caress and placed his hand on top of mine and just held it there.

"What else can I do, Harry? They own me," he said sadly, looking me deep in the eyes.

I knew what I was about to do was breaking all the rules and there wasn't even mistletoe to use as an excuse, but I leaned over and kissed him softly. At first he bristled at my intrusion, and then he just melted into me and kissed me hard on the mouth, his hands tangling in my messy hair. We were lost for a moment, until he finally came back down to earth and realized what he'd done.

"I'm sorry Harry. I shouldn't have kissed you back. And you shouldn't have kissed me! It's against the rules," he chastised me.

"I had to. I don't want to lose you, Draco. I know you have feelings for me still. That kiss just proved it," I said desperately.

"It doesn't matter what I feel Harry. This with you? It's wrong. And I can't do it," he shook his head.

"It's not wrong. It's just not what your parents would want. But you cannot let them ruin your life. Would we even still be friends if you married this Astoria girl?" I had to wonder.

"Of course we would be. But there'd be a lot less time together of course. I'd have to go home to her after work and spend weekends shopping for antiques or something with her. God only knows," he said miserably.

"Then don't do it."

"I have no real choice."

"Then do what you want before that time comes," I urged him, trying to get him back in my arms.

"But I don't really know what it is I want. That's the trouble. We're already breaking the rules here tonight, but I don't want to break them further by discussing my feelings. That's just not something I want to do right now. Or at all," he said, rising from the couch and pacing around.

"Why not though? I'll listen to your feelings. And I won't judge them. That's more than your family can say to you."

"Look Potter, I like you a lot. I really fucking do. And I'm attracted to you as well. But I still have feelings for someone else too. And the real kicker is, none of these people are my wife to be," he explained.

I deflated a lot when I realized he was talking about Hermione. I knew something was still going on between them even though it wasn't overt and neither of them would admit it. But he was in love with her. I could tell. He didn't have to say anything. He was attracted to me, but he loved her. And I couldn't compete. But I could still try and save him from a life he'd be miserable in.

"If you love Hermione, you should tell her. I-I think it would make a difference," I said to him almost inaudibly because I couldn't believe I was suggesting such a thing.

He just looked at me. Then he shook his head. Then he gulped the last of his drink and slammed the glass back onto the table and raked his hands through his hair.

"It wouldn't make a difference. She's a mudblood, Harry. My parents would never approve. The only thing that would give them more of an aneurysm would be to admit I loved you too," he whispered.

I stood up to face him.

"You love me?" I asked never dreaming I'd hear him say those words to me.

"I do love you, Harry. I've always loved you. I know I was the worst person in the world to you for years, but it was just me masking my real feelings. I wanted them to go away. I still bloody want them gone. No good can come of it," he said pacing back and forth anxiously.

"Just don't get married. We can still be together in secret. If that's what you want. I'm willing to be the secret," I said desperately, sounding foolish, I know. But that's how bad I wanted him.

"Potter, it's not just you though. It's fucking Hermione. I'm in love with both of you. What the fuck am I supposed to do with that? I can't have you both! I can't have either one of you really. My life is well and truly fucked," he said, disappearing into my kitchen to presumably grab the bottle of whiskey I had in there.

That just left me standing there wondering what the fuck to say to him. How could I fix this? Can you really be in love with two people? Is that possible? Two people of opposite genders? Is that what bisexuality was like? Or was this a special case? I didn't know. And didn't know how to help him, even if saving him from himself was my self-proclaimed mission in life. Sometimes people's lives were too screwed up to be salvaged. All I knew was that I wanted to hold him and never let go. So when he came back with the whiskey bottle, chugging straight from it, I grabbed it out of his hands and put it on the table. Then I just wrapped my arms around him and held him tightly. He rested his head on top of mine and I heard him start to cry. I hated knowing he was this sad, but it showed me he was human. He lied before when he said things with us were a game. He was in love with both of us. It was just easier to call it a game than to admit he was in an impossible situation. We soon fell onto the couch and I continued to hold him and let him cry. He had a lot pent up inside him and I wanted to make sure he got it all out.

He finally pulled away from me and wiped his eyes. I could see he felt foolish, but I rubbed his arm to let him know it was okay.

"Are you alright now?" I whispered softly.

"No. I'm not," he whispered back.

"What can I do to help?"

"Nothing, Potter. There's nothing you can do to help. I guess I just have to enjoy my last bit of freedom before I'm married off."

"We can do anything you want. You name it. It's like a bucket list except you aren't dying," I informed him.

"Feels like I'm dying."

"But you're not."

"Okay then I want to go on a skiing holiday," he said as he wiped his eyes and tried to regain his composure.

"A skiing holiday?"

"Yes. With you and Hermione. It might be my last time to go anywhere without Astoria in tow. Let's make it happen," he said somewhat excitedly.

"But we have to work. We didn't put in for time off," I pointed out to him.

"So? You're Harry Potter. Just tell them you're taking the time. It'll just be a weekend. Like this coming weekend. The French Alps. It's perfect."

"What about Hermione?"

"She's the fucking boss. If she wants time off, she just takes it. Talk her into it, will you? I know she loves to ski."

"How do you know that?" I wondered.

"She told me."

"Alright. If that's what you want. But there might not be any rooms left at a resort on such short notice. It is the holidays."

"Pfft. There's always a room available if you show them enough cash."

"Okay then. Skiing it is. It's kind of a strange request, but if that's what'll make you happy…"

"What will make me happy is the company I keep. The skiing is just a bonus," he smiled slightly.

Then he leaned over and kissed my cheek and ruffled my hair again the way I loved so much. I had to do this for him. He would do it for me. And this simple request was something I felt certain I could talk Hermione into. Especially because I knew she had some wayward feelings for him herself and just wouldn't admit them. She was likely going to be sad at this news of Astoria too. But he wasn't married yet. And we were going to have the time of our lives before that could come to fruition. I was going to see to it.

 **To be continued….Please leave some feedback for this story! I'm hoping you all are enjoying this twisted love story.**


	12. Chapter 12

**Disclaimer:** I own none of the characters here. JK Rowling and company own them. I merely play with them for my own amusement. Please don't sue. I have nothing of value anyway.

 **Summary:** Harry is caught in a love triangle to rival all else. He's found himself questioning his sexuality and is owning up to his attraction to Draco Malfoy. Meanwhile Draco is cozying up to Hermione, who won't give him the time of day. And Hermione keeps thinking there's hope for her and Harry to have a future together. It's a tangled web of emotions and will anyone get what they want? Set a couple of years after Hogwarts ended. Told from Harry's POV. Drarry, with undertones of Dramione.

 **Three is a Crowd**

After our talk about the skiing holiday, Draco told me he didn't want to go home. He wanted to stay with me. So I offered to have him stay in my room with me since it was warmer than the couch. He readily accepted and we made our way up the stairs holding hands the entire way. I had no idea what to expect from this night as Draco had admitted to loving me earlier. Would something happen between us again? Would he initiate it this time? Would we have sex? I had no idea, but I was ready for anything. We got into my room and started undressing for bed, but unlike after the bathtub encounter we weren't ripping each other's clothes off. It was a solitary endeavor but that didn't make me less excited. When we crawled into bed together, I immediately cuddled up to him. I wanted to feel him next to me. I wanted his warmth to be near me. And I think he wanted it too because he pulled me close and kissed my ear and just held me tightly. I could tell he was emotionally exhausted from earlier and his outburst, but I didn't want him to fall asleep yet.

"Draco?" I asked softly.

"Yes?"

"I love you."

There was a few moments of silence and then Draco kissed my cheek and whispered into my ear.

"I love you too."

And then he just nestled his face in my neck and proceeded to fall asleep despite my longings for something else to happen between us. But he was drunk and tired and emotionally drained. I understood why he fell asleep. But I couldn't sleep because I just kept thinking of him being married off to some bird none of us knew. Astoria. What a name. Where did she even come from? I don't remember her from school. But then again I didn't know many Slytherin's, of which I assumed she was one. Of course, maybe she went to a different wizarding school like Beauxbatons? Anything was possible. And Draco said he didn't know her so the likelihood of her being a Slytherin was small. Unless she was really super young. What if she was just eighteen now and we never paid attention to her because she was so much younger than us? I just really wanted to know more about her. I wondered if it was at all possible Draco would learn to love her. What if she was a terrible person? He deserved better than that.

Finally sleep claimed me and I was awoken when Draco squeezed me tightly and then rolled away from me. I felt the absence of his body crushed next to mine and it woke me up. I looked over my shoulder to see what he was doing and he was pulling on his trousers.

"Leaving so soon?" I asked with disappointment.

"I need some coffee. I can smell it from the kitchen. You don't mind if I go get a cup do you?" he asked with a yawn.

"No, that's fine. I'll come with," I said, throwing back the covers.

"Harry, if it's all the same to you, I'd like to speak to Hermione alone for a minute. I want to be the one who tells her about the situation and the skiing holiday. You don't mind, do you?" he asked me cautiously.

"No I don't mind," I lied.

I did in fact mind quite a lot, but what good would it do for me to stop him. He loved her too. He wanted his moment with her. He already had his moment with me. All night as it happens. I shouldn't complain, but sometimes I still do. I just wish it wasn't as complicated as it was. Loving me was enough to make him lose his trust fund and his mind, but loving _two_ people? I didn't know how I'd handle something like that. Especially when there was this third person everyone wanted you to marry. It made no real sense to me. I just wished there was something I could do to stop this. Like run down the aisle during the wedding and proclaim my undying devotion. Or make him marry Hermione so at least he'd be in my life somewhat. Although they might move out of my house if they married. No sense sharing space with me if that happened. But it wasn't going to happen. Just like it wasn't going to happen for me and Draco either. I knew I needed to let him go eventually, but today was not that day. And I seethed up in my room, wondering what was going on downstairs in my kitchen over coffee. I was going to give them an acceptable amount of time to talk and then I was just barging in. It was my house too. I didn't want to be locked in my room while things transpired downstairs in my kitchen.

So I waited and waited and after twenty minutes, I got myself dressed and out of bed. I crept down the stairs wondering if I'd catch them in a compromising position on the couch or something, but it appeared they were both still in the kitchen. So I went in there and found Hermione and Draco sitting at the kitchen table holding hands and drinking coffee together. They let go of their hands immediately when they saw me, but it was too late. I'd caught them. And Hermione looked away from me guiltily.

"Draco was just telling me his woes. I felt bad for him. That's why I was holding his hand," she tried to explain.

I just held up my own hand and stopped her from speaking.

"No worries. I'm just gonna get some coffee. Did Draco tell you about the holiday he wants to take?" I asked, trying to be cool about the entire thing, but I really wasn't.

"Yes, he told me all about it. In fact, he booked us all a suite at one of the best resorts. I've seen the place before when I went skiing with my folks in the past. Sometimes it's fun to have a rich friend," she smiled slightly.

"Just one room eh? For all three of us?" I inquired curiously.

"Afraid that's all they had left. The presidential suite. But there are sofas in the room someone could sleep on. But really, why the pretense of that? We've all slept in your bed on more than one occasion. I think we can handle it," Draco laughed slightly.

"True. I guess I thought maybe Hermione and I would have our own room," I said trying to erase the image of them holding hands out of my mind.

"No, maybe another time? Of which I know there likely won't be another time. But still," Draco mumbled.

"I'm going to get dressed," Hermione said as she rose from the table clad only in her robe and nightgown again. I watched as Draco watched her leave and then he sighed and laid his head on the table.

"So how did Hermione take the news about Astoria?" I asked as I replaced her in the chair in front of him.

"She didn't take it well. She said it was ridiculous to marry a person I didn't love. Pretty much how you reacted. She thinks I should tell my parents to shove it. But I can't. I don't know how to do that," he confessed.

"It might not be easy, and you might lose your money, but wouldn't it be worth it to live life the way you want?" I wondered.

Draco laughed bitterly.

"Right, because the life I want is so simple. I'm in love with two people. I can't choose one. Do I marry you both? Is that how I fix my life? Face it Harry, this is probably a blessing because it gets me out of this twisted triangle of crap I'm in now."

I didn't like to think of our love being called a twisted triangle of crap, but I did understand where he was coming from. The situation was far from ideal. I still didn't understand how a person loved more than one person. Eventually you'd have to choose one or the other. But I guess that's why he said this would simple up his life. He was choosing a third person that he didn't even love at all, just to get out of the mess we're in. I don't even know how it got to this point. But I was glad that I knew who I loved and wanted to be with even if I shared a spot in that person's heart with someone else. At least I had a part of him his wife would never have. But that just made me even more sad for his future. What if he never loved Astoria at all? Would we be secret lovers behind her back? Or would he choose to go that route with Hermione instead? Or would he really be done with us both and remain faithful and loyal to his wife? I had no idea and knew now wasn't the time to ask him. He'd likely thought of all the scenarios already and didn't want to talk about them with me yet. Or maybe ever. Sometimes Draco didn't like to talk about stuff. But I usually got him to open up pretty good when I tried. But this was a question I wasn't going to ask. How can you ask a man to cheat on his wife with you? I'd be the worst kind of person in the world. And that's not me. Or at least I don't want it to be me.

I finally found something I could say though, so I said it.

"I'm sorry that you're in a twisted triangle of crap. I certainly never meant to cause this situation," I told him.

"I know that. It's not your fault. Hell, I don't think it's anyone's fault really. Neither of you asked for this. And I certainly didn't ask for it. It all just happened," he explained. "Like I said, I've loved you for years Harry. But I never dreamed we'd act on that or that you'd even give me the time of day. And with Hermione? It was a slower burn. I was obsessed with her in school and when we started working together, I just couldn't help but fall for her. It wasn't school anymore and I didn't have anyone to impress by insulting either one of you. So I just became your friend. And then my feelings just went haywire. How can you choose between two amazing people that are completely and totally different?"

I had no real good answer to that, but part of me wanted to know who he'd choose if he had to and there was no Astoria. But I think I knew the answer was Hermione just because it was less scandalous. So I didn't even ask. I just changed the subject entirely and asked about the vacation.

"You know, I've only gone skiing once and I didn't do so well at it. Turns out I'm not as naturally gifted with skis as I was with a broom," I chuckled softly, trying to break the tension.

"They have a bunny slope. Or you could always sip cocoa in the lodge all day while Hermione and I skied?" he posed to me with a slight smirk.

"That sounds awful to me. I'll just have to try harder to keep up. I don't want to be left out."

"You won't be. I promise. There's always sledding too, if that's more your speed. They have a children's area."

"Great, the children's area. Just where I wanna spend my time," I laughed.

He was smiling at me now and it felt good to know I could distract him enough to smile at least. I just wish I could fix his problem.

A few days went by and Hermione and I busied ourselves in our free time planning for the holiday. We were taking Friday off and going to the ski lodge with Draco. We saw him in the evenings when he'd inevitably show up on our doorstep wanting to drink. He drank a lot more than usual now. But we always let him in and a couple times we joined him in drink. Which led to some comical moments where we tried to play Twister and almost tied ourselves in knots. We also played wizard chess and poker too. Hermione taught us how to play that one. She's a bluffer. She won almost every time. But I just chalked it up to her knowing the game a lot better than Draco and I did. But we had fun together. The three of us. And Hermione no longer protested being in his presence. I think because we all knew there was so little time left. We weren't even sure how long we had. Draco was avoiding his family right now, which meant he was avoiding talking about his upcoming wedding. But it still loomed over us and I wasn't even jealous of Hermione anymore. Not after we talked and I realized she did in fact care very much for Draco. She admitted it. But she wanted to be a good friend and let me have him. But now that I wasn't having him either, we both sort of felt like we should just share our time with him. That's how much I loved her. I was willing to share the man I was crazy about with her, just so she'd be happy too. And Draco didn't really know what to do with himself because he had two people paying attention to him. But it was kind of great. The three of us had more fun in just a few days than I can remember ever having in my life.

Once we got to the ski lodge they let us up to our room. It was spectacular. A view of the slopes from the picturesque windows and a hot tub right in the room. Plus a large king sized bed which we all jumped on once we got inside. We were laughing and joking and Draco said the bed was great for a threesome. He got smacked by both of us for that one. But it was a friendly smack. No damage done. And he just said we'd come around eventually. He was loving the attention and having two people that he loved fawning over him. But it felt like we had so much to do and like time was running out. Which is kind of silly because Draco was going to get married, not die. It's not as if we'd never see him again. But we also knew things would never be like this again, so therein lied the urgency to enjoy every second. We were lying on the big bed together with Hermione and I both laying on Draco's chest. He had his arms around both of us and we were just drinking in the atmosphere. Until I spoke that is.

"So does Daddy know where you are this weekend?" I wondered curiously.

"Are you kidding, Potter? Of course not. I told him I was sick. I've pretended to be sick all week actually. He's going to send healers to my door probably if I keep it up," Draco admitted.

"Maybe you should have told him you left town?" Hermione piped up.

"Nah, then he'd ask a lot of questions about who I was with. I don't need to tell him. He'll give up eventually. He must know I'm avoiding him. I was so taken aback by my so-called Christmas present in Astoria, that I think he understood just how cross I was. I wasn't very polite. She probably hates me already and is running away from her family too with her secret lovers," Draco laughed slightly.

"Do you think she has lovers? Or a lover, singular? Or do you think she's really waiting for you?" I asked him.

"I haven't a clue. She's very young. She might be waiting for me. But I'm not waiting for her. That's for damn sure," he said with a sigh.

"Maybe she won't be so bad?" Hermione offered him.

"Yeah, maybe?" I backed her up.

"Look, I really, really don't want to talk about Astoria. Let's just pretend she doesn't exist okay? We still have tons of daylight left. Why don't we hit the slopes for a bit? The room will still be here later," he said getting up from the bed and leaving us both wanting his touch again. But neither of us verbalized it.

We just got ready to hit the slopes and I was nervous because like I mentioned to Draco, I'm not a very good skier. But I wanted to keep up with them because they've been doing this all their lives. So I got into the chair lift with them and we rode to the top of the mountain. It was so high up I thought for sure I would die or at least break every bone I had coming down. But I managed to do okay for myself. I only crashed into a snow bank a few times, but then I was able to get myself together enough to go down the rest of the way. They'd beaten me though and were both fretting at the bottom of the mountain over me. They worried I'd perished violently on the hill. But I raced up to them and got snow all over them as I crashed at their feet and rolled onto my back.

"I made it!" I proclaimed happily even though I crashed and burned at their feet.

"Harry! Are you alright?" Hermione worried about me.

"I'm fine. I'm fine. I didn't die, so go me!" I said trying to pick myself off the ground.

"We thought you hit a tree or something when didn't come down right after us," Draco said sounding concerned.

"I'm not that inept. I'll be fine. We can go again if you want to?" I offered, even though I really had enough already but we'd barely even started. I _was_ more suited to the bunny hill or the cocoa in the lodge. But I was determined to be a trooper.

So we went up the mountain again and again and tried different runs. I sucked at all of them, but I did get a little better as the day wore on. Soon it was nightfall though and even though the slopes were well lit, I managed to talk the two of them into stopping and having supper at least. So we trudged into the lodge and deposited all our gear in the appropriate spots and got dressed in our nice clothes for supper. Hermione wore a blue dress that made her look spectacular, I had to admit. And I was in another suit I'd gotten after my first nice suit got ruined in the bath. Draco of course always looked smashing. We got a table in the restaurant and ordered two bottles of wine. Hermione said she could polish off one by herself and I was certain Draco and I could too. We ended ordering four bottles of wine altogether and I'm not sure which one of us was more drunk. We all were. Very, very drunk. And we tumbled into the lift to go back to our room and Hermione and I both were hanging on Draco's arm. But he was so drunk himself he kept telling us we were going to make him fall over. So we tried to stand on our own.

Once we got to our room Draco started taking off his clothes. He wanted to go in the hot tub, which I wasn't sure was such a good idea with all of us so drunk. But I supposed you probably couldn't drown in a hot tub. So I took off my clothes too and we were both just in our boxers. Hermione was a little shyer and didn't want to come in at first. But then we reminded her how we jumped into her bathtub that one time while she was naked so she had me unzip her dress and she slipped into the hot tub in her knickers and bra. I noticed Draco smiling at her appreciatively but I didn't let it hurt me. Or at least I tried not to let it hurt me. After all, I was with him too. And he'd glanced at me too before I got in the tub. It was all just so confusing because he wanted us both. And we wanted him. And now we were all wet in a hot tub together. And very, very drunk. I should have known it was a bad idea. But I wasn't going to say anything. Nuh-uh. It wasn't my job to tell everyone badness was gonna happen, because it really was out of my control. There should never have been a hot tub in the room in the first place. But at first things were good. I'm getting ahead of myself here. I just knew things weren't going to stay innocent and good like they started out. But first we did a truth or dare session because Hermione insisted.

"Draco you go first," she told him. "Truth or dare?"

"Truth," he said unafraid of what she'd ask him as we had no real secrets anymore.

"How old were you the first time you had sex?" she wondered mischievously.

"That's easy. I was fifteen."

"Fifteen? With who?" she wondered.

"That's two questions," he laughed at her.

"But I'm curious! Who was it?"

"I know who it was," I piped up with a snicker. I did in fact know the answer to this simply by default. Draco only ever dated one girl in school. "Pansy Parkinson," I proclaimed.

"How the fuck did you know that?" Draco asked with amusement.

"Because. I watched you intently for the entirety of the school years and she's the only girl you ever went out with. It had to be her," I said surely.

"Why were you watching me so fucking intently huh?" he asked me pointedly.

"Don't ask. Mostly because I thought you were evil."

"Evil? Was I evil? I mean, I did some bad things, but is that considered evil?" Draco wondered.

"I don't know. I thought you were a cockroach though," Hermione chuckled to herself.

"Right, right. I know. Foul evil loathsome cockroach, I believe was what you said to me. I might be wrong," he laughed right back at her.

"Sounds about right."

"Okay, my turn. Someone hit me with a dare." I said trying to get some attention focused on me.

Draco turned to me and smirked.

"I dare you to take off your boxers and throw them across the room."

"You'd like that wouldn't you?" I teased him.

"I might?" he wagged his eyebrows at me.

"Fine."

I took off my boxers and threw them across the room and I had to admit it felt kind of nice to be in a hot tub naked. Even if I was the only one at this point.

But I wouldn't be for long.

"Hermione's turn. Do you want a truth or a dare?" Draco asked her.

"Truth."

It was my turn to ask her and I wanted to go easy on her so I tried to think of something non-embarrassing to ask her.

"Who was your first crush?" I asked her finally. I thought she'd say Ron but she surprised me by saying something totally out of left field.

"Professor Lockhart."

We all burst out laughing in the hot tub and she was looking at us like we were mean.

"Stop laughing! It's not funny. He was dreamy!" she said with her own laughter.

"You crushed on that ponce?" Draco was disbelieving.

"I couldn't help it! He was so handsome. I just wish he wasn't a fraud. That made him so much less appealing."

"God you have tragic taste in men, Hermione," I told her with a chuckle.

"Shut up. I love you don't I?" she stuck out her tongue at me.

"Yeah, and I'm gay. So that's pretty tragic," I pointed out.

"Alright fine. So maybe it's a little tragic, but not always. I had some good men in my life," she insisted. "It's my turn again to ask Draco for a truth or dare."

"Dare."

"Ooh, shit is getting serious now," I laughed because I was very drunk and this was very funny to me. But I was about to not be the only naked person in the hot tub.

"Take off your drawers and throw them across the room," she smirked right at him.

"Happily," he said as he peeled them off and tossed them aside.

We kept going around and asking silly questions and doing stupid dares and eventually Hermione lost her bra. Then it came time for me to ask Draco a truth and I just had to ask him again about his fucking feet. I swear I'm not a foot fetish person, but his foot kept rubbing up against mine under the water and his feet were so damn smooth. So I looked at him and asked him if he got pedicures.

"What?" he laughed at me and shook his head.

"You have to answer truthfully!" I reminded him.

"No I do not get pedicures. I've never had a pedicure in all my life. I take care of my own feet," he insisted.

"Really? Because you do have nice feet. I noticed when you were rubbing against my leg with your foot how smooth it was," Hermione piped up and that's when I realized he was playing footsie with both of us under that water. I don't know why that upset me given the circumstances but it did a little.

I frowned at him.

"I think you're lying," I said.

"Nope. Why do you give a fuck about my feet anyway?" he chuckled.

"I don't. They're just nice is all. Much nicer than mine."

"Hell they're nicer than mine and I spend a fortune getting my feet polished to perfection every two weeks," Hermione giggled.

"You two lot are weird. Foot freaks. I've never even looked at either of your feet yet you guys are complimenting mine?" he shook his head and laughed heartily.

This just caused all of us to bring our feet out of the water and make a little pyramid with them and my feet were by far the ugliest and hairiest. I think that's because Draco's hair is white blonde and Hermione probably shaves any girlish hair she might have. I looked like a Hobbit compared to them and I verbalized this which caused everyone else to burst into laughter and start calling me Bilbo Baggins. And Hermione admitted that the Lord of the Rings was one of her favorite book series. We got a little off topic with that for a while until Draco decided he'd heard enough and called her a nerd.

"I'm not a nerd! I just like to read a lot," she protested.

"I like nerds," Draco shrugged. "Didn't I tell you Harry that I liked nerdy girls?"

"Uh, you said you liked smart girls. Is that the same thing?"

"Nerdy, smart, whatever. I like it. I wasn't insulting you," he insisted.

"You weren't?" she asked hopefully.

"No. I think you're marvelous. I like that you're nerdy and bookish. I kind of am too honestly. I read that series as a child and loved it too."

"Really? What's your favorite part?"

They sat and talked about Lord of the Rings for way longer than I wanted them to. I'd never read it, but I did see part of one of the movies on the telly. Mostly it was just a lot of walking around and talking. I was feeling left out so I reached under the water and poked Draco's side. I intended to tickle him and make him laugh and forget all about Lord of the Rings. But mostly I just hurt him a little and he gave me a look.

"Am I not paying enough attention to you, Harry?" he asked with a smirk.

"Not really. I don't know anything about this book series other than to know my feet look like Hobbit feet. But I'd rather none of you remember that about me," I admitted.

"You need me to pay a little attention to you? You need a kiss?" he asked in a sing-song voice trying to make fun of me.

But I just let him do it and I nodded my head and said yes please. And he delivered. I didn't think he would. Not with a naked Hermione sitting right across from him. But he planted his lips on mine and our tongues mingled for a glorious few moments before he pulled back and smiled at me. Then Hermione jumped into my arms and kissed me too before I knew what was going on. I think she was not only very drunk but afraid I was feeling left out. But before I could even process her kiss, Draco had grabbed her off of me and kissed her long and deep while I just watched. His hands were on her naked and wet breasts and I felt myself get excited even though I was watching my love and my best friend making out. It was a confusing boner, especially since they'd both kissed me. But I decided to join in the fun. I didn't want to watch anymore. So I kissed my way down Draco's neck and nibbled the skin between his neck and shoulder. He reached around and grabbed my ass with one hand, while his other hand stayed on Hermione's breast. That's when I realized that things were going to get bad. And out of hand. They already were. We were crossing so many lines, I wasn't even sure we'd drawn any at this point. The lines were nothing but a dot to us. And a dot never stopped anyone from doing what felt right and good in the moment. We all took turns making out with each other and groping one another, although I didn't grope Hermione until she grabbed my free hand and placed it on her breast. I wasn't sure what to do with it, but it felt kind of nice in my hand. It was all warm and wet and I could feel her stiff peak against my hand. But why was she doing this? She knew I was gay. But I don't think that factored into anything anymore because we were all kissing and touching and everything after that was a blur.

The next thing I knew we'd gotten towels and dried off and stumbled to the bed where we continued our lust fest. Draco was on top of Hermione who still had her knickers on but they were wet and not holding much back. I was caressing Draco's ass and kissing his back and he just reached around and grabbed my erection and began wanking me off a little. I was in heaven. Sweet bliss of heaven. Except my best friend was lying there naked too and Draco had his mouth on her breasts now, while he worked me over from behind. I wanted so badly to scoot Hermione off the bed and just have Draco to myself, but I knew that wasn't happening. A threesome was happening. The very thing we'd all laughed about when were first got there. We swore we'd never do it, and yet here we were. Doing it. And doing it mighty well, I have to say. No one seemed to feel left out and Draco got the best of both worlds. The only thing that confused me was when Hermione would initiate something sexual with me but I guess maybe she'd waited a long time to be with me that way and was taking whatever she could get. And I wasn't stopping her. I should have stopped her. I really should have. She was drunk. But so was I. And that's why I say all of this was bad. It was both amazing and bad. And so, so confusing. When it was all over we all just laid there naked together in a heap. Draco had gotten Hermione off with his fingers and he got me off with his other hand. And I got him off with Hermione helping me along. No actual intercourse took place, but that didn't seem to matter. We were a tangled mess of limbs and confusion and drunken lust. No one even knew what to say.

It's amazing how when you're in the act of fucking around, you lose all sense of reason and right and wrong. You just do whatever feels good in the moment, but when it's all done, you sometimes regret your actions. And I regretted mine. With Hermione. I didn't want to mess up our friendship by sending her confusing signals like she was sending me. But I just chalked it up to a hypersexual moment on all our parts and I tried not to hate myself too much. But it was safe to say that I'd seen Hermione naked up close and personal this time. I even touched her breasts. But it was still Draco I lusted for. I couldn't help it. Hermione was the best person in the world. I just didn't get off on her the way I did with Draco. I wished I could change myself sometimes to be what she wanted. Because we both knew we were losing Draco and all that would be left would be us. And now I feared that was going to be weird now. And I couldn't have that be weird. It was me who got myself up off the bed first and went into the bathroom without saying a word to anyone. The two of them were still cuddled up and I just looked in the mirror and wondered what the fuck I'd just done. But soon Draco joined me in the bathroom and didn't even knock. I guess we had no secrets from each other now. He just proceeded to take a piss next to me, but he didn't say a word.

When we got back into the bedroom Hermione was dressed in her nightgown and robe and sitting in a chair facing the window. Again, none of us spoke. Draco and I just got dressed in pajamas and tried not to look at each other. Everything had changed now. It was awkward and weird. And I really didn't want it to be awkward and weird. But I think we were all coming down from our drunken buzz and the sexual tension that had always been such a huge part of our relationships and now no one knew what to say. I finally went to Hermione in the chair and put my hand on her shoulder.

"Are you alright?" I asked her softly.

She nodded and smiled up at me.

"I'm fine Harry. That was just a bit wild for me. I'm rather embarrassed," she admitted with a slight cringe.

"Don't be embarrassed with me. It's okay. All of it. I don't want this to change things," I told her.

"It already has changed things. We had a _threesome_. Together! God, what was I thinking?" she held her face in her hands.

I knelt down in front of her and held her hands.

"I love you, Hermione. And Draco loves you too. You didn't do anything wrong."

And I wanted to tell myself the same thing because I had to believe what we did wasn't wrong.

"Why do I feel so dirty now then?" she asked me with tears forming in her eyes.

"Don't feel that way. It wasn't dirty. It was love. You love Draco right?" I asked her quietly.

She nodded her head.

"I've tried not to but I do. I do love him," she admitted.

"I love him too. And I guess maybe this was just inevitable."

"Inevitable? I could have stopped this. But I didn't. I didn't want to," she whispered. "I was finally having both of you, whom I love so much."

I realized in that moment that Hermione was in love with two people as well. Me and Draco. Is this really what our life had become? Before I could ponder it further or say anything else to her, Draco came up behind us. He put his hands on her shoulders and leaned down and kissed her cheek.

"I love you, Hermione. I always will. No matter what happens," he whispered to her, and it broke my heart to hear. But then he looked up at me and kissed my cheek too. "I love you too, Harry. And nothing will change that."

I just stood there while Hermione let tears fall from her eyes and Draco stood there staring at both of us. I felt like I wasn't part of the 'I love two hopeless people' club, but I was still hopeless. I loved both of them too. I loved Hermione like a sister and I loved Draco like no one else in the world. I guess it really was possible to love two people at the same time. Even if my love for Hermione was different than the love I held for Draco. It was still love. And it was still all consuming. Because I had to have her not upset with me for anything that transpired. But I'd already said my peace and there didn't seem to be more to say. We all finally drifted back to the bed and climbed in with Draco in the middle. We both cuddled up to him and I held Hermione's hand over his stomach. That's how we fell asleep. And I felt like maybe, just maybe we'd survive this badly contrived lovemaking session. Something I never dreamed I'd witness outside of a porno. But this was my life. And it really happened. And I had to find a way to live with it. I just hoped everyone else could as well.

 **To be continued….Please leave some feedback for this story! I'm hoping you all are enjoying this twisted love story.**


	13. Chapter 13

**Disclaimer:** I own none of the characters here. JK Rowling and company own them. I merely play with them for my own amusement. Please don't sue. I have nothing of value anyway.

 **Summary:** Harry is caught in a love triangle to rival all else. He's found himself questioning his sexuality and is owning up to his attraction to Draco Malfoy. Meanwhile Draco is cozying up to Hermione, who won't give him the time of day. And Hermione keeps thinking there's hope for her and Harry to have a future together. It's a tangled web of emotions and will anyone get what they want? Set a couple of years after Hogwarts ended. Told from Harry's POV. Drarry, with undertones of Dramione.

 **Three is a Crowd**

After our crazy threesome, we still had one whole day and night left at the ski lodge. I wondered what would happen next or if we'd do it again. But I didn't verbalize my curiosity. Everyone else seemed so quiet, so I was quiet as well. When we woke up the next morning after our lust fest, we were all tangled up together with Draco in the middle. He was spooning Hermione and I was spooning him. And if this was an acceptable way to live your life and not at all hedonistic and wrong, I'd be a pretty happy man. I mean, I wanted Draco all to myself, that's true. But sharing him with my best friend felt less bad than it would be to share him with a wife I didn't even know. I wasn't looking forward to that. But it wasn't happening yet and I was determined that even if nothing happened again, we still make the most of this trip together. When everyone else opened their eyes, none of us made a move to get up immediately. I think they were basking in this afterglow just like I was. But it was still entirely too quiet. It's like words just left the room completely. But finally I could handle it no more and I spoke.

"Good morning," I said to both of them.

They grumbled a good morning back to me, but Draco just held his head and so did Hermione. They had hangovers. And I didn't which is an amazing feat considering how much alcohol I consumed. But I think I may have had slightly less than they did. Or else I was just powering right on through the hangover and didn't even notice it. But I sure hoped everyone remembered what happened. I didn't want to begin to explain it.

"What did we do last night?" Hermione asked me finally as she scooted away from Draco slightly and sat up.

"You don't remember?" Please don't make me explain it. I just said I didn't want to explain it. Only that was in my head and I didn't actually verbalize it.

"No I remember. I just don't know what the hell I was thinking," she admitted as she reached for her robe and pulled it on over her nightgown. She went to make coffee with the little coffee pot in the room.

"We could order room service for that. That coffee is gonna taste like shit," Draco informed her as he stretched like a cat and sat up next to me in the bed.

"It'll do for now. But feel free to order room service if you're hungry. I'm feeling a bit queasy myself," Hermione told him, not looking at him but continuing to prepare the coffee.

"I could use something to eat," I chimed in, thinking room service actually sounded good.

Draco reached over to the nightstand and handed me the menu.

"Order something good for all of us. Hermione needs to eat even if she doesn't want to," he told me with a small smile.

I just nodded and perused the menu while I noticed that Draco got out of bed and went to Hermione. He whispered something to her that I couldn't hear and put his hands on her shoulders. She looked somber at first, but then she broke into a smile and leaned up to kiss him on the mouth. I didn't really like witnessing this moment and I knew they thought I was nose deep in a menu at the time. But whatever he said to her seemed to perk her up. She didn't look as forlorn as she did when she first woke up. And that made me feel better. I didn't want Hermione to be upset with herself. We all were guilty of partaking in the madness. She shouldn't feel bad just because she was the only girl in attendance. It didn't make her a bad person to love two people. It didn't make either of them bad people. But I got a sense that they both felt like bad people because they wouldn't look at me straight in the eyes, even after I ordered our meal. I went up to them as they both stood at the window with their arms around each other and I informed them I'd ordered the meal.

"Good. Thanks Potter," Draco said, never taking his eyes off the snow falling outside.

"Yeah thanks Harry," Hermione said, fixated on the snow.

"So are we gonna go skiing some more today or is it too snowy outside?" I asked, trying to get one of them at least to look at me and say something more to me.

Hermione shrugged and Draco just sighed. Then he looked at the slopes with a few early birds making their way up the mountain. They hadn't closed the lifts, but if the snow got to blizzard conditions they would. I didn't really want to ski anymore truth be told, but I knew they did. Or at least they should want to. But no one really answered me and that was no good.

"Come on you guys. You're acting like someone died. Will someone please talk to me?" I asked finally, unwilling to stare at the back of their heads as they both gazed out the window at the snow.

That snapped Hermione out of her reverie and she looked over her shoulder at me.

"I'm sorry Harry. It's just the snow was so pretty I kind of got lost in thought. But yes, I think we should ski some more. At least until they close the lifts down. It's pretty wild out there. It's coming down in sheets," she said, trying to be utterly ordinary, like nothing happened. And I liked that.

"Are you up for more skiing, Draco?" I asked him as he was still silent.

"Yeah, sure. Of course. That's why we're here, isn't it?" he said giving me a small smile.

"I'm going to take a shower," Hermione said quickly as she exited the room and slammed the bathroom door. I just looked at Draco and wondered what was going on in his pretty mind.

"You're so quiet, Draco. It's not like you," I noticed as I reached over and touched his arm.

"I'm sorry, Harry. I don't mean to be quiet. I wanna tell you the same thing I told Hermione," he said, grabbing my shoulders and looking me in the eye. "Last night didn't make me think differently of either one of you. I know it was wild, but I love you both. I hope that we can all still be friends."

"Friends? Of course. We'll always be friends. But it's so much more than that now. It always has been. Don't you want it to happen again?" I wondered aloud.

Draco laughed slightly.

"Harry, it can't happen again. It's too confusing. I'm not sorry it happened though. I just think it's best if we all keep our clothes on. After all, this wasn't in our friendship agreement," he pointed out.

"Right. I know. It really wasn't. But I guess I just thought you liked it a lot. I mean, two people fawning over you. What's not to love?" I noted.

"It was amazing. And I'll never forget it. But some things are best not repeated. It'd feel forced. And I don't want to force it. Last night just evolved naturally. But let's try and tone it down a bit. No more getting naked in the hot tub," he chuckled slightly.

"Alright. If that's the way you want it…"

I was deflated slightly because even if I didn't really wish to have another threesome, I wasn't keen on never being with him again like that. But now he wanted to be friends again. How could you be just friends again after what we shared? But then I realized we had to be. There had to be a way. Because Hermione and I were always just friends and we couldn't lose that because of what happened. Being friends was the only option. Friends who had quasi fucked before. That's all. I mean, no one really fucked exactly but there was much debauchery going on. It was just the same as fucking really. Although I still remained a virgin technically, which was sad. I might be the only living virgin who's had a threesome and kept his virtue intact. A hand job doesn't count as losing your V-card. I wish it did. But at least I had some experience now. More than I had before. I'd given a blow job before and now I'd been wanked off by another person. That was something. Maybe something fifteen year olds had under their belt, but it was something at least.

When Hermione got out of the bathroom her hair was all wet and wrapped in a towel turban. She had on her robe and rooted through her suitcase for her clothes. She didn't speak, but I decided to go over to her to make sure we were okay for real.

"Hey, you alright?" I asked her quietly.

"I'm fine Harry. Really. I was just a little embarrassed earlier but I'll live. After all, it takes three to tango. At least in our case," she added with a small smile.

"Yeah, I guess it's usually two but I don't regret anything," I told her seriously.

"I don't either."

"Good."

"Good."

"So then we're still best friends?" I had to know.

"Harry, of course we are. We always will be. No matter what," she assured me with a kiss to the cheek. Then she grabbed her clothes and went back into the bathroom, while I just waited for the food in my pajamas. I'd get dressed later.

When the room service arrived, Draco took over and paid the tip before I could even get money out. They laid the food out on the table and even though I felt nervous still about everything, I was really hungry. So we all sat down together and dug into the breakfast feast. But it was still eerily quiet. Normally Draco was a chatterbox who was always making jokes and Hermione and I would inevitably join in and laugh. But this morning it was all business. Just eating and drinking and no real talk at all. Then we got dressed to ski again, which I kind of hated because I had a feeling I really might die trying to ski in a near blizzard. But for them, I'd make the sacrifice. But after two runs down the mountain, where I crashed spectacularly into a huge snow bank and almost hit my head on a rock, I called it quits. I just waited down at the bottom for them to ski down and they both seemed to lighten up a lot with the activity. They were both smiling and happy and I was happy then too. That's all I wanted was for them to be happy. But after a bit, the snow got really bad. You couldn't even see in front of you, so they closed down the lifts and everyone retreated indoors, except for us and some stray families in the kids area. They hadn't stopped the sledding and such. So we went over there and proceeded to grab a sled from the shack and walk up the little hill and we'd slide down. It was way more fun to me than skiing was. And we tipped over into the snow at the bottom and landed in a heap on top of each other. It was great.

Then we had a snowball fight, which really lightened things up. Hermione was giggling her head off because she kept pelting both of us in the face. I figured we were going to catch our deaths out there, but oh well. I wanted to see her happy and laughing. And so did Draco, I think. He was overcome with joy at watching her pummel us and told me how he felt.

"She's so pretty when she's laughing," he told me with a grin.

"Yeah? She is. You're right," I agreed, even though it sort of pained me that he was looking at her with such love.

If I didn't know it already, I would have known for sure now, that he'd pick Hermione over me. If he had to choose; if we _made_ him choose, I would be the loser. I think in cases where you love two people, you always love one of them more. I heard someone say once that if you love two people, pick the second one because if you loved the first one enough, you'd never have fallen for anyone else. And he loved me first, and her second. And I could see now with perfect clarity that the two of them were probably meant to be together. I was the interloper. And it stung. But I also knew that they'd never be together. Not really. And I expected that to make me happier, but it didn't. It just made me sad for both of them. I'd graduated beyond my petty jealousies and was just sad for them. Life didn't seem fair at all. And it really wasn't. Especially because I loved Draco with all my heart and he only loved me first and not second. Therefore that meant I was the one he grew out of love with as he tumbled into Hermione's arms. It was a bitter pill to swallow. But I did it. And I was determined to have as much fun as possible still. They were both my friends and I wanted to keep it that way. I couldn't lose either one of them.

After we'd exhausted ourselves with the snowball fight and were all wet and freezing, we went back into the lodge. We went upstairs and all got changed into drier and warmer clothes. Then we decided to go the restaurant again and sit in the bar. It wasn't time to have supper yet, but it was a good time to drink. Any time was a good time to drink these days. And Draco was really knocking them back. But things weren't silent anymore, which made me relieved.

"So will you two come to my wedding, whenever it may be?" he asked, already feeling the effects of the whiskey he was chugging.

"Of course. If we're invited," Hermione added with a small voice.

"Don't be silly. Of course you're invited. I don't much care what my father thinks of it. You're my boss technically so it wouldn't be so strange to have you there," he told her.

"Yeah, I am your boss. Which is weird, granted. But I just didn't know if I'd be welcomed in the situation because of my background," she admitted.

"Bollocks. My father can't stop me from inviting my friends," Draco assured her. Then he looked at me. "Potter, you coming too?"

"Obviously. I wouldn't miss it."

"Good. That's what I needed to hear. Maybe I'll get through it all if you guys are there," he said somberly.

"Hey let's not talk about the wedding. You're not even engaged yet. Let's talk about something else," I prodded him.

"Like what?"

"I don't know. How about my spectacularly awful skiing. Did you see me almost hit that rock on the way down?" I laughed slightly.

"I did not see that. Thankfully. I would have worried for you," he told me. "You really are a hopeless skier."

"I never learned as a child like you two did. My aunt and uncle never would consent to taking us skiing."

"My parents took us every year just about. It was the best," Hermione smiled.

"My folks liked to take us too. But we spent most of our summers in France before all the weird shit happened anyway. I speak fluent French," he confessed.

I'd heard him talking to the hotel staff in French and was impressed by it. But I didn't realize he was fluent.

"That's pretty cool. I only ever knew how to speak Parseltongue," I laughed slightly.

"But that was awesome! God, don't you miss being able to do that?" Draco asked.

"Not really. I don't come across many snakes these days. Which is a blessing because I've grown to hate them," I admitted.

"I always thought it was sort of weird that you could do that. Cool, but weird," Hermione chimed in.

"Well it wasn't really my gift so much as Voldemort's gift. Once he was out of my head it went away. I tried doing it but it was just gibberish."

"That must have been freaky to have a piece of Voldemort in your head. I had him in my house and that was close enough for my comfort," Draco said with a shake of his head.

"I never wanted him in there! I didn't even know he was there until a long time had passed. That's when I realized I had to die," I said softly.

"But you didn't die," Draco pointed out.

"No, I did. I just didn't stay dead. It's complicated. I never really talk about what happened to anyone. It sounds so unbelievable when I say it."

"What did happen exactly? I know you just said you didn't want to talk about it, but I'm highly curious," Draco said, as he ordered up another drink.

"Well I died and went someplace. It looked like Kings Cross. And Dumbledore was there. We talked. It was really strange and I kept asking him if it was all in my head, like a dream, but it said it was still real. So I don't know. Maybe that's what it's like to die. You just sort of wake up in a strange place and a dead friend greets you?" I offered unsure of the whole thing myself.

"That's so weird. You're right. It does seem unbelievable. But if that's what it's like to die, then it doesn't seem so bad," he shrugged.

"I guess not. I just wish that I got to meet my parents there instead. I mean, I saw them with the resurrection stone, but I would have liked to have seen them wherever it was I went."

"You'll meet them someday," Hermione touched my arm.

"Yeah, I know. I'm not ready to meet them yet though. I've still got a lot of living to do," I told them both.

And it was true. I was just twenty one and had my whole life ahead of me. And I realized with some sadness that things were going to change. The way things were now were only temporary. I knew how easily you could lose a friend, like I had in Ron. And I knew that one day all of this with Draco and Hermione would be nothing but an old photo in my mind. It wouldn't last. And it wouldn't be real anymore. It would be a memory. And I tried not to get choked up at the thought of that. I wanted to just live in the now. I didn't want to be a sad story. For once, it was me who grew quiet and the two of them were looking at me expectantly to say something else. But I had nothing else to offer. So I just ordered another drink and wanted to numb my brain. I'd made myself sad. And neither one of them could really fix it.

Once we'd grown tired of drinking, we went back to the room. I'd like to say that nothing was awkward, but it still felt that way to me. Especially knowing that Draco and Hermione were really in love. And that I was going to have to be the strong one when all this shit went down. Hermione was going to need me, and I was going to need her. But I had a feeling I would focus all my energy onto her being okay and not me. I never really had a shot anyway. Not really. But I still loved Draco and wanted to enjoy my time with him. It just felt like there was a dark cloud hanging over us. I never wanted the weekend to end, but at the same time, I was ready to go home. I just wanted to wallow in my misery alone. But they still wanted to have fun. So I tried really hard. Hermione brought her playing cards with her and we tried our hand at poker again. Then we ordered more room service and fed each other hot fudge sundaes while drinking a pricey bottle of champagne. It didn't sound like it went together but it did. And I kept my morose thoughts to myself and just enjoyed their company. When it came time for bed, we all cuddled in the bed again. This time I scooted a little bit away from Draco and let Hermione have him. But he grabbed my hand and held it tightly and I let him. It was like he knew he was losing me too and didn't want to let go. We drifted off to sleep like that and I had no idea what the future was going to hold.

When we made our way home, Draco left Hermione and I alone at our house and he claimed that he needed to buck it up and see his father again. He didn't want him actually sending healers to his door and he knew there were likely several messages waiting for him by owl at his flat. So we said goodbye to him, and he kissed us both. Then I turned to Hermione who just burst into tears. She couldn't hold it back any longer. And neither could I. I admit I got teary myself and we just held each other tightly and cried on the couch together. It was a bonding experience.

"I wish I didn't love him," she sniffled into my shoulder.

"I wish I didn't either," I admitted as I wiped my eyes.

"How did this happen?" she wondered aloud.

But I had no real answer for her. It just happened. But I smoothed the hair out of her face and kissed her tear stained cheek.

"At least we'll always have each other," I pointed out.

"I'm grateful for that Harry. I'd be lost without you," she said tearfully.

"You'll never lose me," I said and I hoped that I meant it. I didn't want to think about what life would be like without her by my side.

But I knew life threw in curveballs. Sometimes you didn't stay friends forever with some people. And eventually it was all going to change. But I didn't let myself think of that now. She needed me. And I was there for her. I just held her all night and we absently watched the telly together with neither of saying a word, but we held hands and fed each other popcorn mindlessly. There was nothing to say, and so much to say all at once that we just fell silent. We both were lost in our own thoughts. But at least we had each other. And we were both wondering how Draco was faring and what was transpiring in his life. It was amazing how we could be so intertwined yet totally alone with all of this. In the end though, I guess we were always alone in our own personal hells. I just hoped that we could hold onto each other somewhat and never let go. I didn't want things to change. But I knew they would anyway. I was helpless to stop time from passing. But I was determined to try and make the most of what we had left.

 **To be continued….Please leave some feedback for this story! I'm hoping you all are enjoying this twisted love story.**


	14. Chapter 14

**Disclaimer:** I own none of the characters here. JK Rowling and company own them. I merely play with them for my own amusement. Please don't sue. I have nothing of value anyway.

 **Summary:** Harry is caught in a love triangle to rival all else. He's found himself questioning his sexuality and is owning up to his attraction to Draco Malfoy. Meanwhile Draco is cozying up to Hermione, who won't give him the time of day. And Hermione keeps thinking there's hope for her and Harry to have a future together. It's a tangled web of emotions and will anyone get what they want? Set a couple of years after Hogwarts ended. Told from Harry's POV. Drarry, with undertones of Dramione.

 **Three is a Crowd**

Some time passed and much to our dismay, Draco didn't spend near as much time with either of us as he used to. He was being forced to court Astoria, which meant his free time was spent taking her on dates, of which he'd tell us later were really awkward and strange. But she seemed nice enough, he'd said. But she wasn't us. And that made the whole thing suck. We did still see each other at work, of course. But lunch times went way too fast for me, and Hermione saw him more than I did. I swore I was done being jealous of her, but I was a little. Because she got to see him during her work day while I was off gallivanting around doing Auror missions. Sometimes I didn't even have lunch with them because I was gone. It was a professional milestone for me to be going out on missions as the lead Auror, but a personal crisis because I really wanted to stay at the Ministry and see Draco at lunch. But today I was in the office for lunch and we met up with Draco in the cafeteria. We all sat down with our trays of food and I was pleased we were all together again.

"So how has your day been?" I asked both of them.

"Fine," Hermione said digging into her salad.

"It's been alright," Draco shrugged, picking at his sandwich. "How about you?"

"My day has been okay. I had a quick mission this morning but it wasn't very difficult thankfully. I was afraid I'd miss you guys again at lunch," I admitted.

"I'm glad you made it. I've missed you, Potter," Draco said with a smile.

"I missed you too. Do you think you'll ever have time to hang out again with us? Or with me specifically? I'd kind of like to go out with you again like we used to do," I confessed looking away from him.

"How about tonight? Just us guys? We can go into the city again," he said giving me a grin.

"Really? You're not busy with what's her name?" I knew her name, I just didn't want to say it.

"Nope. Not tonight. She's got some sort of bridge game," Draco informed me.

"Bridge? Is she a hundred. No one young plays bridge," Hermione said snidely, chiming into the conversation.

"She's eighteen. But he grandparents make her play with them. She says she likes it," Draco shrugged.

"Well as long as you're free to hang with me, I'm happy. It's been way too long," I said with a smile.

"It has been too long," he agreed with me. "You don't feel left out, do you love?" he asked Hermione.

"No, it's fine. You two should spend some guy time together. I'll just stay home and read."

"You could come," I offered, even though I really wanted Draco to myself for once. And she got to see him way more than I did. But I wanted to be nice.

"No, really. It's okay. I'll be fine," she said waving her hand in the air. I think she knew how much it meant to me to have this time with Draco. And I mentally thanked her for that.

When evening came, I waited around the house like a kid waiting for Santa. It seemed to take forever for Draco to get there, but he finally arrived. He was polished to perfection again, and I hoped I looked good in my newest suit. It wasn't the silk one, but the other one I'd purchased after the bathtub debacle. He looked at me and smiled.

"You look handsome, Harry. I bet you'll gain some attention tonight," he said surely.

The only attention I wanted to gain was his. But I didn't say it. He already knew it deep down. But we apparated away from my house and into an alley at a night club I remembered. It was the place he'd first taken me to. The gay club. I rather thought we'd go back to The Red Room and not Demigods. But he smiled and said he felt like being in the company of men tonight. He'd listened to far too many stories about knitting and shoe shopping to last him a lifetime. Apparently Astoria was boring to him, even if she was nice enough. He wanted to spend some actual guy time with me. Of course he kept hinting that I looked so good tonight I might get lucky for real. But that was the furthest thing from my mind. He was the only thing on my mind.

We got let inside again quickly, and we headed to the bar. He looked at the crowd appreciatively and kept pointing out blokes for me to ogle. I know he meant well and was just trying to prepare me better for a life without him, but I kept telling him I wasn't interested. I just wanted to dance with him. Like we did before. Only this time there wouldn't be any girls to jump into the fray. We downed our first drinks and went to the dancefloor. We started dancing together and again I wasn't sure I was pulling it off, but Draco never said I looked stupid. He just held onto me and grinded against me and I could feel his erection through his trousers. He was definitely in the mood for guy time. And I always was. So I grinded right back on him and we really made quite the spectacle of ourselves. But we fit right in. Everyone was dancing this way, but I don't think anyone else looked as good as we did doing it. That's mainly because Draco was the most attractive man in the bar. At least in my eyes. But I think he was in a lot of other people's eyes too. But he was mine. Sort of. I guess he wasn't really, but for the night he was mine. And I held his arm possessively as we walked off the floor and sat back down at the bar.

"So can I kiss you tonight?" I asked somewhat dreamily, having missed his lips.

He chuckled and shook his head.

"Potter, we're not supposed to kiss anymore, remember?" he scolded me.

"But it never stopped us before," I reminded him.

"True. Maybe just one kiss," he relented as he leaned over to me and planted his lips on mine. There were no spies watching us in this establishment and since it was a gay bar, we didn't even warrant any stares from anyone. But it was over way too quickly for my taste.

"That's all you've got?" I teased him playfully.

"I'm already breaking rules. Don't make me break them even more," he laughed.

"Do you kiss Hermione at work?" I blurted out just out of my insane curiosity and jealousy that crept up.

"What? At work? No. Are you mad? I've told you my father has spies watching me there. Besides, it would be pretty scandalous to just stick my tongue in my supervisors mouth. I might get fired."

"I hadn't considered that. I just wondered," I sighed.

"Don't hurt yourself wondering. Hermione and I haven't kissed since the skiing trip. She said she doesn't want to kiss me anymore now that I'm officially dating Astoria. She doesn't want to be 'that' sort of girl. Which is really stupid honestly. I don't even have feelings for Astoria! But I suppose I see her point. I am to marry her," he lamented.

"I didn't realize she'd shut you down. I just assumed that when I was gone, you two were all cozy and lovey together," I confessed.

"You have some imagination, Potter. Of course we don't act all lovey at work. You worry yourself silly over nothing," he scolded me.

It was true. I did have quite the imagination. And I just assumed they were always playing footsie under their desks and sneaking into broom cupboards to paw each other and make out. But apparently that was a misguided thought. I never asked Hermione what happened without me there because I was afraid to know. I didn't realize she put the brakes on because of Draco's girlfriend. I was less of a person I think because I wasn't letting it stop me from wanting him to kiss me. I didn't care about a girl I didn't even know. But I wondered if I ever would know her. So I asked Draco this.

"Am I ever gonna meet your wife to be? Or do I have to wait for the wedding to see her?" I asked above the din of the music.

Draco sighed and ran his hands through his hair.

"I suppose you could meet her if you wanted to. I didn't imagine you'd want to meet her," he reckoned.

"I don't really, but I'm also insanely curious about her. Is she pretty? Is she stuffy? Is she boring? What does she look like?" I rattled off all my ponderings to him and made him laugh.

"She's pretty, yeah. And she's not stuffy or anything, but she is a little vacuous. Not smart enough for me, but not an imbecile. I just sense that she's been taught to cater to a man's needs and to make him feel important without her having a mind of her own. It's kind of sad," he admitted.

"That is sad. Is she blonde?"

"No, she has dark hair. She's tall and very polished. She seems so young to me though, even if she's only a couple years younger than us."

"Is she excited to marry you?"

"I don't know honestly. I didn't ask her. But she's always pleasant when we go out. I can't complain. But she's not you. And she's not Hermione. That's the biggest thing wrong with her," he sighed unhappily.

I didn't quite know what to say to that. It was true. However pleasant she was, she'd never be us. And we had a twisted triangle of love that trumped anything else. I knew it and he knew it. But Astoria didn't know it and never would. She'd marry this man thinking she only held his heart, when his heart was splintered into pieces scattered amongst two people she didn't even know yet. I felt kind of sorry for her. And for him. But in this moment, mostly her. Because she had no idea what she was getting into.

"Are you sure you still want to go through with this, Draco?" I asked getting a little drunk and my lips were looser.

"Go through with what? Our man date?" he asked confusedly.

"No," I shook my head. "I meant the marriage. You don't have to do it. There's still time to back out."

"No there isn't, Harry. I've told you before, I can't lose my trust fund. It's all set down," he said regretfully.

"If I were you I'd give it all up and be with the person I loved," I said honestly.

"Would you now? And who would I end up with if I did that?" he challenged me.

I wanted to say me because that was my fantasy. But my heart knew better than that. I looked down at my hands and answered his question.

"Hermione."

He just looked at me with some surprise that I'd not say my own name. And then he furrowed his brow and shook his head.

"What makes you think it wouldn't be you?" he asked softly, so that I could barely hear him above the music.

"Because when you love two people, you should pick the second one. Because if you really loved the first, you'd never fall for someone else," I reiterated the statement I'd heard of earlier.

He didn't say anything to that right away, but just signaled the barkeep for another drink. He took a sip and looked at me.

"I didn't realize you'd thought so much about this. And that you'd think I wouldn't pick you if I could," he said finally.

"I _want_ you to pick me, but I think I know who you really are in love with. Maybe you didn't know it, but I did. I could just tell. Plus like I just told you, if I was enough for you, you'd never have feelings for her. And I'm not enough. Or I'm not a proper person to love. I don't know. But I think you should be with Hermione. You two would be great together," I said selflessly. I had no real stake in this anymore. But I couldn't agree with him marrying someone he didn't love. It was just so empty.

Draco tipped his drink back and gulped it down. Then he took my hands in his own and held them tightly.

"In another life Harry, it would have been you. I promise you that," he said looking directly into my eyes.

I didn't know what to say but I wanted to cry. In _another_ life. A life that wasn't this one. _Then_ we could be together. I just squeezed his hands and held them to my chest.

"I'll wait for you. For that other life. I'll wait," I said pathetically, my heart so full of love for him.

"Harry don't wait for me. Move on with your life. Meet someone special. Fall in love. I want you happy. In _this_ life. Don't wait for another life to make you happy," he said somberly.

"But I don't want to move on," I said with tears in my eyes.

"I know, but you have to. We both have to."

"I love you Draco," I admitted with tears rolling down my face.

"I love you too Harry."

He leaned over and kissed my tears away and then ran his hand down the side of my face, cupping my cheek.

"I mean it though. Move on. Forget me. You'll find someone to love you properly."

But I didn't want anyone else but him. This seemed so final. It seemed like he was saying goodbye. And that's when I realized he _was_ saying goodbye. At least somewhat. He was letting go of all that we shared. All that we never got to share. He was letting me go. Only I didn't want to be let go. I wanted him to hold on. But he couldn't. He wouldn't. He just dropped his hand away from my face and went back to his drink and didn't look at me again for a long time. And I had no words to what he'd just said to me. I wanted beg him to love me and not to leave me and not get married to anyone and run away with me. Someplace where no one would know us. But I just stayed silent and let him let me go. There was nothing else I could do. Or at least I didn't think there was anything I could do. So I just hung my head down and tried not to keep crying. I couldn't stop really. But finally Draco wiped my eyes with his hand and held my face.

"Stop crying, Harry. I'm not dying. I'm getting married. You'll still see me. It just won't be quite like this anymore," he told me seriously.

"I can't stop crying. I don't want to let you go. I don't know if I can," I confessed barely above a whisper, but he was leaning so close to me he heard every word.

"You can. You're strong. Stronger than me. You're the great Harry Potter. The world is yours," he smiled at me.

"What world? There is no world without you in it with me," I said morosely.

"Like I said, I'm not dying. I'll still be around. I won't let you forget me, but that doesn't mean I don't want you to move on. I can be a pleasant memory for you," he tried to make me feel better.

"A pleasant memory? _That_ sounds like you're dying," I sighed.

"Nope, just stepping out of the picture a bit. That's all. I wish we could still be friends the same way, but let's face it Harry, we've never been friends. We fight and we grope and we kiss and we hate each other and then we love each other until we can't stand it anymore. But we're not _friends_. That's why it has to end."

I hated what he was saying to me, but he was right. We weren't friends. We never were. It was always something more. And before it was something more, it was hate. A thin line between love and hate, I guess. But that's where the passion comes from, isn't it? I guess part of me doesn't feel like I'd ever be happy with someone who didn't drive me crazy all the time. But we'd already tried the friend thing and were trying now and we just ended up kissing and declaring our love. And now I feared we were going to fight because I wouldn't accept his choice. But I didn't want to fight with him now, so I just nodded my head.

"I get it. You're right. We'll never be friends. I just wish we could be."

"I do too, but alas, here we are. And I really think I should be going now. I told Astoria I'd owl her when I got home tonight. She's probably waiting for me," he said, rising from the barstool and taking my hand and pulling me along.

I didn't want to go yet and I certainly didn't want him to go either, but his precious Astoria was waiting for his owl. I wished she'd just drop off the earth. I was jealous of Hermione too, but I was more jealous of the woman who got to claim Draco for the rest of his life. What did she ever do to deserve that honor except be born to the right family?

"Do we really have to leave?" I asked as we tumbled outside amidst the growing crowd of people and stood on the sidewalk.

"You can stay if you want, but I have to go," he said with a sigh.

"I don't want to be here without you."

"I'll see you home," he offered.

I held up my hand.

"No, that's okay. I can see myself home. You go get your owl. I'll see you around at work," I said admitting defeat.

"Alright. I'll see you later, Potter. Be good," he smiled at me and ruffled my hair. And then he strode away to the alley to apparate back to his house.

It was true I didn't want to stay there without him, but I also wasn't sure I wanted to go home either. I wanted to get really drunk. Like so drunk I didn't even remember my own name. That was the only way I could handle what was happening. So I went back inside the bar and I sat down and ordered up whiskey after whiskey until I could barely see straight and the bartender cut me off. Then I hobbled to a liquor store and pretended really hard that I wasn't already drunk and bought another bottle. The man behind the counter didn't seem to notice I was barely standing. He was too busy reading a book. He just rung me up and sent me on my way. So I sat down in an alley with my bottle like a common wino. I didn't have the strength to go home yet. After a time, I wasn't even sure I could stand much less apparate. I was very, very stupid. I needed help. I needed a taxi. But I didn't have enough Muggle cash left to pay for one. So I pulled out my mobile phone that I only ever used to call Hermione and I waited for her to answer. It didn't take long before she picked up and sounded worried about me.

"Harry, why are you calling me? Where are you?" she asked into the phone.

"I'm in some alley with a bottle of whiskey. I-I need help. I can't get home. I'm afraid to apparate to the wrong place or splinch myself."

"You're in an alley? What the hell? Draco left you drunk in an _alley_? I'll throttle him!" she groaned into the phone.

"It's not his fault. I wouldn't let him take me home. And I wasn't this drunk when he left. To go be with _her_. The bitch," I snarled into the phone.

"Alright, where exactly are you? I'll come get you," she said quickly.

I looked around for an address on one of the buildings and finally found a number.

"212 Baker Street. In the alley. Behind the dumpster. That's where you'll find me. I love you Hermione," I said quickly before I hung up on her accidentally. But I assumed she heard me and would show up.

She didn't arrive as quickly as I hoped, but she did finally make it there. She took one look at me sitting next to a pile of garbage with a bottle in my hands and she just knelt down and put my face in her hands.

"Harry, what have you gone and done? You're sitting with rubbish next to a bin. With a bottle in your hand! You look homeless," she scolded me.

"I know. Except this suit cost a lot of money. But I think I'm sitting in beer," I admitted trying to stand up and face her.

"Why did this happen? Because Draco went to see Astoria? I thought she was busy tonight?" Hermione mentioned.

"She _was_ busy, but I guess she was supposed to wait for Draco to owl her when he got home. I personally think he just ditched out on me on purpose. I exposed too many of my feelings and so did he. But it didn't matter because he doesn't want me. He wants her. He's going marry her. And I'll lose everything," I cried unhappily.

Now, a lot of this is fuzzy for me. I know I said that, but I don't really remember what Hermione said back to me. Or how we ended up back at home. But the next thing I knew I was puking in our bathroom with Hermione standing over me. I was embarrassed and crying and a total mess. She just got a cool cloth and put it on my head and sat down next to me and flushed the sick away. She's too good to me. I wish I could marry her. She'd be an excellent wife. But I'm gay and in love with someone else. But she's proved she loves me an awful lot to put up with this mess I caused. I kept crying about Draco I know, and she kept listening and I didn't even take into account that she was losing him too. I was being so selfish. But she never wavered and never left my side. When she put me to bed finally she undressed me and tucked me in and then laid down next to me and cuddled up to my back, spooning me. I remember what she said next.

"I love you Harry. I hate seeing you so sad. Draco isn't worth it. We can find better. Just drift away into dream land now okay?" she whispered to me softly.

I couldn't answer her because I was still choked up and I also passed out too fast. I don't think I ever said anything to her except maybe I snored. But when I woke up in the morning I felt like death. Like someone had killed me, reanimated my corpse and then killed me again. I've never, ever been that drunk in my life. I'm amazed I remember anything at all. But the shitty part is, I remember the parts I wanted to forget. And probably forgot the parts that were actually lovely with Hermione caring for me. I'm such a bad friend. I didn't even think of her feelings. I said I was going to be the strong one for her and yet I fell to pieces in front of her and needed her to rescue me from an alley. But she didn't waver in her devotion to me. She just told me she'd tell them I was sick and I should rest and not come to work. I protested weakly because I hated to miss work and would miss any chance I had to see Draco at all, but I literally couldn't get out of bed. That's what he'd reduced me to. A hungover mess of raging hormones and undying love for a man who didn't want me. I was just going to have to face the facts. We'd never stay friends, because we never were friends. And I had to find a way to live with it.

 **To be continued….Please leave some feedback for this story! I'm hoping you all are enjoying this twisted love story. Thanks for the PM's and the comments! Keep them coming!**


	15. Chapter 15

**Disclaimer:** I own none of the characters here. JK Rowling and company own them. I merely play with them for my own amusement. Please don't sue. I have nothing of value anyway.

 **Summary:** Harry is caught in a love triangle to rival all else. He's found himself questioning his sexuality and is owning up to his attraction to Draco Malfoy. Meanwhile Draco is cozying up to Hermione, who won't give him the time of day. And Hermione keeps thinking there's hope for her and Harry to have a future together. It's a tangled web of emotions and will anyone get what they want? Set a couple of years after Hogwarts ended. Told from Harry's POV. Drarry, with undertones of Dramione.

 **Three is a Crowd**

After my spectacular meltdown, I felt like a fool. Draco had no idea what I'd done, and Hermione swore she'd kept my secret. But I hadn't seen Draco since that night. I was always too busy at work, and then I'd miss him at lunches. Hermione said he was very distant and quiet with her and that they'd stopped eating together for the most part. He would often take lunch at his desk and didn't look at her when she passed by unless she specifically needed to speak to him. It wasn't just me he'd said goodbye to. It was her too. Only he hadn't come right out and said it to her. And this upset her probably as much as it upset me when he told me goodbye. She was trying to be strong and play it cool, but she admitted she was worried about him. He wasn't himself. And isolating himself away from everyone, even his old friends, wasn't making her less concerned. It only made her worry for him more and fret over the mistake he was about to make. We talked about him endlessly until I couldn't stand it anymore. Even being out of our lives, he was all consuming. Then one day Hermione met me for lunch and looked even more harried and upset than normal. I asked her what was wrong.

"Draco is leaving the Ministry," she told me, trying to hold back tears.

"What? Why?" I asked in confusion.

"He said he's going to work for Astoria's father in his company. They sell quills and ink. He's going to be some sort of business broker now. It was part of the marriage deal," she said with tears rolling down her cheeks.

"Oh God…for real? He's leaving here? I can't fucking believe this," I said feeling shocked and appalled at the news. Especially because it was hitting Hermione so hard. I reached over and took her hand. "It's gonna be okay."

"No, it's really not. I've held my tongue for all this time, but what he's doing is awful. I-I thought I meant something to him and now he barely even looks at me. He only spoke to me today because he was putting in his notice. I don't know what to do, Harry," she cried softly.

I pulled her to me and held her tight. People kept walking by looking at us and wondering if someone died. And it felt like they had. Draco was leaving. We wouldn't even see him at work anymore. And he'd effectively shut us both out. Why would he do this to us? _How_ could he do this to us, was the better question. But I had no answers. We just found a table and didn't get any food and simply held hands and talked the entire time.

"I know you loved him, but he said you'd given him the cold shoulder because you wouldn't be 'that' girl," I said to her, trying to remind her she'd shut him down first. Not that I was saying she had it coming, but I wanted to remind her that she'd started this mess between them.

But it wasn't helpful. She just looked at me like I was a heartless monster and made a face at me.

"Just because I said I wouldn't fool around with him anymore doesn't mean I shut him out. I didn't abandon him. I was just trying to do the right thing," she explained tearfully.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you. I just thought maybe you'd already said goodbye to him in your own way," I restated what I was trying to get across.

"I never thought he'd leave though. I thought he'd always be around. Remember how you felt that night in the alley?" she asked me and I nodded my head. "That's how I feel right now. I can't believe he's doing this to us. To _me_."

I was still reeling from the news and hadn't had time to process it yet, but now was my time to be there for Hermione like I said I'd be. She was hurting now and I had to help her. I just didn't know how exactly when I was feeling just as badly as she was. But I took her hands and held them tightly.

"Listen, you said yourself we'll find someone else. Draco isn't worth it. All this pain? It's not worth it," I told her, wishing so badly that I believed my own words.

But just when I told her that, Draco showed up in the cafeteria and appeared to be looking for us. I didn't wave him down though. I just stared at him wordlessly and Hermione's eyes followed mine and spied him standing there. Looking. Wanting. But weren't going to make it easy for him. If he was looking for us, he'd find us. And if he wasn't looking for us, he could just go eat shit, for all I cared. Which was a lie I told myself to feel better. But eventually he did spot us and came over to where we were sitting. He stood there a moment and didn't say anything as he witnessed Hermione wiping her eyes and us holding hands. I could tell he realized he was the cause of this scene and hung his head down.

"I suppose you heard the news then," he said looking at me.

"Yeah, you're leaving. Why?" I challenged him.

"I have to. It's part of the deal. My father says this job is a dead end and I have a chance to work in business where I'm probably better suited. I didn't have a choice, Potter," he admitted sadly.

"You do have choices, Malfoy. You _chose_ this path. You could have chosen differently. But you're just a puppet of your father's. No mind of your own. Just bowing down to Daddy. You've always been weak like that," I spat at him seething with the anger I'd tried so hard to keep inside me. But it was blowing out of me full force.

"Don't fucking call me weak, you bastard. I'm doing what needs to be done. What did you think was going to happen with the three of us really? We'd all live happily together in a ski lodge having group sex every night?" he hissed back at me.

"No. I didn't fucking think that. But look what you're doing! You're breaking hearts all over the place and in case you didn't realize it yet, you're breaking your own heart in the process. Or do you not have a heart any longer?" I wondered venomously.

"Harry, stop. It's okay," Hermione tried to calm me down, but I wasn't having any of that.

"No, I'm not gonna stop until he admits what he's doing is wrong and cowardly. It's the easy way out," I said glaring at him.

"Potter, you'd do well to keep your voice down. And I know it may seem like a cowardly thing to do to you, but you've got nothing to lose here. I do. I have everything to lose. And I won't do it. That's why I'm choosing this path. Because I don't want to lose everything," he shot back at me.

"But you already have lost everything. You've lost me and Hermione. What else is there that's really worth anything?" I challenged him.

He just stood there and said nothing to me. I'd rendered him mute. I think he knew I was right but would rather die than admit it. So he just said nothing. Finally he bowed his head and looked at both of us.

"I'm sorry. For all of it. I never meant to hurt anyone. And I certainly never meant to lose either one of you. But it's just the way life has gone. I hope one day you'll forgive me. Because believe me, I won't forgive myself. But I have to live with my choices. You two are free to find real love with a real person who isn't so fucked up and living under Daddy's thumb. You both deserve better than me anyway. You always did. So just cut your losses and forget about me," he said full of emotion to the point I thought he may start crying too.

"I don't want to forget you," I said softly, coming down off my anger high.

"I don't want to forget you either," Hermione chimed in.

He sighed.

"Well then please remember the good times and forget the bad. At least keep happy memories of me."

"Don't leave," I said imploringly.

"I have to leave."

"Why? Why can't you just say no?" Hermione asked sadly.

"Because I can't. Maybe that does make me weak, I don't know. You just don't understand my life. It's never been my own. Not really. And nothing changes that. I have to do this. I'm sorry," he said, and turned on his heel and walked away from us.

He just left us there. Wanting. Needing. And never having again. His words echoed in my ears. He had to do this. He was sorry. It was the same words he'd said to Dumbledore before he tried to kill him. Only this time I felt like it was me that was in danger of dying. And Hermione too. She was taking this just as hard. But she was so stoic sometimes that it was hard to read her. But her hands were trembling and her face was blotchy and red. Tears pooled in her eyes and I was helpless to stop them. I just rubbed her arm and told her I'd never leave and that we'd get through it. But she finally had enough and excused herself from the table and ran off to the ladies room, presumably to cry herself senseless. I couldn't follow her and I didn't think she wanted me to anyway. She needed to be alone with this now, just like I was alone with it too. We could walk together, but we ultimately were alone in our own personal hell. And so was Draco. The only difference was, he chose this hell. He couldn't stand up for himself and this is what happened. He'd have to live the rest of his life knowing that we were the ones who got away. And someday when he was old, he was going to look back on this moment and hate himself for it. That I was certain of. He'd lost two amazing people in his life and one day he was going to regret it, if he didn't already.

The next few days went by and Draco didn't come near us. Then the weekend happened and Hermione and I tried to get our lives back normal the way they used to be before Draco. But we were both still sad. Especially when we got an owl at our window with a package for us. It was from Draco. At first Hermione told me to chuck the box in a bin, but I was insanely curious what he'd send to us. So I opened it up. Inside were two envelopes with letters inside and two long jewelry boxes. I handed Hermione her envelope and one of the long boxes and told her to open it. She didn't want to at first, but I told her I was opening mine and they appeared to be the same thing. So we decided to read our letters first. I opened it up and read it to myself.

It read:

 _Dear Harry,_

 _I know you're angry with me and have every right to be. Perhaps I am weak and still a coward because I can't stand up to my father. You just don't understand what it's like to be a Malfoy. There are certain standards to uphold and my father let me run amok for several years, to which I thoroughly enjoyed myself. But he said it's time to grow up. Who am I to argue? I'll never regret the time I spent with you though. I loved you for so long. I never dreamed you'd love me back. But we aren't meant to be, Harry. Like I said before, in another life… I've given you and Hermione matching necklaces with a dragon on it. I want you to wear it and think of me always. Never forget. I know I said to forget me, but I changed my mind. Remember me. But do move on and live your life. That's the only thing that could make me happier than I already am to have had you in my life. Move on and love again. But keep my memory close to your heart. I will always keep your memory close to mine._

 _Love Always,_

 _Draco_

I waited for Hermione to finish her letter before I opened the jewelry box. But inside I found a silver chain with a pewter dragon hanging from it. And Hermione had the same one. She was crying though, while I managed to keep my tears in check. I don't know what her letter said, but I imagined it was similar to mine. I didn't ask to read it as it was private and not meant for my eyes. And she didn't ask to read mine. But we both put the necklaces on and sat there on the couch holding our letters and playing with the dragon pendants around our neck. We didn't speak at first for a long time, both just alone with our thoughts. But finally I broke the silence.

"I'm going to wear this forever I think," I admitted softly.

Hermione laughed slightly, but not because it was funny. It was more of a wry laugh.

"I probably will too. That's how stupid I am."

"You're not stupid. And it was a nice gesture."

"But he's still gone."

"Yep, he's still gone."

We just laid our heads together and sat on the couch and sighed into the night. There was nothing else to do. He had really said goodbye this time. And even given a parting gift. Of which I never would take off. I knew that much. I wanted to remember the good times. The fun times. And maybe even the bad times too. It was all a scene in my head that was distinctly Draco. Laughter, tears, yelling, whispering, kissing, cuddling, fighting, and saying goodbye. I'd remember it all. And I'd remember it fondly. No matter how hurt I was, I'd still remember it fondly. Because he was a part of my life and I was a part of his and nothing would ever change that. We grew together and grew apart. That last thing was his doing, but like I said before, sometimes the friends we have, don't stay our friends forever. Some people are meant to come into your life and stay for a short time, and then leave. They teach you something about yourself. There's a saying that people are with you for a reason, a season or a lifetime. And Draco was there for a reason. And now it was time for him to go. But he taught me who I really was, and for that I'd always be grateful.

The months went on and eventually Hermione and I got out of our funk and back into the swing of things. We were as tight as ever, thankfully. I really worried for a while that things would be different between us after the skiing holiday. But we were too close for that to kill what we had. I just wish it was the kind of love you married someone for. Because I would marry her in a heartbeat if I didn't know it was completely unfair to her. And for her part, she seemed content to just be with me. She knew we'd never be lovers or get married, but she wasn't really excited to date anyone else just yet. She wanted to stay with me. And I wanted her with me. It felt good and familiar. And like our lives were the same as before the day Draco walked back into our lives. I wondered from time to time how he was doing though. Until the day that the wedding invite came by owl. They were to be married in May. We thought about not going but then we decided it'd be good closure for us to see him get married and maybe finally meet this Astoria bird who'd ruined our lives. But we'd be civil and polite about it all. We'd even bring a gift.

When the day of the wedding came we were both nervous to see him again. It had been a while. But when we showed up at his family home, he greeted us at the gates. The wedding was outside and he was waiting there to welcome guests while his parents stood by him. It was rather awkward at first because his father didn't know what to think of me and Hermione being there. But Draco smiled when he saw us.

"You came," he said softly, looking dapper as ever. The tux he wore made him even more handsome than I'd ever seen him. But I didn't verbalize that opinion.

"Of course we came. We sent the reply card, didn't we?" I mentioned with a small grin.

"It's lovely to see you both. It really is. And I notice you're wearing the dragons," he pointed out the chains around our neck.

We both absently fingered the pewter dragons we wore and Draco showed us his matching one. The Three Musketeers or something like that. It was our secret. No one else had the same necklaces we had. I suspected Draco got one for himself so he'd never forget us either. It was touching actually. But it didn't change that he was about to be married off.

"So are you nervous?" I wondered curiously, making polite small talk.

"Yes. But everyone tells me that's normal."

"I'm sure it is. But I bet you'd be a lot less nervous if you actually knew who your wife to be was," Hermione chimed in with some slight bitterness.

I didn't know she was still angry, but I guess she was. She never talked about it though. But Draco picked up on her not so subtle snub of his nuptials.

"I do know her. Well enough, I suppose. We have our whole lives to know each other though," he said, not letting her get to him on his special day.

"Right then, well where should we sit? Anywhere?" I interjected just wanting to be out of his presence for the time being before Hermione lost her shit and said something she'd regret.

Draco pointed us to the grooms side of the huge aisle they'd set up in the yard and told us there was champagne fountains if we wanted bubbly. Then he had to greet other guests and we were relegated to being just nameless people in a crowd. It was a really big wedding. I didn't think Draco knew this many people, but everyone he used to hang around with in school was there, along with Pansy who was married to some other man that I didn't know. People in these circles got married so young, I thought to myself. I barely knew who I was yet and I was still a virgin. And everyone Draco knew was married. It was so strange and such a different world. A world I'd never belong in. A world he spared me from by never even trying to take me home with him. Even if his parents accepted me, which they never would, I don't think I could live this lifestyle. I was a simple man. With simple needs. I just wanted to find love. And I wanted Hermione to find love. And I wanted Draco to find love too. But now he never really would. Not in the same way the rest of us could. He was being forced to marry someone he barely knew. That wasn't romantic, it was just tragic. But it wasn't my business any longer.

When everyone was seated and it was time to begin, I craned my neck over the crowd to see this supposed blushing bride for myself. She appeared and she was quite pretty, I must admit. She looked very well to do and polished, just like Draco. And I realized again how much I'd never fit into this world of his. But she seemed happy to be marrying him. Hell I would have been happy too. She landed herself a good man. A man I myself wanted to keep forever, but had to let go of. But once the ceremony was over, Hermione and I sat in the back of the aisle and sipped champagne while everyone else danced. We watched the happy couple and we both looked wistful about it. But we didn't say much at first. We just downed our drinks and tried to drown our sorrows. I finally spoke though.

"So that was weird as fuck," I admitted with a small chuckle.

"You can say that again," she laughed along with me.

"I can't believe he actually did it," I sighed.

"Me neither."

"But Astoria seems lovely I guess," I shrugged.

"Yeah, but she's not us," Hermione pointed out, downing her champagne.

"Nope, she's not. I love us. I love us way more than her," I told her.

"I love us too! We're good catches. Someone's gonna snap us up. You'll see. We won't always be a sad story," she assured me.

"Good because I don't want to be a sad story. I want the fairytale," I confessed, the champagne going straight to my head.

"You'll get it. We both will. Draco doesn't deserve us. He never did. Couldn't even make up his mind," she grumbled.

"I know. But when it was good, it was great."

"Touché."

"But you're right. We both deserve love. Someone who will love _only_ us. We shouldn't have ever settled for less," I told her seriously.

"I know. But I think I thought it was better than nothing at the time. I really loved that bugger. Stupid prat," she pouted.

"I really loved him too. But hey, at least you're not still a virgin," I lamented sadly.

"Yeah, but I never had real sex with Draco. I haven't been laid in years. I might be a born again virgin," she sighed.

"I still think of Draco as my first even if we never had actual sex. He taught me what I liked and for that I thank him," I told her.

"He was a really fantastic kisser, wasn't he?" she said dreamily.

"Definitely."

"I miss that about him."

"I do too."

"But there will be other better kissers," I said assuredly. I hoped I was right about that. I had to be. This couldn't be the end of our story.

"You bet there will be better kissers," she promised me as she downed the rest of her glass and crossed her arms across her chest.

We just sat in silence again taking in the atmosphere. It was a lovely wedding. Even if it was painful for us to sit through. And we didn't really know any of the guests aside from people we went to school with and hated them. We didn't see much point in mingling with them. We were just alone with our own melancholy. I was thinking of how odd it was to watch someone you love marry someone else and be helpless to stop it. And I wager Hermione was thinking the same thing. But I knew my life would go on and so would hers. We decided to leave early though because we felt out of place. So we tracked Draco down to say our goodbyes.

"You're leaving already?" he asked with disappointment.

"Yeah, we don't really fit in here very well. And let's face it, it's weird," I told him softly so as not to alert his new wife who was busy chatting up some other people.

"I guess it is a little weird. But thank you for coming," he said sincerely.

"No problem. Thanks for the invite."

"Yes, thanks," Hermione chimed in tipsily.

"Sorry to see you go, but just remember. Don't forget me," he said with a wink.

"Never," I said as I held out my dragon necklace to him and Hermione held hers out too.

Draco just smiled and held his out. Then he grabbed both of us into a hug. It wasn't a sexy hug and he didn't linger too long, but it was affectionate enough.

"I'll see you guys around," he said giving us a grin.

"See you around," I said back with my own grin.

And when we walked away, we both knew we'd never see him around. Not anymore. We hadn't seen him for months now and I doubted that would change now. If anything he'd be more scarce. But that was okay. We'd get along without him. We had to. In another life…his words echoed in my head. If only. But there was this life to live now and I intended to start living it. It would be a life without Draco, but somehow I knew I'd be okay.

 **Epilogue:**

 **Two years later…**

I bet you're all wondering what happened with my life after Draco's ridiculous wedding. Did we ever see him again? No, we never did. But we got Christmas cards and birthday greetings and the scattered odd letter and that was enough. He said he was thriving and happy and expecting his first child. That was all so removed from me and my life. But I wasn't alone anymore. That's right. I found someone. Someone pretty fucking special. His name is Michael and we met years ago. Remember the young charge I had who saved my ass when I got hurt? Well it turns out we had a lot of things in common. We became partners in the Auror business and partners in the bedroom too. I had no idea he was gay at first because I'm clueless like that. But when he kept fawning over me and giving me hints that he wanted to go out, I had to get my head out of my ass and oblige him. We had our first kiss on the terrace of a French restaurant in the city. And yes, he kisses just as well as Draco did. Maybe even better? I might be biased because for the first time ever, I'm in love with someone who loves me back. I told Draco all about it and he was pleased for me. Hermione was also pleased for me. She was ecstatic I finally found the person I feel is made for me.

And for her part, she met another man too. His name is Raymond and he took Draco's spot in the Ministry after he'd left. They had a parade of people in the position before Raymond stuck it out. No one else could put up with Hermione's bossy nature for very long. But Ray was a good guy. He treated her right. We were friends. We were all friends. And it was wonderful. Double dates and many nights playing games together and drinking and doing couples activities. We all took a holiday together this time to a beach in the Maldives. We had separate rooms and no orgies took place and the beach was much more my speed than the skiing. Life was pretty fucking perfect. I still think about Draco though from time to time. I still wear the pendant and so does Hermione. We told our respective others that it was a friendship necklace. We just failed to mention what the dragon meant and who else had one. It was our little secret. And would always remain so. I suspect there will always be a place in my heart for Draco, even if it crashed and burned. He was the first man I ever loved. And even if he didn't love me back the right way, I'd never forget it. It was part of my story. Draco was part of my story. And it wasn't a sad story any longer. It was a happy one. And I'd never forget his role in my story. But I was writing a new ending. This time a happy one. I got the fairytale after all.

 **The End**

 **Please leave some feedback for this story! I'm hoping you all are enjoying this twisted love story. Thanks for the PM's and the comments! Keep them coming!**


End file.
